Family wedding pics

Tygirljojo

I really want to do this, but...FI's parents are divorced.  They're amicable and based on what I've heard and seen, there are no hard feelings between them.  And I'm kind of unsure of it since FI's stepmom will be at the wedding as well. 

History: FI's parents divorced when he was 20 (14 years ago).  Dad moved to CO and remarried.  FI isn't close with his stepfamily at all (understandably so).  Not that he has any issues with them, just distance, only met them all once (at his dad's wedding) and has seen his dad a total of 1 time in the 5 years we've been together.  As I mentioned, his dad and mom are on good terms - when FSIL was seriously sick and in ICU a couple years ago, his dad flew up to Spokane to see her and stayed at his mom's place (in the spare bedroom of course!).  FMIL and FStepMIL haven't met before but they have spoken on the phone a few times. 

Thoughts?

mma3

I would take some pictures with both sets of parents.  I am sure that given the situation Dad will pose with mom for you both.

sarack

I think that it will be fine and if you need to exclude the stepmom for a few pics she'll totally understand. She probably knows that she isn't his mom and you guys want pics with your moms and dads. If he were close to his family that would be one thing but they aren't. Everything will be fine. I wouldn't worry about it. Just give Jenny your list and let her start calling names.

Tygirljojo

Sorry, I need to clarify.  Displaying at the wedding, old family wedding pictures - as in the wedding picture from when FI's parents married on their wedding day, my parents on their wedding day, grandparents on their wedding day, etc.  That's what happens when I post up something after thinking about something for a long time. :P  I know what I'm talking about, but no one does unless I explain - DUH!

melissa82

I don't see a problem with them posing for a photo or two. It will probably take all of a minute.

At a friend's wedding, his divorced parents do not get along at all, but they still posed for photos. They're usually on either side of the groom or bride and groom so it's not like they have to wrap their arms around each other or anything.

BrandyL10

I think that should be just fine. If they're on a friendly basis, then I don't think stepmom should be offended. There was a life before her, not to sound mean. I think if they're being civil and his mom and stepmom have talked a few times, then stepmom won't think anything of it. If I were a stepmom I would be expecting it! My opinion!

melissa82

Just saw your clarification. I personally wouldn't. I think it's just weird and a bit rude because there's no reason you NEED to display wedding photos. If I were his mom or dad, I'd feel really awkward having that photo of me displayed. I think relatives would think it was odd, too.

Have you asked FI's parents how they would feel? I think it's really their opinion that matters since they are the ones in the photos.

Archel

NO WAY. My parents just got divorced and my FI's parents are divorced and there is no way I would even consider having their marriage photos displayed!!  Maybe grandparent photos - that's sort of vintage and cute, but don't do either parents if one set is divorced!!

KST_

I would be against it. I mean, yes, that's the marriage that produced him, but I still wouldn't display it.

Tygirljojo

Yeah, that's kind of what I'm leaning towards.  The more I think about it, the more I worry it would make FStepMIL (and possibly FFIL & FMIL) feel awkward and I just don't want her to feel that way.

jennlin

i agree...it would be awkward to display their photo..

jennuinne

I think it really depends on the situation.  My parents divorced when I was five, both have remarried and/or redivorced since then.  They have no issues w/ each other, but aren't close either.  I would feel fine using pictures of my parents at the wedding and/or slideshow b/c they are MY parents and I don't think any of my family or step-mom or my mom's boy friend would be offended.  In our slide show I have a photo of my mom and dad, me and my brother when we were really little and they were still married.  I'm not concerned about it at all.  Although, maybe their wedding picture would be different?  I don't know.  If the divorce were more recent, I could see how that would be an issue.

cupcakepirate

DH's maternal grandparents were divorced and both remarried before MIL and FIL got married, so we used their 2nd wedding photos (I don't think there was one from when his grandparents got married). No one was awkward abotu anything, they are just photos after all.

We displayed my parents wedding photo even though they've been divorced for over 15 years. No one thought it was weird/my parents weren't awkward because of it.