Step-Mothers on Mother's Day

AuntFlo

Maybe I'm strange.  
My step-mother  has been married to my dad for almost 25 years.  She has always been so good to me and my brother, and has been there for me through so many tough times.   She's a great wife to my father and a truely good person.
I've always treated her well on Mother's Day.   Always a card and always a gift.   I can't imagine not recognizing her on Mother's Day.   Yes, I have my own mother, who is awesome, but step-mom has done some major mothering of me as well.

My mom has been married to step-father for 15 years.   Granted, her step-children were adults when they got married, so she hasn't had to do much mothering of them.   But she has always been so incredibly good to them.   She goes out of her way to show them that she loves them and is there for them.   She's also the one that makes sure her husband stays a part of his kid's lives, you know?

Step-sister got my mom a Mother's Day card (which is at least something) but step-brother and his wife got my mom nothing.   Didn't even say "Happy Mother's Day" to her when they saw her yesterday.   I observed all of this and was fuming.   My mom wouldn't say anything, but I'm sure it has to hurt her.  And it wasn't just this year.  It's every year and at bdays and xmas, too.

Am I just weird that I honor my step-mother, or are they awful kids?  I'm also someone who makes sure to honor her aunts on Mother's Day, because of how important they've been in my life.  So maybe I just expect to much.

What do you guys think?

nicoleg1982

I always sent my sMother gifts for MDay.  Like you, my parents were married for over 20 years, so she *was* a second mother to me.  However, since she and Dad divorced, she has been strange and distant.  She refuses to give me an address and since she feels that way, I'm not going to badger my sSiblings for it.  So I sent her a wall post via FB.  Lame, but WTF can a girl do?

**O-Face**

H doesn't recognize step-mother in any way on Mother's Day and I'm fairly certain none of siblings do either.  Stepmother and FIL have been married around 18 years I believe.

6fsn

I'd say the kids are pretty lame.  Maybe because they were older, but still how hard is a card.

MinM

I think everyone has different relationships with other people. Maybe your step-brother has some issues you don't know about - or maybe he is just a thoughtless person. I would try to let it go, for everyone's sake.

Heffalump

Honestly, I NEVER gave my dad's wife a card for Mother's Day.  I was 24 when they married, and she's never been any sort of mother figure to me.  (In my case, the fact that my dad's affair with her ended my parents' marriage probably factored into my feelings.

I did, however, send her a card from DD this year (following some good adviSe from WW).  She acts sort of grandmotherly toward DD, and DD is going to grow up seeing her. 

So no, I may be in the minority here but I don't think they're awful kids.  If your mom hasn't been like a mother to them, why would they give her a Mother's Day card?

AuntFlo

Hmmm...  I didn't even think about the grandparent aspect of MD.  Both of my step-sibling have a kid each, that my mom watches for them all the time.   She didn't get a MD card from the grandkids either.  
So, my mom is good enough to watch their kids (and the kids love her) but not enough for a simple $1.99 card.
It's just irritating.   I'm sure I'll get over it in a few days, you know.

**O-Face**

Yeah, that is definitely crappy AF.

zsazsa-stl

It doesn't seem like it would kill them to say something.  Maybe they feel like they are being disloyal to their own mother if they do anything for her.  Maybe their own mother has said some (rude, selfish) things about hoping that they don't do anything for their step-mother.