Wedding Woes
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MOH can't make it to my wedding now?

So long story short, My MOH's brother just got engaged and his date was supposed to be in August. So when I called my MOH last week informing her our date would be in October, that was more than fine. So as of Monday, everything was booked for October 29th, 2011. I talked to her on the phone Monday evening. She said that her brothers was going to have black bridesmaid dresses and if I was too, maybe we could pick the same style so she would only have to buy one dress. I said that would be great, I was glad to help her out. We made plans to go try on dresses and get together about planning

Well her mom wrote on my facebook wall about an hour ago "BRIDE WARS!!! <Insert MOH's name here>'s little brothers getting married on the same day! She can't miss her little brothers wedding!!"

all I have to say is WTF???!!! Is this how you tell a bride to be that her MOH is out? The MOH has yet to even talk to me about this. 

I'm not expecting her to be a MOH anymore or even be able to attend my wedding, so I am now in the situation to ask the next girl in line. How do I do this? How do I word it?

By the way, I'm not mad at my MOH. She did nothing wrong. I'm more amazed at her mother for informing me the way she did, and for her brother and his fiance to not consider my already booked date as I made sure that mine was not booked on theirs. oh well 

Re: MOH can't make it to my wedding now?

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    edited December 2011
    yeah, your friend's mom is WAAAAAAAY out of line here.  WTF indeed.
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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    What the what at her mom?  Who does that?!

    You don't *have* to ask anyone else.  You can just not have a MOH and that's OK.

    I'm glad you have a good perspective on this.  Good luck and I would unfriend your MOH's mom.
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    MrsMyrtleMrsMyrtle member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Just ignore her.
    image
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    edited December 2011

    Just ask one of your bridesmaids that you are really close to if they would mind being your moh or just pick someone else who is close to you but is not in your wedding yet. An aunt, a cousin, a close friend of the family....

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    MrsMyrtleMrsMyrtle member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_moh-cant-wedding-now?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:58668084-1047-4a0f-9503-5abb075f941bPost:3b22192d-484b-4c0e-8b48-b3a3653cd65b">Re: MOH can't make it to my wedding now?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Just ask one of your bridesmaids that you are really close to if they would mind being your moh or just pick someone else who is close to you but is not in your wedding yet. An aunt, a cousin, a close friend of the family....
    Posted by southernbell2011[/QUOTE]

    <div>Uh, no. There should never be a "Fill-In" MOH. </div>
    image
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    HeffalumpHeffalump member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_moh-cant-wedding-now?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:58668084-1047-4a0f-9503-5abb075f941bPost:3b22192d-484b-4c0e-8b48-b3a3653cd65b">Re: MOH can't make it to my wedding now?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Just ask one of your bridesmaids that you are really close to if they would mind being your moh or just pick someone else who is close to you but is not in your wedding yet. An aunt, a cousin, a close friend of the family....
    Posted by southernbell2011[/QUOTE]

    FAIL
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    edited December 2011
    Wow...her mother has no tact whatsoever.  As PPs have said, you don't have to have a MOH.  Your original MOH, is still your MOH regardless of her ability to attend and I'm sure she'll still want to participate in any pre-wedding activities.

    Although her brother didn't have to plan around your date when choosing his, if he were more considerate of his sister he would have at least given a thought to the fact that she was already committed to your wedding that day.  It really stinks for her - and I bet she feels bad (and possibly embarassed by the way her mom broke the news). 

    Since she's your good friend - maybe give her a call and just tell her that you love her and that you'll miss her but you understand.
    image
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    edited December 2011
    I would not have a fill in MOH. She may not be able to be at your wedding but she can still help. You have a good perspective on it since she had no control over when her brother and fiancee decided to get married. So I would still call her your MOH and not have one at the wedding.  Most guests won't know there is no MOH and if you want you could put in your program a special thanks to her for helping if she helps a lot and make sure to give her one.  I would unfriend her mother on facebook asap. That was completely out of line. 
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