Wedding Woes

Letting Groom See me Before Ceremony

My fiance and I are having our wedding and reception at the same venue. After the ceremony, the reception will start with a cocktail hour with appetizers. We want to participate in that with our family and guests, but because we need to take our wedding pictures with the bridal party after the ceremony, we will miss the cocktail hour. My mom, sister, and fiance all want to be at the cocktail hour(especially sonce we are paying for it). My fiance suggested we get to our venue early before the ceremony and take pictures before the wedding that way we can still participate in cocktail hour. He is fine with seeing me before I walk down the aisle. I was hoping to have him be excited to see me for the first time when I walk to say my vows. He says he will be excited just knowing we are about to make a commitment to each other. I'm looking for suggestions........I admit, I would like to have cocktails too..........Laughing I also have another dress I have had for years that i was thinking of wearing for the pre-wedding pictures (it is couture and was gift from the owner of a boutique i worked at)it would work as a one-of-a-kind dress for a wedding. i was thinking of wearing it for pre-wedding pictures then changing into my wedding gown for the ceremoy and reception that way I can wear two gowns (which has been a dream of mine) and my groom will still be surprised.I need input,ladies! :-)
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Re: Letting Groom See me Before Ceremony

  • foreva2828foreva2828 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'm not sure if my response fits into any of the above choices. My fiance and I decided to just do pictures before the ceremony, partially for similar reasons (wanting to be at the cocktail hour/not hold up the reception) and partially because we both are anxious people by nature and the last thing we need is for either of us to get all hyped up right as the wedding is starting. I'm sure he'll be anxious/excited when he sees me the first time and as the wedding begins, but hopefully it'll calm us both down a bit, and to me it doesn't matter when we see each other as long as we have a fabulous day.
  • zaneopalzaneopal member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think the excitement of getting married will last all day and for that reason, pre-wedding pictures are okay with me. As for the gown issue, I guess decide which dress you're more comfortable partying in and wear that dress at the reception and the other for your pictures and the ceremony. If you want to be at cocktail hour and not hold up the reception, pre-wedding pictures are the way to go. Additionally, you'll have more time to do pictures before the wedding.

    Also, I don't believe in that whole "seeing the bride before the ceremony is bad luck" thing. Various cultures have been doing it for millenia (Jews come to mind first) with little pre-wedding rituals and they seemed to work out just fine.
  • edited December 2011
    If you want to enjoy your cocktail hour, go for it.  Do your pics ahead of time.  And I promise, whether your FI sees you in the couture dress or your wedding dress (or both, if you have time!), he will still have 'that' feeling when he sees you walking down the aisle.
  • edited December 2011
    IMO, pre-wedding pictures are not a problem if you both are OK with it.  We did pictures before the ceremony b/c of venue scheduling issues and it worked out fine....  I ended up hiding at the picture site until my H arrived, so we did have a special moment seeing each other for the first time (and the photographer got a series of action shots of us seeing each other, which are great). 

    So, my vote would be to do pre-wedding pictures in your "real" dress, then have the ceremony, cocktail hour and reception.  But it seems like you want to wear two gowns that day, so I don't know.
  • edited December 2011
    If you're both fine seeing each other before, then go for it. No sense missing your cocktial hour for pictures if you can get them done ahead of time! And wear whatever dress you prefer, that's totally up to you.

    Personally, I am waiting to walk down the aisle. We will see each other the morning of to finish setting up and everything, but then we'll retreat to our respective upstairs bedrooms to get ready (and we'll be literally right across the hall from each other, it's a small upstairs). But he rarely sees me in a dress, let alone a fancy one, so I want him to be surprised.
  • LarissaAnnLarissaAnn member
    5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Do the photos beforehand.  We did and don't regret it a bit.  The photog sets up a "reveal" shot for the first time he sees you in the dress anyway.

    And I wouldn't wear two dresses, that sounds like a complete PITA when you've already got your hair & makeup done and you're about to get married - to add the stress of having to get changed.
  • edited December 2011
    Thank you , ladies! I'm taking the pre-ceremony pics, staying in one dress, and enjoying the cocktail hour with family, friends, and my new hubby!Cheers!Laughing
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