BIG Bridesmaid Problem! :/

courtec2007

So...my cousin, who used to be like my sister, had me in her wedding 2 years ago and I was the MOH. Since then, she has moved away, with her husband that I am not fond of, and we have grown apart. We rarely talk and I'm really having a problem with deciding whether or not to have her in mine. I know that she would be very upset and hurt, but I feel that it would be awkward!

Please Help!

4LeafClover3

You should only have people in your wedding that you are close to and will make your wedding a happy occassion... not an awkward one. Just because you were in her wedding doesn't mean she gets an automatic invite to be in yours.

em01092

Ditto 4 leaf. Don't ask out of obligation. She more than likley will understand why you didn't ask and won't say anything. If she does, which would be rude of her, just explain that unfortunately you've grown apart. 

sanfranciscoeve

That's a tricky situation...You could also consider having her do something special in the wedding that's not being a bridesmaid, like a reading, toast, etc. Or you could do something before the wedding, like, "I'm sorry we're not as close as we used to be, but you've been a really special person in my life. Can I take you out to dinner/get our nails done/whatever when you're in town?"

courtec2007

Thanks ladies! You've really helped. This is a problem that has been plaguing me for some time now. Any suggestions about how I go about telling her that she's not in the wedding!

mandi921vh

She will get the idea she is not a BM when you don't ask her. You don't need to tell her why she isn't a BM, that will just make her feel worse.