S/O Oface's Judgy post - have you ever wondered if there's something wrong with a kid?

tawillers

Gig kid makes me wonder.

He didn't sit up unassisted until he was 12 months old.  He's now 15 months and will still be sitting on the floor, playing with a toy, and just topple over.  I mean, his head aims for the floor like it's a magnet.  He doesn't put his arms out to steady himself or catch himself.  He hits his head on the floor every.single.day.

He just started crawling at 13 months.

He's started to walk a few steps, but never gets too far away from the furniture.  He's very unbalanced, as any baby is when they first start taking steps.

He's still on a formula/whole milk mix in a bottle and on baby food.  I completely understand that it's the parent's decision on how long they drink formula and eat baby food.  I get that.  But while he's at my house (6:45am - 3:30pm), he gets one jar of food and drinks the rest of his meals.  Also, he still doesn't know how to eat the baby food because he just started it and gags on it every day because they buy him the stage 3 chunky stuff.

Flame me if I deserve it, but I judge these parents every day.  It's very obvious they don't play with him or encourage his development.  I feel very terrible when I wonder if the kid is just slow and they don't know it or they haven't told me.

**O-Face**

I'm only a little ::open mouth:: at going straight to stage 3 baby food. 

baconsmom

I haven't really had this experience - I mean, I wondered about some of the daycare kids, but that was mostly the 6-y-olds who couldn't use forks - but I've had the opposite.

Godson was walking, running, and climbing by the time he was, like, 18 months? But he wasn't really talking. Babbling, making sounds, working on it, but he didn't have any actual words.

To me, this was normal. My brothers barely talked before they were around 3, and they're all smart people. BFF had taught Godson some signs and things, too, so he was communicating. 

Well, BFF got him a speech therapist. At 18 months. Because he wasn't talking yet. I though this was the most ridiculous thing I'd ever heard. 

I also judge them about feeding issues, but that's because every meal we have with them is uncomfortably peppered with "Take two bites! Eat your food! No, you can't leave the table till you eat your [whatever]!" and they ignore all subtle hints about different options. 

nicoleg1982

Jesus.  I would try to say something, if you can.

tawillers

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_ofaces-judgy-post-ever-wondered-theres-something-wrong-kid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:97c6a70e-8ca4-44dd-b38f-18ef79be3d2bPost:de48feff-5370-4af9-be1b-66b5fb9dfeb2">Re: S/O Oface's Judgy post - have you ever wondered if there's something wrong with a kid?</a>:
[QUOTE]Jesus.  I would try to say something, if you can.
Posted by nicoleg1982[/QUOTE]

I have been at a complete loss at what I would say if I did.  DH tells me it's not my place.  What if they know he's got something wrong with hiim?  But at the same time, shouldn't they tell his daycare provider?

Also, this kid is still waking up 3-4 times in the middle of the night.  And they give him a bottle.  And they wonder why he won't eat more during the day.

**O-Face**

Kid is HUNGRY.

nicoleg1982

My DCP has mentioned things to me, or heard me whine about sleepless nights and made recommendations.  I never took offense, but I've got thick skin.

How about:

Hey Mom.  As Kid has gotten older, he still doesn't seem to have much interest in walking.  I'm sure he has had regular check ups with the pedi, but I would be happy to lend you my exersaucer/walker on the weekends so that you can work with him at home.  He chases my DD around on his knees all day, so if we motivate him to use his feet, I know the two will wear each other out.

Also, he seems to be drinking more than eating.  Would you mind if I started introducing a few new things here and there, so that he gets the hang of it?  Once he's fully on solids, I promise he will sleep through most nights, if not all.

tawillers

Excellent suggestions, nico.  Now to find my balls to actually say that to her.  She's a skittish one, so I'm not sure how she would react.

*Barbie*

Tell gig Kid's mom that he needs Stage 1 food - he's choking on what she's supplying. This is a safety concern for you. (imagine if he *did* choke and had to go to the hospital or something - not sure the legal arrangement you have with this woman, but she could easily sue you)

I'd also tell the woman about your cocerns on development and that she might want to talk to her doctor. you spend more time with the kid than her and can track his behavior better.

"Mom, Please bring kid stage 1 baby food. I cannot feed him stage 3 as it is too thinck and he is choking on it. Starting tomorrow I will not feed him stage 3 out of concern for his safety. Also, i have noticed that kid seems to have trouble with (activity) - you might want to bring this up with pedi, because at this age, it might be a sign of another issue."

GBCK

damnit, computer ate this response too.

That sucks.
THe last time I was concnerned...well, nephew is autistic.

Is there anyone else you can drag into this?  to help or be objective?  nurse?  sundayschool teacher?  SOMEONE else who sees gigkid?

Otherwise, yeah, Ms. Leg is the way to go.
andplusoh, yes to the 'no stage 3.  won't do it' push.

NOLABridesmaid

I don't know much about babies, but it does seem like he has some delays that should be looked at. Maybe they have and don't like the answers they have received.