f/u to Dear Amy in hmo's post

zsazsa-stl

Would you allow your 18 year old child's girl/boyfriend move in with you?  If so, would you allow them to share a room?

DG1

I can only think of a very few circumstances in which I would do that, but I'd never say never.

But no, they would not be allowed to share a room. They can sneak around just like the rest of us.

6fsn

Nope.  There may be a case where I would help them get an apt, but no way would they live under my roof.

zsazsa-stl

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_fu-dear-amy-hmos-post?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:9993e8f8-ef29-4165-b0ba-2a10025a619ePost:211e6165-552e-4edd-be8c-74de9b08d525">Re: f/u to Dear Amy in hmo's post</a>:
[QUOTE]I can only think of a very few circumstances in which I would do that, but I'd never say never. But no, they would not be allowed to share a room. <strong>They can sneak around just like the rest of us.
</strong>Posted by DG1[/QUOTE]

I 1000% agree.  Shame is healthy!  Let your kids rebel with sex rather than with killing homeless people.

nicoleg1982

My sister at 16 used to go stay at her b/f's overnight.  I judged the hell out of that.  Yet somehow, I'm the one with the unplanned pregnancy baby.

baconsmom

I wouldn't be chuffed about room-sharing, but if they're 18 and they want to live together, they can get an apartment like the grownups they are. Or they can pay me rent/utilities/chip in for groceries. I'm only obligated to support my own kids. 

loveshine1

I agree that there are few circumstances where I would allow this.

blush64

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_fu-dear-amy-hmos-post?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:9993e8f8-ef29-4165-b0ba-2a10025a619ePost:9d020d50-eadb-4a5a-bde1-7ebeacd4cafa">f/u to Dear Amy in hmo's post</a>:
[QUOTE]Would you allow your 18 year old child's girl/boyfriend move in with you?  If so, would you allow them to share a room?
Posted by zsazsa-stl[/QUOTE]

Move in--depends on the circumstances. My parents allowed my sister's boyfriend to move in when his father kicked him out and his mother him as a young child. (he was actually almost 17 at the time) He had his own room.

Share a room---NO, not ever. This is just too much. I don't want my kids sharing a room with the opposite sex when they are unmarried. I don't care if they are having sex or not, it's not happening in my house. (that I'm aware of) My fiance and I do not share a room when he is at my parents home. (and I am well over 18)

<strong>EDITED to clarify</strong>, I don't want my kids to share a room in my home with a girlfriend/boyfriend until they are married.  I prefer them to wait until marriage for sex but at the same time I accept that probably won't happen so I don't care that they might decide to live their lives differently....just not under my roof.  If they get to be 35 years old I may have a different opinion but right now they are still young.

hmonkey

share a room?  hells to the no.

move in?  i'd consider it under very special circumstances, mostly involving hoarding and ability to contribute to housebound obesity.

ReturnOfKuus

This:

" I don't want my kids sharing a room with the opposite sex when they are unmarried."

is crazy.  But so is letting your kid's teenage bf/gf move in.

blush64

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_fu-dear-amy-hmos-post?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:9993e8f8-ef29-4165-b0ba-2a10025a619ePost:4c6b78a3-c569-4c31-a2a4-780a3099eb23">Re: f/u to Dear Amy in hmo's post</a>:
[QUOTE]This: " I don't want my kids sharing a room with the opposite sex when they are unmarried." is crazy.  But so is letting your kid's teenage bf/gf move in.
Posted by ReturnOfKuus[/QUOTE]

EDITED
Crazy is different to different people I suppose. I don't think it's crazy to prefer my kids wait until marriage. I am fully aware this probably won't happen and I have fully prepared them for the real world. I can still have my preferences. Do I care if they decide ot have sex, not really, I just think it would be better for them. <strong>(I am finding it hard to explain)</strong>

I accept my kids will have sex and probably before they are married BUT it doesn't have to happen under my roof while I know about it.  I believe it is best to wait until marriage or until you are an adult capable of making adult decisions before having sex.  Will anyone wait? I have no idea.

Opposite sex meaning  their boyfriend or girlfriend.