Wedding Woes

Weddig ceremony without parents...? HELP!!

 I'm getting ready to plan a wedding (without a wedding planner because of budget...).I can't seem to get any help online on how to do a rehearsal dinner, ceremony, and reception, without the bride's parents attending. Not to mention how all these toasts and things can go..Can anyone help me, or give me any ideas on what to do? How can I plan a ceremony and do programs and things like that...?

Re: Weddig ceremony without parents...? HELP!!

  • Well nothing changes whether they attend or don't attend.  You find a ceremony and reception venue and book it.  Pick out invitations and word them as coming from you and your FI, not your parents.  Pick your colors and flowers and attire, your bridal party, etc.  Plan your rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.

    I would start by reading stuff here on the Knot.  Use the knot checklist to keep you on track.   It sounds like you're just looking for wedding planning advice in general, and this the site for it, so go to the main Knot page and just start reading.
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  • I agree with PP.  As far as things like toasts go - it sounds like you're worrying about stuff that parents normally do, but these things are optional.  At the RD you can have other family members do toasts, or no toasts at all.  For our wedding, we actually don't have any toasts 'planned' - if people want to say something, they can, but we're not asking anyone to do it and we're not scheduling it in.  I guess that depends on how formal your reception and RD are, but regardless, parents aren't the only people that can toast. 

    You'll be fine not having parent dances, or walking down the aisle by yourself, lots of people do it.  When you get further along in planning, post more specific questions on TK.  For example, once you start designing programs, post your ideas and ask for help with the specific wording you're having trouble with. Breathe, it will be ok!
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  • Ok, start with deciding a plan. What kind of ceremony do you want? Do you want a church ceremony, or something in nature, or lake side, or sea side, or in a garden?

    Next decide on a reception site. Bonus points if it's all in one place,  it's less to pay in venue fees.

    Next decide how many people you'll be inviting.

    Then find a venue that will fit that number of people (regardless of if they come or not) and that's in your price range.

    Next choose a menu. It doesn't have to be complex. The venue may have a caterer on site, or have a list of preferred caterers. Try out the food, decide on the menu. If you're on a budget, IMO the easiest thing to do is find a place that is already decorated as-is (like a garden) so that you have only a minimal amount of decorations to buy. Flowers are expensive, candles are not. FYI.

    Once you have that set you can get into specifics, like dresses, colors/themes for the wedding/invitations

    You don't need a lot of crap people try to push on you, like programs. Seriously, if the people don't know who is getting married or the general idea of how a wedding works you probably sent their invite to 1212 Underarock Ln.

    You don't need monogrammed napkins, or expensive favors with your names on them, they're just going to be thrown away. If you want to do a favor, I'd suggest either food (a candy buffet is always cute) or a donation to a charity of your choice, with a printed somethingorother letting your guests know in lieu of favors you donated to the National Kidney Foundation, or whatever you want to do.
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  • To back up PP regarding programs, I'm not doing them, for whatever that's worth.
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