Father-in-law decline wedding invite?!?!

white_jenn

My future father in law just informed my fiance that if we do not invite the father in laws sister to the wedding, that we should not invite him as well.  I have been with my fiance for 13 years and I have never met this woman, EVER. Why would I invite her?!?!  It is so childish, selfish and hurtful.  Those words can never be taken back.  What am I to say the next time we meet? What suportive words can I share with my fiance other than we will still invite him and let him choose?

RiRi157

It's childish, selfish and hurtful of you to not invite your FFILs sister.
Next time you meet you can say I was out of line and and I'm sorry.
To your Fi you can say I understand she is your aunt and we will invite her.


 Grow up it's still your Fi family would you do this to YOUR father...

flower_diva

one more person at your reception to keep the peace in the family for the rest of your marriage?       you choose     no,it's not right that your father in law is being so stinky about this.....but it's all about compromise not who is wrong or right. I would also think this would fall under the FI's invites for his side of the family.

blush64

I would just invite her if my FI wanted to but I would have a hard time the next time I was around my future father-in-law.  I think it's a really childish thing for him to do. Just be the bigger person.

CassieeK

Just invite her. You are going to cause bigger, long-term problems for your family if you don't. 

VarunaTT

So, your FIs aunt?  Right?

Hell, I'd invite her.  That falls w/in the immediate family definition for me.  What does FI say?  Why doesn't he want his aunt there?

Queen Jane

I fail to see the problem with inviting the aunt, unless you're wedding is extremely small, like parents and siblings only. It's not uncommon to invite extended family. I haven't met most of FI's mom's side, but they are still invited. It's a big day for his parents too, just keep that in mind. His attitude sounds like it does suck. Is anyone else in his dad's family invited?

zitiqueen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_father-law-decline-wedding-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:b971b074-7f59-44fc-b2f6-5bbec8aa96d3Post:8c157469-a585-46de-b7fb-7b4e7ca00770">Father-in-law decline wedding invite?!?!</a>:
[QUOTE]My future father in law just informed my fiance that if we do not invite the father in laws sister to the wedding, that we should not invite him as well.  I have been with my fiance for 13 years and I have never met this woman, EVER. Why would I invite her?!?!  It is so childish, selfish and hurtful.  Those words can never be taken back.  What am I to say the next time we meet? What suportive words can I share with my fiance other than we will still invite him and let him choose?
Posted by white_jenn[/QUOTE]

DaydreamBride730

I'd have to agree- just swallow your pride and invite her. Chances are, if you haven't met her in 13 years, she might not even come to the wedding anyway. It's not worth a lifetime of resentment from your finace's stepfather.

mrshellem2012

I would not invite her, who the hell is this guy to give you an ultimatum like that? thats crap, there are different ways he can handle the situation rather than throwing a tantrum and being stubborn.
 I agree with you, dont invite her (if you really dont want to) also since you have never met. If he chooses not to attend than he obviously didnt want to come that much in the first place. RIDICULOUS... Good Luck Bride2B

DG1

Let your FI make this call.  No, this instance is not a big deal, but I wouldn't set the precedent that it's OK for your FIL to say what you can and can't do with your own lives. (Caveat: If he is contributing financially to the wedding, he does get some say in the invite list. Generally speaking, he would have some invite input regardless.)