Wedding Woes
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How should I ask?

My Step-Sister is getting married in April. My dad asked if I was going to the wedding. I told him I had no idea she was getting married but of course I will. After putting in some though, my dad's side of the family is a bit different than my mom's where you just invite yourself and every single 3rd cousin is "of course" invited. The last time I talked to my Step-Sister is probably 5 years ago when I last visited my dad. My question is, is it ok for me to approach her and ask if I'm invited or just wait to see if I get an invitation? What if she's not sending any invitations? When I ask my dad for details he just says "I don't know anything, my opinion doesn't matter" ... obviously a bit hurt by not being included ... but anyway ... would it be proper for me to ask her the details? How should I go about doing it? I only have her and her future husbands email address. Thank you!!!

Re: How should I ask?

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    6fsn6fsn member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I'd wait for an invite. 

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    Butter CookieButter Cookie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Maybe you could just make contact with her and congratulate her on the engagement and tell her you're happy for her? That's an odd situation, but I understand. H's family is one of those "of course everyone who is family is invited" families which is super weird to me, and I feel weird when H's parents tell us we're going to X event which we weren't expressly invited to. (I've had it work out both ways, too)

    Just make contact with her. Email her and ask her how she's doing, catch up, and go from there. I wouldn't out-and-out ask, I'd wait for an invite (either a physical invitation or a verbal) so you don't run the risk of crashing a party you weren't invited to.
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    mrsconn23mrsconn23 member
    First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I'd wait for an invite, but there's nothing stopping you from doing what BC suggested and reaching out to congratulate her.  But if you haven't seen her in five years, I would not get your hopes up for an invite.
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    DankamieDankamie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Great, thank you for your suggestions. I'll go ahead and email her to congratulate her and like you all said ... wait for the invite.


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    DankamieDankamie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    ... well, I emailed my step-sister to ask how her wedding planning was going and asked if Dad had told her that Dan and I are getting married next year. No reply. My Dad hasn't called me to make sure were coming. We're down to her wedding being in 2 weekends so I'm now assuming that either A. She didn't send out invites or B. She hasn't invited my Fiance and I.

    I don't really want to call my dad ... the last time I talked to him was when I told him I got engaged and he said "well ... ain't that special ..." with dollar signs running through his mind, I'm sure. Shocked, I tried to continue on with the conversation another few minutes and he started arguing with me about computers (which is something he knows nothing about and its my job to train adult learners about computers) and I said we were about to go through tunnels and might get disconnected. Not even a minute later I hung up on him and haven't talked to him since. It's been almost 4 months.

    I lost my job 2 weeks ago so needless to say, I'm a bit relieved that I didn't get an invite or a follow up phone call from my Dad.

    Thanks for the advice ladies.  :)

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    Butter CookieButter Cookie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Sorry you lost your job, I hope you find another one soon.
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    DankamieDankamie member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Thanks BC! I decided to take a few months off and work on my wedding. I saved up some money while at my last job so I wont need to apply for unemployement or anything. Very relieved.
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