Invitation Issue

leahautumn

So my fiance and I are in a pickle...

We sent our invitations out stating "Adult reception only", however, there are children that we would like to invite (cousins, etc.). We specifically printed their names on the outer and inner envelopes if they were invited. A family member received the invitation and is extremely angry because she thinks that her children are not invited. Although their names are on the invitation, she believes they are not invited. Now her and her family are not coming to the wedding. My fiance spoke with her husband today to explain the situation and to make sure they know the children are invited. Should I make a phone call to them as well? What should I do?

**O-Face**

His phone call is enough.  If they want to throw a tantrum, let them. 

Also---change your name.  That is all.

baconsmom

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_invitation-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:c50f61a8-6a9b-4a79-bd46-ad6098d26638Post:df69b12c-7f16-48e4-ae32-f73a152bbd08">Invitation Issue</a>:
[QUOTE]So my fiance and I are in a pickle... We sent our invitations out stating "Adult reception only", however, there are children that we would like to invite (cousins, etc.). We specifically printed their names on the outer and inner envelopes if they were invited. A family member received the invitation and is extremely angry because she thinks that her children are not invited. Although their names are on the invitation, she believes they are not invited. Now her and her family are not coming to the wedding. My fiance spoke with her husband today to explain the situation and to make sure they know the children are invited. Should I make a phone call to them as well? What should I do?
Posted by leahautumn@gmail.com[/QUOTE]

<div>This is why you never print anything like "adult reception only" on the invitations. You should have invited whom you wanted, and then called people who added uninvited guests. </div><div>
</div><div>Your fiance already called. It's taken care of. In the future, you should perhaps look up the etiquette *before* you print and send an invitation. </div>

mrsconn23

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_invitation-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:c50f61a8-6a9b-4a79-bd46-ad6098d26638Post:df69b12c-7f16-48e4-ae32-f73a152bbd08">Invitation Issue</a>:
[QUOTE]So my fiance and I are in a pickle... We sent our invitations out stating "Adult reception only", however, there are children that we would like to invite (cousins, etc.). We specifically printed their names on the outer and inner envelopes if they were invited. A family member received the invitation and is extremely angry because she thinks that her children are not invited. Although their names are on the invitation, she believes they are not invited. Now her and her family are not coming to the wedding. My fiance spoke with her husband today to explain the situation and to make sure they know the children are invited. Should I make a phone call to them as well? What should I do?
Posted by leahautumn@gmail.com[/QUOTE]

First of all, using your email adderss as your handle is never a good idea.  You should probably change it.

Second, is it an adult only reception or not?  It's either all or nothing.   It's tacky and rude to selectively invite children.  I can see how your guests would be confused and/or angry.

*Barbie*

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_invitation-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:c50f61a8-6a9b-4a79-bd46-ad6098d26638Post:df69b12c-7f16-48e4-ae32-f73a152bbd08">Invitation Issue</a>:
[QUOTE]So my fiance and I are in a pickle... We sent our invitations out stating "Adult reception only", however, there are children that we would like to invite (cousins, etc.). We specifically printed their names on the outer and inner envelopes if they were invited. A family member received the invitation and is extremely angry because she thinks that her children are not invited. Although their names are on the invitation, she believes they are not invited. Now her and her family are not coming to the wedding. <strong>My fiance spoke with her husband today to explain the situation and to make sure they know the children are invited. </strong>Should I make a phone call to them as well? What should I do?
Posted by leahautumn@gmail.com[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>you are a moron. "adult reception only" means "no children."</div><div>
</div><div>why would you have invites printed with "adults only" if you intended to invite kids?</div><div>
</div><div>how in the world did your FI "explain the situation"?</div><div>
</div>

baconsmom

"Hi, Family Member. Just calling to let you know that Bride is a moron who insisted on printing "Adult reception" on the invitations, even though she knew she wanted to invite kids. So, good news? Your kids made the cut! Bad news? I'm stuck with this dumb ass for 50 years!"

hmonkey

i think it's far more rude to recieve an invitation and to try to dictate the terms to the hose.  just decline and move on.

baconsmom

You're right, H, of course, but - I'd be pretty damn confused by that invitation, and I don't actually trust this poster to have the right of the relative's actual complaint. 

*Barbie*

I agree with you H, but I have a feeling the Aunt called to find out if the kids were actually invited, not because she was pissed that they weren't. 

hmonkey

in conclusion, for those of you keeping score --

rude: bride
ruder: aunt

stupid: aunt
stupider: bride

clarity of thought, speech and written word: neither

leahautumn

I don't consider a 19 year old and 20 year old a child, which is why they were invited. They were also invited because they are 1st cousins. We have friends that have 3 and 4 kids under the age of 8, which is why I printed Adult Reception on the invite. I've looked up etiquette on many websites and I don't understand what is so confusing when their names on on the invitation. Just wanted some friendly advice on whether or not I should make an additional call, that's all.

Also, I've tried changing my name, but I can't because the account is already created. I would have to create another account. 

katorigasuki

why did you make this more confusing than it needed to be.  if you want an adult only reception, you don't make exceptions for kids.


ETA: also, if you did look up the ettique for addressing invites, you would know that anyone over 18 gets their own invite.