Wedding Woes

Grateful for my blessings

I'm am going to accept what is

Future Mr. + Mrs. White

Re: Grateful for my blessings

  • I think taking out a loan to pay for a wedding just isn't a wise decision. I understand you wanting that special day with friends and family but you are just going to need to scale back and plan for what you can afford when April 2011 rolls around.  As much as losing your money sucks recognize that it enabled you brother to get the help he needs/needed and this could be a blessing in disguise.  Scale back, have a cake and punch reception at a cheaper location, or limit guests to family and close friends only.

    I really don't recommend taking out a loan to pay for one day. Loans are for houses, cars, emergencies, etc. not for an event.
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  • ManwaithielManwaithiel member
    First Comment
    edited August 2010
    Please, please, pretty please do not take out a loan. You will need that borrowing power for something more permanent (i.e. cars, houses, etc.)

    This is a really awful situation and I'm so sorry this has happened to you.

    Go to your local wedding board. Explain your situation and see if you can find a beautiful venue that's a lot less. Perhaps consider having a small intimate ceremony. We're getting married in the Botanical Gardens in our area and I know it's like $200 to have a ceremony with less than 30 people. If you're doing it at your church, I suppose this isn't really an issue. But follow the insturctions above for your reception venue.

    Then get on every DIY wedding site you can imagine and the DIY boards here. I would pay for photographers and catering. But everything else you could most likely do yourself on the cheap. You could even bake the cake if you're that bound and determined. Enlist your willing friends and family to help you prep for the wedding.

    And always remember that you are marrying the man of your dreams and that's all that really matters in the end.

    Really, I will put you in my prayers tonight. You sound like you could use them.

    God bless you and I hope this helps.
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  • Why in the hell were you saving money in a box instead of in a bank?

    Postpone the wedding until you can save up again. And this time put your money someplace safe.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_very-sad-need-of-advice?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:dcd1b8d6-0a8e-4be1-9748-a7c9e7bb5a0bPost:30e54475-2c1f-42f6-a27d-d62d18e97759">very sad and in need of some advice</a>:
    [QUOTE]Well here is my issue, and I hope I can recieve some helpful advice on what to do.  My Fiance Ryan and I have amazing parents on both sides, they are extremely supportive only they are struggling financially, so neither side was able to afford to help us with paying for our wedding.

    My father had a liver transplant 2 years ago and now is in need for a kidney.  Dialysis treatments are helping him get by until we get his health good enough to qualify to be on a transplant list.  Unfortuanately this has been a financial burden on the family and has prevented my parents to help me out.  

    So for the last year and a half, we both have been putting money away in a box to save up for our wedding.  We were one week away from having the money we needed for the amazing venue we both fell in love with when something disappointing had happened.  My money was missing.  Ryan was very upset when I told him, and we both were confused what had happened.

     I asked my parents and siblings and they all had no clue what I was talking about.  Everyone questioned how I could possibly lose such a large amount in as little as a week.  Well a week later of crying constantly and confusion, I get even more bad news. 

    My 15 year old brother had drug over dosed and had been rushed to the hospital to get his stomach pumped.  Ryan and I rush to the ER , shocked, because my little brother has never striked either of us to be involved in drugs.  Thank God he didnt lose his life.  We have a heart to heart with him, asking him why he would do this to his body, and what was he thinking and he told us he has had a habit for months and has hidden it from the family.  He then cries and tells me hes sorry for the pain he has put Ryan and I through and that he had stolen our venue deposit to pay back people he had gotten drugs from.  He said he was scared and didnt know what else to do.  He has been going to rehab classes sucessfully for a month now, and hopefully will continue to stay clean , however now, Ryan and I are still in a bad position. 

    Our wedding is planned for April 22nd, 2011, and we have nothing to make this wedding happen.  We have to start from scratch.  We tried to get a loan and no banks will approve us since we have little credit history.  I don't know what to do and wondered if anyone knew of any banks or companies that give couples loans to pay for their weddings.  Id appreciate some helpful advice! Thank you to anyone who took the time to read this!!! God Bless!
    Posted by Miriam29[/QUOTE]

    I'm so sorry this has happened to you. You may need to put off your wedding for another year or two. I would talk to your little brother and let him know as part of his treatment he needs to get a job (mowing lawns, whatever) and pay you back. I mean, this would have been so much worse for him if he had had to go to juvenile hall, and people *should* pay for their crimes.

    In the mean time you two can continue to work on raising money. You need to open a bank and put the money there, secure, in a savings account. Unfortunately even though we love and want to trust our families it's just safer and smarter to keep it in a bank. Think of it this way - if the house had burned to the ground, you would have lost your money anyway.
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