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Crazy future relatives critiquing my Shower Thank you cards, gr.

ooodsieooodsie
2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
in Pennsylvania-Philadelphia
FMIL sends me an email, "Marie got a thank you card but you didn't mention the spices or salad spinner, also you didn't send seperate cards to her daughters Erika and Tammy" ... okay so 1. I mentioned the bakeware and toaster which were the bigger items in the gift.  I did that for everyone if they gave multiple gifts, instead of itemizing I generalized.  I THOUGHT it was more important to thank them for coming, meeting them for the first time, etc.   Didnt know the itemized gifts were more important.  2.  She wants seperate cards for her daughters who went in on the gift with her, from the SAME address, who all gave me the same gift and card..... Instead of sending multiples, I sent one card to the mom, and addressed all 3 of them on/in it.  Why the heck do they all need seperate cards?    Okay so.. are they crazy, or am I?  Just never had someone critique how you do thank you cards so heavily.  I almost think FMIL shoudlnt even have told me, and just told the woman (who is her cousin) to shut up and quit being stupid!  LOL.
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Re: Crazy future relatives critiquing my Shower Thank you cards, gr.

  • ValAndRyanValAndRyan
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Yeah, that's not good. I would just write back, "thank you for your input and it's taken care of".
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  • mas687mas687
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Eck! Reminds me of Marie in Everybody Loves Raymond. I have no tolerance for nit-picky things like that. "Its the thought that counts" kinda goes both ways. My gmom asked my mom if she wasn't invited to my shower, simply bc she hadn't received the invite the same day as other fam. The BM's sent them out (we didnt even know when they were sent) and they went out in 2 batches.
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  • Kernel14Kernel14 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I would have done the same thing you did. And I did do that. If they were all at one address and all gave me one card I would send one thank you. There is no need to send the three of them their own. Thats stupid. I probably just wouldn't write back at all. I'd tell FI and let him tell his mom to buzz off.
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  • jewels2730jewels2730
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'm a biatch, so I would probably write her back very condescendingly with a "Oh, I am so sorry but I've talked to many people to find out the etiquette with thank you cards to make sure I was doing the proper thing, and it's always you thank for the larger gifts and thank them for coming, yada yada... and always one card for a household."  I would just make it seem like you are right, they are wrong and they are idiots for complaining and she's an idiot for even bothering you with it.     
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  • tracyd21tracyd21 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    You are not crazy - but I think some of you future relatives might be :) I did the same as you - same household, same card. If you thank all parties involved and mention the big items, you should be fine! Case closed.
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  • anniegirl1anniegirl1
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    This would totally annoy me and I can totally see it happening to me.  The pathetic part is that people are discussing what you wrote in your thank you cards.  It's like, find something better to do people!
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  • jessica0602jessica0602 member
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    send her a thank you card thanking her for her email.
    Not So Iron Chef
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  • ValAndRyanValAndRyan
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Oh and make sure you have your fi send out thank you cards to his side so his own mom can critique him if she'd like.
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  • ooodsieooodsie
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    LOL i should of had him write them to his family.. that would of been a better idea, HA.   So I wrote back to his mom explaining that I mentioned the "big" items not every itemized thing, and also that I sent one card per family in the same household.  She wrote back acknowledling that this particular relative is a little particular and "it would go a long way to smoothing things over if I sent seperate cards to her daughters" ... GR!!   So I guess I'm sucking it up and sending new cards out!  and I laughed outloud when I read that I had to "smooth things over" .. now I can only picture the conversation his mom had with the cousin .. "OMG who is this girl Ben is marrying? Can you BELIEVE she sent one card to all three of us and didnt even mention the spice rack!?? THE NERVE"  hahaha... Oh god.. Kill me now. 
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  • ValAndRyanValAndRyan
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    You are a better person than I am!
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  • CA2PABride2BeCA2PABride2Be member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    There's going to be lots of things about your in-laws that irritate you since all families are different.  Just let it blow over and don't even bother responding to her.
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  • blacksredblacksred member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    umm this may be childish but all three of them only gave YOU one card! lol
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