wedding planning with a sick parent/relative

bumblebee1234

Ok this might be a bit of a heavy topic but many of you may share this commonaility. Are you planning a wedding along with having a sick person who is close to you and obviously important to you? My wedding is in a week and a half and we are in the final stages of details. My mom is chronically ill with cancer and is physically disabled. That has been a source of obvious stress for me throughout the wedding process because I've tried to involve her as much as I can. Due to her and my father's financial situation and her health situation, they haven't been able to participate in much of the planning at all. It's not even about that, it's rather the guilt and worry that comes along with trying to make sure she is comfortable at the wedding. As we all know, weddings bring up issues of all colors and it just reflects my deeper concern and worry about her health situation, my dad caring for her (I live out of state) and trying to begin my life with my soon to be husband. Does anyone have any advice on how to navigage these type of situations?

MNNEBride

I don't.  If you have specific concerns, we might be able to help you with those.

Butter Cookie

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_wedding-planning-sick-parentrelative?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:ebe67869-a35b-42f4-99a8-f83cef278e26Post:1ec0fb62-a59e-41d6-ba5a-e3c218484254">wedding planning with a sick parent/relative</a>:
[QUOTE]Ok this might be a bit of a heavy topic but many of you may share this commonaility. Are you planning a wedding along with having a sick person who is close to you and obviously important to you? My wedding is in a week and a half and we are in the final stages of details. My mom is chronically ill with cancer and is physically disabled. That has been a source of obvious stress for me throughout the wedding process because I've tried to involve her as much as I can. Due to her and my father's financial situation and her health situation, they haven't been able to participate in much of the planning at all. It's not even about that, it's rather the guilt and worry that comes along with trying to make sure she is comfortable at the wedding. As we all know, weddings bring up issues of all colors and it just reflects my deeper concern and worry about her health situation, my dad caring for her (I live out of state) and trying to begin my life with my soon to be husband. Does anyone have any advice on how to navigage these type of situations?
Posted by bumblebee1234[/QUOTE]

Well, it's nice that you're concerned for you Mom's comfort. There's nothing more you can really do so close to the wedding. Enjoy the day, tell your Mom you love her, make sure the photographer gets some great pictures of her and of the two of you together.

Up until the wedding just try to relax. Have a glass of wine, get a massage, write in a journal - find a way to chill out, because there's nothing you can do to change your circumstances, and wallowing in guilt isn't going to help anybody, to be honest. Also, talk to your soon-to-be-husband about your concerns. It might help to have an ear, even if there's nothing he can do to help the situation.

ReturnOfKuus

I know it's hard, but try to have a good time, and take lots of pictures of her and with her.