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Am I coldhearted and alone?

A woman on my month board started a FFFC post and simply typed BFP in the message.

She has a 9 month old with her drug addict exbf who is supposedly getting so much better.  She talks about hanging out with him on occasion and having sex with him in moments of weakness. ETA:  I'm only assuming this is the father.

She hasn't followed up on how she's feeling about the pregnancy but people are congratulating her and telling her babies are a blessing.

She works nights and her elderly father watches her 9 mo.  I'm not seeing the blessing in this situation.

Re: Am I coldhearted and alone?

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    It doesn't sound like a good situation, but what else do you tell someone at that point?  That they should give their child up?  That they should have had an abortion?

    I have a tendency to be a heartless bitch in situations like that, but it sounds like she might just need someone to listen while she talks.  She might not have a great support system in her friend group.

    I french with my man
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_am-i-coldhearted-and-alone?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:f06f2974-7aef-4134-9c7f-9e37a0684d81Post:6fda2e5f-c177-4e42-929d-d868c1a943f6">Re: Am I coldhearted and alone?</a>:
    [QUOTE]It doesn't sound like a good situation, but <strong>what else do you tell someone at that point?</strong>  That they should give their child up?  That they should have had an abortion? I have a tendency to be a heartless bitch in situations like that, but it sounds like she might just need someone to listen while she talks.  She might not have a great support system in her friend group.
    Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

    Yeah, you have a point.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_am-i-coldhearted-and-alone?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:f06f2974-7aef-4134-9c7f-9e37a0684d81Post:6fda2e5f-c177-4e42-929d-d868c1a943f6">Re: Am I coldhearted and alone?</a>:
    [QUOTE]It doesn't sound like a good situation, but what else do you tell someone at that point?  That they should give their child up?  That they should have had an abortion?
    Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

    Both are better pieces of advice than saying that this is a blessing, IMO.
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    DG1DG1 member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_am-i-coldhearted-and-alone?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:f06f2974-7aef-4134-9c7f-9e37a0684d81Post:6fda2e5f-c177-4e42-929d-d868c1a943f6">Re: Am I coldhearted and alone?</a>:
    [QUOTE]It doesn't sound like a good situation, but what else do you tell someone at that point?  <strong>That they should give their child up?  That they should have had an abortion?</strong> I have a tendency to be a heartless bitch in situations like that, but it sounds like she might just need someone to listen while she talks.  She might not have a great support system in her friend group.
    Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

    YES! I certainly think the former is the preferable option, but both of these seem like better outcomes for all involved, including the child.

    image
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    Ditto the noob It's just a platitude for an awkward situation when your opinion isn't even relevant or warranted.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_am-i-coldhearted-and-alone?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:f06f2974-7aef-4134-9c7f-9e37a0684d81Post:46d26ce4-eeed-464b-a665-45dba1c82da0">Re:Am I coldhearted and alone?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Ditto the noob It's just a platitude for an awkward situation when your opinion isn't even relevant or warranted.
    Posted by dharmabunny[/QUOTE]

    This.
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    Yes both are better pieces of advice, but unsolicited advice in such a situation never goes off well.
    I french with my man
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    This is when you just say, "Ok."
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