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Wedding Woes

Asking family to drive 9 hours?

My wedding is over a year off yet and I'm already feeling a bit cornered by family. My FI and I met in college... while attending scool in 2 different states. He lives in Michigan (half his family is in Minnesota) and most of mine is in the St. Louis area. It's about a 8 1/2 - 9 hour drive, which we have no problem doing for each other obviously... but I'm worried for family it might be another story.

Either way, one of our families is going to have to make the commute. I feel myself getting tense whenever a family member asked, "So where are you two gonna get married?" My aunt was jokingly suggesting (or somewhat hinting) that we should meet somewhere in between, which while a nice compromise, makes the wedding planning really difficult for us, since we'd both have to commute. And I'll be living in the Boston as of this September for graduate school, so frequent trips to the Midwest aren't not really ideal.

My FI and I were kind of hoping to get married in Ann Arbor, MI. Gorgeous area, we know a couple who found a beautiful venue there, and mostly because my FI can browse venues at his conveniene since he'll be right there (finshing his last year of school).

I just don't know how to break it to my family that they may be the ones having to travel and have them thinking his family is just taking the easy way out or something. I know I should probably just suck it up and tell them, but I'm not sure how to yet. Any advice?


Re: Asking family to drive 9 hours?

  • ReturnOfKuusReturnOfKuus member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Plan the wedding for Boston and make them all travel.  Problem solved.
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  • MrsMyrtleMrsMyrtle member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    If they want to be there, they'll be there. Have the wedding where you want it and then let your guests decide if they'll come.
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  • TheDuckisTheDuckis member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    You're not going to be able to make everyone happy, so do whatever makes you happy. If your family wants to be there they will be.
  • loveshine1loveshine1 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Over half of our guests were from OOT. The ones that could show up did. The rest didn't.

    Don't stress too much, and remember you're not going to please everyone. Do it where you want it and where it's most convenient for you.
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  • edited December 2011
    Kuus: Ha! While I'd love to I wouldn't be that cruel. And I do want as many of our guests to be able to attend as possible. P.S. I LOVE that rabbit pic. Adorable.

    Myrtle & Duckis: I agree with both of you. I feel like if my family really cares they'll make the trip. I just have to deal with a little grumbling at first, but they'll get over it. This is how I kinda felt, I just wanted to hear it from someone else. Thanks! :)
  • hmonkeyhmonkey member
    Ninth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011

    if they want to, they will.

    no one wants to drive 9 hours; they will fly.  detroit metro to ann arbor is not that bad.

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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_asking-family-drive-9-hours?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:f4d421a0-9646-4d1f-8868-81ca1de70557Post:b706f946-99cb-4e6a-bbf6-43347e9a392a">Re: Asking family to drive 9 hours?</a>:
    [QUOTE]if they want to, they will. no one wants to drive 9 hours; they will fly.  detroit metro to ann arbor is not that bad.
    Posted by hmonkey[/QUOTE]
    For sure. Ha, imagining my family trying to navigate the metro is quite the funny mental picture. But you're right, those who want to be there will endure it. And hey, I won't be offended if every aunt/uncle/cousin isn't there. I know the ones I most care about will be.
  • hmonkeyhmonkey member
    Ninth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    [QUOTE] I know the ones I most care about will be.
    Posted by stephdonjon[/QUOTE]

    no, the ones who want to go and can do so will be there, not just the ones you care about.
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