"Do I have to have her as a flower girl?"

meladona2012

My mother wants me to include my cousin's 1 y.o. daughter as a flower girl at my wedding in September 2013. By that time she will be a little over 2 and will probably be every where else except where she needs to be. The thing is, my cousin and I have not been close for over 12 years and don't want to feel obligated to include her daughter in my entourage (which I already have 7 kids) or forced to include anyone because of obligation. Mother continues to fight me for it. Kinda torn!

 How to deal?

-M

SB1512

Don't ask her if you don't want to her have in the wedding.  Regardless of who is paying for the wedding, the choice of who participates and is part of the wedding party is completely up to the bride and groom.  Just tell your mom that the wedding party is already taken care of and change the subject.  Do not let her force you into asking her.

Heffalump

Why does your mother care?  Little kids are unpredictable, and if that's not your thing, then you're going to be really pissed when your flower girl goes off the rails.  Not worth it.  Tell your mother you're not asking cousin's kid to be a flower girl, period, and move on.