So...I'm having anxiety and awful thoughts...

DeanneCW

I have always had awful relationships, the kind that have ended badly. I never thought I was suppose to be happy. Until I met my FI- he's perfect. Now it's getting closer to the wedding and he has to go on a business trip in a few weeks.

I can't stop thinking something will happen to him- I feel like this is just my luck, I've been planning something for so long and I meet the perfect guy for me- naturally something is going to happen to ruin it all.

This isn't the first time I have felt this way- I have been feeling this way throughout our entire engagement and planning stage- I have had thoughts about something happening to him during the winter months, or when he goes in for a checkup at the doctor I feel like they are going to find something.

 It's honestly consuming my life now- I can't wake up happy anymore I don't even want to continue planning the wedding until after he comes back from the business trip.

Does anyone have any feelings like this?

mrsconn23

I think you should make an appointment with your Dr. ASAP.  You shouldn't have to live like this at all.

My DH has anxiety issues and they came to a head right before we got married.  He ended up in the hospital overnight because he had a severe panic attack. 

Good luck.

DeanneCW

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_soim-having-anxiety-awful-thoughts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:f8e0ab09-ffcc-4a80-811c-af690872fc49Post:a7334b92-8e0b-4507-98c8-5c9efb796eba">Re: So...I'm having anxiety and awful thoughts...</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I think you should make an appointment with your Dr. ASAP</strong>.  You shouldn't have to live like this at all. My DH has anxiety issues and they came to a head right before we got married.  He ended up in the hospital overnight because he had a severe panic attack.  Good luck.
Posted by mrs.conn23[/QUOTE]
Thanks, I am going to be making an appt with my FI's therapist while I'm at lunch...

A friend of mine said I should just talk about my problems with the doctor and not ask for any medications or anything, or even if they want to give me a medication I shouldn't take it...

My FI is on meds for anxiety and it's done wonders for him- I don't like to think meds are the answer but I have been dealing with anxiety since highschool- so 15 years now.

*Barbie*

you need to see a mental health professional.

if you have an EAP through work, call them, and they will set you up with a therapist. they can often get you in same day or next day.

unless your friend has a PhD, and has diagnosed you, do not take mental health advice from her. If you see a Doctor, and he wants to medicate you, do what he says.

mrsconn23

What Barbie said.

Your friend needs to STFU.

DeanneCW

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_soim-having-anxiety-awful-thoughts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:f8e0ab09-ffcc-4a80-811c-af690872fc49Post:251e04a2-2865-47bd-bfc7-89eef4f59ff4">Re: So...I'm having anxiety and awful thoughts...</a>:
[QUOTE]What Barbie said. <strong>Your friend needs to STFU.</strong>
Posted by mrs.conn23[/QUOTE]

She's VERY opinionated but yes... she loves giving out medical advice because she works for a Allergy doctor and was an EMT for a year or a little more- a few years back...

I know that doesn't make her NEAR qualified to give any medical advice. But I will be calling the doctor in an hour and see when they can meet with me.

Thanks ladies :)

MinM

You and your doctor should decide what medication, if any, is right for you. Your friend needs to suck it. You may not need meds, but it isn't her place to say so.

GBCK

don't be surprised if the therapist refers you elsewhere.

Many good therapists won't see both halves of a couple; it makes it to ahrd to be neutral.

(my husbands therapist says I can come for any and all appts. to help w/ the Mr's issues--but he won't see us as a couple for couple issues or me for my issues)

and allergists shouldn't be opining on mental health drugs.

DeanneCW

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_soim-having-anxiety-awful-thoughts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:f8e0ab09-ffcc-4a80-811c-af690872fc49Post:f1949a54-99e8-4c60-8e5b-c7d7054989ed">Re: So...I'm having anxiety and awful thoughts...</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>don't be surprised if the therapist refers you elsewhere. Many good therapists won't see both halves of a couple</strong>; it makes it to ahrd to be neutral. (my husbands therapist says I can come for any and all appts. to help w/ the Mr's issues--but he won't see us as a couple for couple issues or me for my issues) and <strong>allergists shouldn't be opining on mental health drugs.</strong>
Posted by GBCK[/QUOTE]


I am not going to let the doctor know that  he/she (i forgot who FI sees) that my FI goes to them- there's no way they would find out unless I out right told them. But we'll see...

My friend isn't even an allergist she answers phones FOR the allergist.....that just adds more to your point lol

GBCK

I'm having a 'record screech' , back the truck up moment here.

You need a therapist.

So you're going to 'lie by omission' to your DH's therapist so they'll be you'r therapist--becaus eyou know it's a bad idea for this person to ALSO be your therapist.  And start out the therapist relationship with complete dishonesty.  As a way of HELPING your issues?

Yeah, don't do that.

Call.  Identify yourself.  Ask if they can see you or refer you.

DeanneCW

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_soim-having-anxiety-awful-thoughts?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:f8e0ab09-ffcc-4a80-811c-af690872fc49Post:cdad3d79-bfa3-420c-ae06-f719038609ab">Re: So...I'm having anxiety and awful thoughts...</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm having a 'record screech' , back the truck up moment here. You need a therapist. So you're going to 'lie by omission' to your DH's therapist so they'll be you'r therapist--becaus eyou know it's a bad idea for this person to ALSO be your therapist.  And start out the therapist relationship with complete dishonesty.  As a way of HELPING your issues? Yeah, don't do that. Call.  Identify yourself.  Ask if they can see you or refer you.
Posted by GBCK[/QUOTE]


I just called his therapist and they no longer have late night weekend times- so I have to find another one.

ElasticCassidy

I worry like this. 

Then again, I was diagnosed long ago with anxiety, You should take meds if you need them. But for me, just having somebody explain to me that this is just anxiety helps me. Whenever I get too freaked I can just tell myself, you have an anxiety condition, this fear isn't real or grounded, be rational. It helps me calm down a lot. 

It also helps that FI has panic problems, so he gets what I'm going through and we make a really good support system.