let me preface this by saying I love my in-laws. They're both wonderful and giving and loving people.
However all the men in H's family have this tone. It's the kind of tone where for no apparent reason you're suddenly the dumbest, most annoying and useless sack of dirt who ever walked the face of the earth. I truly believe none of them realize they're doing it, because my immediate reaction is to mimic H's tone back to him, which makes him go, "WTF IS YOUR PROBLEM?"
^^because I put a stop to this as soon as it starts we don't have much of a problem except when he spends a lot of time around his brothers or Dad.
H's Dad is so much worse than H and his brothers though. Maybe because MIL hasn't stopped him, being the passive person she is, or maybe because he's partially deaf from all the years he worked near heavy machinery and truly can't hear the tone.
But when he uses it on her I want to hit him. Actual fisticuffs.
But to make matters worse FIL is constantly accusing MIL of moving around his stuff. I stay out of their bickering, because - you know - he's not "You stupid bitch" about it just raised voices and lots of grand hand gestures. What can I say? They're all loud, except MIL.
Still, it's probably my biggest pet peeve. One day I guess H thought he might try this on me.
It went like this:
H: Where is X?
Me: I'm not sure. Where did you put it last?
H: You are constantly moving my stuff! X doesn't belong anywhere but Y! (said in the tone)
Me: ::instabitch:: No.
H: What?
Me: You will not start that with me. We will not have that in this marriage. You will not speak to me like that. I hate it when your father does it to your mother and if you start this with me we will have problems so you better check the attitude, the tone, and reconsider what you want to say next.
Cue both me and H staring in shock at the tone I used.
He apologized, and I did too - I probably didn't need to fire off like that, but we haven't had that problem since.
