Cocktail or Brunch Reception? Please help!

fallingsnow

My fiancee and I are considering a Cocktail or Brunch (possibly Lunch) Reception mostly due to budgetary concerns (but also because I'm not the kind of girl who is comfortable being the focus of everyones attention for an entire evening.)

But we disagree on which could be a more elegant affair. I'd love to get some outside feedback on this!  (Both options would have to include a DJ and dancing...)

MY OPINION Personaly, I feel that the brunch/lunch celebration has the potential to be a little classier.  We'd be providing our guests with a full meal, and most of the regular "wedding" atmosphere I think most people come to expect. I'm concerned that the cocktail reception could leave guests feeling hungry, or even worse leave them with the feeling that we were just too 'cheap' to  do the real thing.

FIANCE'S OPINION: My fiance feels that the cocktail reception would feel more elegant, and that with enough hors d'ouevres, food shouldn't be a problem.  He thinks the brunch gives the stronger impression that we were too cheap to do the real thing.

Help!  We don't want to spend the down-payment on a house to do a big traditional sit-down-dinner wedding, but I don't want our guests to feel any less special. 

Please give me your opinions!

MyNameIsNot

Start talking to caterers.  It depends on what sort of hors d'hoerves you are looking for, but we found that the price of offering enough of that kind of stuff to fill people up was actually more expensive than a simple meal. 

Either one can be really lovely and elegant, but I defiantly think you'll get more bang for your buck if you do a brunch or lunch event. 

If you do a cocktail reception, you pretty much have to serve a full bar, and people will partake.  If you do it during the day, you can skip the bar or do something simple like mimosas and bloody marys, and people won't drink as much. 

megk8oz

I'm going to ditto MNIN on this. Cocktail reception to me indicates that there will be cocktails, so you would have tp have a full bar for it. Whereas a brunch you can get away with simpler things like champagne and mimosas ... most people don't gripe about not having access to scotch at 12 in the afternoon. So you could easily save money on just the alcohol alone if you go the brunch route.

Definitely see what caterers in your area are charging for certain things. Appetizers might not be cheaper than brunch food, depending on what you select, but then again, they might.

But, as far as your FI saying that having a brunch reception "looks cheap", he couldn't be further from the truth. If done properly, a brunch reception can be every bit as lovely as an evening reception.

aerinpegadrak

Ditto MNIN and Meg.  Start pricing out your options for both, but the bar will likely be the dealbreaker.  The other thing to keep in mind is the timeline for the day: brunch or lunch will likely mean getting up at the buttcrack of dawn, while a late evening cocktail reception will mean a later start but also staying up later.  We're night owls by nature, so we opted for the evening reception and found a caterer who could work within our budget.

fallingsnow

 I'll definitely check around on pricing, but it's nice to know it's not "just me" thinking the brunch reception might be a nicer option. Thanks everyone!