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I need some advice

Framay De Jonge 82Framay De Jonge 82 member
First Comment
in Wedding Reception Forum
First I am in South-Africa and english is my second languages. So sorry for spelling- and timemistakes. I need some advise about my best friend, who is gay. I realy want him to feel part of my big day. I first thought to ask him to be my "maid of honour" so to say. "Man of honour" but my fiance almost died. Then I thought to ask him to give me away, my dad past away, my mom almost died. He is my best friend and I know he and his boyfriend will be there for me, every step of the way. How can I make him part, let him know I appreciate all his effort. Please help. Thank you, May
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Re: I need some advice

  • renegade gauchorenegade gaucho member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary
    Yeah, if either my fiance or mom had a reaction like that to my best friend, there would be a big problem.  What exactly is it that they object to?

    You should put your friend in either of the roles you suggested and tell anyone who has a problem with it to shove it.
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  • Knottie1450123632Knottie1450123632 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    i agree with PP>  i dont have a dad so im having my daughters best friend walk me down the aisle who i treat as a son.  If anyone on either side had an issue there would be a discussion. 
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  • alithebridealithebride member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_i-need-some-advice?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:3df5a25a-121b-4ec9-921b-4e89c973ec65Post:0db82432-7160-45b9-babe-9cdb3a6ad3a7">Re:I need some advice</a>:
    [QUOTE]<u>If my DH had told me I couldn't have my man of honor, there would not have been a wedding. Period</u>. Have him in either role, who stands next to you and who walks you down the aisle are nobody's business but yours, and that includes your FI and mom. ETA: and by the way, him being gay has nothing to do with anything and no bearing on the situation. If he were a straight male, I would give you the exact same advice.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    agree!! your FI is being a jerk about this. YOU choose your attendants.

     

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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Your FI and mom do not get a say in who your attendants are or who escorts you.  If they're going to be that immature about it, I think you'd better reconsider marrying this guy...and whether or not your mom should be there.
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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    First Comment First Anniversary First Answer 5 Love Its
    Have him as Man of Honor, and tell your FI to STFU.  He has no say in your attendants, or in your friends.  If he has a problem with you having a male best friend or a gay best friend, you've got a bigger problem.  
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  • Framay De Jonge 82Framay De Jonge 82 member
    First Comment
    Hi guys, Thank you all for all the advice. In the months to come, I will drive you all nuts with questions. Just to clear some things up. Being gay or straight, does not bother me. My best friend being gay, just make him more special to me. My fiance as well as my mom, feel gay is wrong etc. I do not share the same opinion, but then again, there are a few things my fiance does not agree with me. We being dating for a while, and he know my friend is gay. At the beginning he used to complain etc, but I just turn a deaf ear. Today my friend boyfriend and fiance are good friends. So with time you can learn to adopt to certain situations. I just do not want to turn into a bridezilla, and not keep him in the loop as we'll. Thnx again. May
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