Adult only reception?

CierraM09

We are getting married on a friday evening and having a cocktail type reception. I would like it to be adult only but my mom who is paying for part of the wedding doesnt like this idea. What do all you ladies think?

Knottie1450123632

whomever is invited to wedding---- im assuming children are coming to the wedding then they need to be invited to the reception as well. 

if you do an adult only reception where would u like the adults to stash the kids?  i know i wouldnt drive back home or to hotel have a babysittr lined up and the drive back to reception. 

jessicabessica

How many kids are we talking about?  If it's not many kids, I don't know if it's worth fighting your mom about, since she wants kids and she's paying.  If you want to decline her contribution, then you don't have to worry about appeasing her on this.  Could you compromise on immediate family kids only or something?  

Also, as PP said, if you invite kids to the ceremony, you need to invite them to the reception. 

Are you serving dinner, btw?  

AddieCake

I agree about it depending on the number of kids. If it is a small amount, and your mom is contributing, it is probably not worth the fight. 

Jen4948

How many kids are we talking about?  As PPs have noted, any kids invited also have to be invited to the reception.

How formal is your wedding?  Even cocktails on a Friday night can be pretty formal.

If you put your foot down on this, can you compromise with your mother on something else?

mlg78

Are there SPECIFIC children your mom wants there?  If she is only referring to her grandchildren, for example...that's a different story.  I think it's okay if only particular children are there as long as it's fair...  And I don't think I'm making an ounce of sense.  I guess a better way to say is if the kids are on the same "level"...lets say your cousin's kids are invited...but another cousin's kids aren't.  

I'm with you -- no kiddos.  (and my mom's paying but she agrees).

woolfeml

I'm in the same boat sort of... I dont wish to have any kids at the reception except for my nephew and fiance's 2 nephews but mom is wooried people will get mad at me. she cares more than I do..... I think if people find it inconvenient to take the kids somewhere after the ceremony then they dont have to go to the ceremony..the kids that is.... babysitter? I dont think if they are invited to ceremony that they have to be invited to reception. It's your day so you canmake it how you want :. Also, maybe let your mom know that kids tendto take over the dance floor and I dont think ppl really like that.

Viczaesar

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_adult-only-reception-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:581f2248-9cb0-4f13-83a6-d847ff9101dcPost:830ba150-853e-45be-a6c9-beccdc00d861">Re: Adult only reception?</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm in the same boat sort of... I dont wish to have any kids at the reception except for my nephew and fiance's 2 nephews but mom is wooried people will get mad at me. she cares more than I do..... I think if people find it inconvenient to take the kids somewhere after the ceremony then they dont have to go to the ceremony..the kids that is.... babysitter? <strong>I dont think if they are invited to ceremony that they have to be invited to reception. I</strong>t's your day so you canmake it how you want :. Also, maybe let your mom know that kids tendto take over the dance floor and I dont think ppl really like that.
Posted by woolfeml[/QUOTE]
Except that they do.  Everyone invited to the ceremony needs to be invited to the reception.  If you don't want them at the reception, don't invite them to the ceremony either.

AddieCake

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_adult-only-reception-2?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:581f2248-9cb0-4f13-83a6-d847ff9101dcPost:830ba150-853e-45be-a6c9-beccdc00d861">Re: Adult only reception?</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm in the same boat sort of... I dont wish to have any kids at the reception except for my nephew and fiance's 2 nephews but mom is wooried people will get mad at me. she cares more than I do..... I think if people find it inconvenient to take the kids somewhere after the ceremony then they dont have to go to the ceremony..the kids that is.... babysitter? <strong>I dont think if they are invited to ceremony that they have to be invited to reception. It's your day so you canmake it how you want :</strong>. Also, maybe let your mom know that kids tendto take over the dance floor and I dont think ppl really like that.
Posted by woolfeml[/QUOTE]

<div>The reception is a thank you to your guests for coming to the ceremony. A thank you to ALL your guests. And if you WANT to look like a jerk, then yeah. You sure can do whatever you want. </div>

TheVirginians

Decline mom's money so you can have what you want. Otherwise, let her have those kiddos close to her.

alithebride

dh and i had an adults only reception with 2 exceptions: my first cousin who was 8 and my only siblilng my half sister who was 7 at the time. those are the only kids in my immediate family. all of the other kids are 2nd or 3rd cousins and there are literally 75 of them. we had to draw the line somewhere so we decided that cousin and sister were it. most people were fine with it -they got a babysitter for the night and had a great time.
of course there were some people who coudln't make it from OOT but we knew that would happen.
it was fine and we didn't have any issues about it.

ElcaB

A simple alternative would be to provide childcare during your reception in a separate room if there's one avaiilable. Hire a babysitter or two (depending on the number of kids) to watch the kids while the adults enjoy the reception. Order pizza or have kid-friendly food on hand. My cousin did this and it was a perfect solution.