2 friends getting married the same year! friend chosing same date as me!!!!!!!!!

MARYT23

my boyfriend & I chose my wedding date last year. we started doing our research and kept all details to ourselves until we have everything booked and ready. My friend recently announced that she was getting married! SHe asked me to be her maid of honor...I was sooo happy for her and honored to be part of her wedding party. i asked her when she will be planning her wedding, she specified September 2010. i felt that i had to tell her about our date and our wedding plans, thought it would help.
i have been trying to help her plan her wedding since New Years and then she finally decided to wait until spring 2011.....this gave us more time to help eachother and next thing i know she comes over to my place and annonces that she has chosen to get married OCTOBER 9 2010!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my face dropped and didnt know what to say or do! this is the most insane thing that i have ever heard!!!!!
What do you say or do when someone flips their lid like that????
What a bridezilla!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lasairiona

She's not the bridezilla. From your description, she is not the one who is having a panic attack. What exactly is the problem? If you were so set on this particular date, you should have mentioned it to everyone you planned to invite, hence why people send out save the dates. At this point, there's nothing you can do other than decline the position or change your date.

hagen.colleen

Lasairiona are you nuts? Unless I'm mistaken on her post, she told her friend her wedding date before the friend had set one, then the B**** went ahead and picked the same date! That's monstrous.  If I were you, MARYT, I'd tell her how hurt you are and that you cannot see how her picking your date could be seen as anything but a direct insult and that you obviously can't be her MOH when you'll be busy being a BRIDE!

AmoroAgain

That's pretty whack.  However, you need to relax.  Obviously, she's stupid, not a bridezilla.  Did she realize that you had chosen that date?  Because clearly, she can't have you as an MOH if you're busy. 

This whole situation is bad.  Two brides being in each other's wedding parties is just asking for all sorts of trouble.

banana468

Is she aware that you actually booked the date and that you weren't just thinking about it?

Did SHE book the date?

It's rather odd that she 'had' to have the same date as you if you already said that you chose it - but if you're not all booked for the ceremony and reception then it sounds like she's trying to swoop in and get married before you - which does sound a wee bit craptacular.

cqbride

I call troll! Definitely too overboard to be believable-- and only one post. Not convincing at all.

SarahPLiz

So she won't be at your wedding and you can't be her MOH if you are getting married at the same time.

Maybe you should propose that you have a double ceremony and split the cost!

felicia220

What is troll? 

Ashly018

Unless your a twin, I think a double ceremony is a horrible idea...

It's your special day, and it should be your friends special day...
Obviously not the same exact day, but if she's that kind of person you probably wouldn't want her at your wedding anyways. 

My friend is getting married October 10th, and I'm getting married on the 21st... My date is still subject to change because I haven't booked a location yet, but Thursdays aren't exactly a popular wedding day.  I feel kind of bad that I am planning mine so close to her's, but I have always wanted an October wedding living in Arizona where it's incredibly hot most of the year, and I want it to be before the holidays when my fiance's family is traveling every where. My family is all in the area, so it will hopefully be more convenient for his family.  I know that my friend will probably not be able to go to my wedding because she will probably be on her honeymoon, but hey thats ok, she will just have to come visit me when I move to Vegas.

suz62984

I'm getting married October 9 too.  Just had to throw that in.  Just tell her that you mentioned that this was your date prior to her picking it, you think it is unfair that she scheduled her date knowing it was in conflict, and you and your FI picked this date last year. Decline the position as MOH and book everything good right away.  Also send out save the dates immediately if you have the same guest list.  If you have the same friends for the wedding party ASK THEM NOW.  She wants to play dirty...play back!

megk8oz

"Bride Wars" anybody?

Did your friend actually book this date? Or did she just announce it's her date, in the way that most couple's invent a b.s. date when they're still making tenative plans?

I wouldn't freak out until I knew for sure that both weddings were irrevocably set on the same date.

Even then, I'd very nicely tell my friend "I'm sorry, I can't be your MOH, I happen to be getting married that day".

...

And then I'd make a voodoo doll of her cake and toss it in a bucket of Clorox.  But that's just me.

MyNameIsNot

I've got to agree, there's got to be more to the story.  It just doesn't make sense that friend 1 gets engaged, annouces her date, and proceeds with planning the wedding, and then friend 2 gets engaged, asks friend 1 to be MOH, and then proceeds to plan the exact same day.  Unless this girl has some sort of mental deficiency, she knows that you cannot be MOH on the same day that you are getting married. 

It sounds to me like you aren't really engaged yet, and you were putting the cart before the horse in picking the date. 

PDXMartha

it doesn't matter.  Contrary to what many friends, posters here, and vendors will tell you, it is NOT your day.  You do not own that day.
Just apolgoze that you can't attend her wedding; she should understand if you're both getting married on the same day; however, if one's early in the morning and the other's at night, you both could attend each others with no issue.
I think it's great you can really share the excitement with a friend.  And the great thing is since she's not getting married before you, that's one less person you have to hear "you'll understand when you're planning your wedding" or "you'll understand once your married, too" crap.

PDXMartha

oh yea.
Anyone who even thinks, let alone says, the words:
"My boyfriend and I chose my wedding date"  is not ready to get married until you realize it's BOTH your wedding.  You could do a little growing up.  The marriage is a much bigger deal than one day.