Wedding Reception Forum
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No kids at the reception?

My fiance and I are getting married in four years, one of the main things I want at the wedding, but more likely at the reception, is no children. We have no children of our own and we don't plan on them until after we're married. I really don't want kids running around and parents not paying attention or the cake toppling over due to grabby hands. How bad is it that I want to enforce this?

Re: No kids at the reception?

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    Well, if you don't want them at the reception you can't invite them to the wedding. What are parents supposed to do? Leave the ceremony, drop the kids somewhere, and then come back?

    You have four years to worry about this. Just leave their names off the invite when they go out.
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    Four years?  Think about this in about 3.5 years.  Why in the world are you even worrying about something that's going to happen the next time the Winter Olympics is held?

    But to answer your question, you can invite anyone you want to your wedding.  And that includes children....or not. 

    You're going to find that many things you're POSITIVE about now for your wedding will change 27 times in the next four years.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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    You don't have to invite children to the wedding if you don't want to.  Just be sure to address the invitations to the adults only.
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    Four years?  The children you don't want to invite aren't even born yet.

    It's fine to have a child-free wedding for whatever reasons you desire, but with that, you have to accept that some people may choose not to attend if little snookums isn't invited.  Once it comes time to start locking down your guest list (in about three years or so), you can deal with it then.
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    I am dealing with this same problem.  I definately do not want children at my wedding.  The only children that I want there are my two.  My sisters wedding was completely ruined due to bratty kids.  My reception location is no place for children.  My fiance has about 8 neices and nephews that are all under the age of 7.  His family means the world to him and I know he wants them there.  Unfortunately, his neices and nephews tend to act up and I would hate for them to put a damper on my big day.  Is there any way around this? or anyway to get the point across that they might not be invited?
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    Having an adult only wedding is fine.  I can tell you that if you do a strict rule, rather than having exceptions all over the place, it's going to be easier to deal with.  When the time comes to send invitations, just address it to the adults.  You can also write the RSVP card to keep them from writing in kids.  If you want to warm people up to the idea, you can mention it now to parents/siblings, and let word spread.  
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    I also do not want children at the reception. My invitation states Adult Reception following the ceremony. That and not putting the childrens names on the invitation should get your point across just fine. It is what it is and it is your day and people will accept your request. As a parent of a 6 year old I understand the request completely. Most people are willing to get a sitter for such an occasion. But, you can not make any exceptions for anyone or there will be trouble. If that is what you want go for it and stick to your guns.
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    I think this is one of those "to each their own" moments but I personally (as a mother of a six year old boy) know this wouldn't set all that well with me if I saw it on an invitation.  I know, just don't go but its more the reasoning behind it.  I can see if adults want to have a good time without worrying about their behavior in front of young children but to exclude children with the assumption that they'll automatically act like little monsters, that's where I have an issue.  There have been far many wedding receptions with kids invited that don't have cakes topple over or kids running in the aisles.  In fact, it seems if anything, the cakes get toppled over by drunk adults.

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    You can limit your reception to adults only, if you want.  What you can't do is write "Adult Reception or Adults Only" on the invitation.  That is rude.  Whom is invited to a wedding is determined by the names on the invitations.  Some people will be upset, but you can explain that you had limit the reception based on the size of the reception location or budget concerns.
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    It's fine to have an adults only wedding, but make sure it's across the board - don't invite this kid and exclude that kid.  I'd be fine with leaving dd at home with a sitter, but if I get to a wedding and see other kids running around, I would be MAJORLY ticked off!!!!!  I would have no way of knowing who the kids belonged to, which "tier" of family they'd be, or if they were the sons of your former boss.  All I'd see is that my kid was excluded and everyone else got to bring theirs.  It wouldn't sit well with me at all and I'd definitely take it personally.  Just my $.02.

    Also, be prepared for the parents to decline your invite if the kids aren't invited.  Some parents (especially of newborns and very young kids) don't want to leave their kids with a sitter that long, especially if they're breastfeeding.  So it's easier for them to decline the invite.
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    I'm getting married in June and I have on my invitations "following is an adult reception" and the details where. In my opinion after 8 or 9 at night the reception is no place for child anyways. Why pay the money person for kids that will be leaving early. I don't think my decision for an adult reception has impacted my guest list, or my RSVP's. Good luck and I wish you well.
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    Okay.. I still have some time to decide and nothing is set in stone but this is what I am planning on doing (hoping I don't get slaughtered..):  I'm inviting my FI neices & nephews (there's 5 of them one of which is the ring bearer) and my flower girl.. There will be several other kids excluded but they will all be kids of my cousins and what not (most of which I don't know well).  As it is my guest list is 250 and I cannot accomodate for all of the kids in my family.  My plan is to higher a babysitter for after dinner until x:xx pm (because the wedding will be in a hotel so they can go to a hotel room) and provide things for them to do (coloring, games, videos, toys, books, etc).  The problem is that all of my cousins will be invited (they are all over 18) but some of my FI cousins will not be because of age.. I know people will get angry but I'm not sure what else to do.. we're very very close to his neices & nephews... So I guess I'm not much help to you.. I always thought I wanted adult only and I still kind of do.. ahhh soo many decisions.. I can't decide.
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