Destination Weddings Discussions

Bridal Shower host giving me attitude

So one of my moms friends, who I've known my whole life, offered to throw my bridal shower when I first got engaged. Some of you may have seen previous posts about how she doesn't seem to be that into doing that anymore, and I was so confused about why she is acting the way she has been. Well I was talking to my mom today and figured out why she's been acting so weird towards me.She & my mom got into a little argument about the shower a few weeks ago, and so this friend started saying like "Well why is she getting married in Mexico? It's her wedding so she can do whatever she wants I guess." And my mom was like - yeah exactly. It's their wedding. Then this friend says to my mom "Well you guys didn't take us into consideration at all."As if FI & I were suppose to plan our wedding based solely on if they can go? Whatever. Seriously, get over yourself. It's our wedding, it is not about you. I wish I could say that to her face. It really makes me mad she would say that, I've always considered them like family. She seems to think I picked Cancun specifically so she couldn't go, because she doesn't like Mexico.Thank goodness for my FI and my very supportive mom.

Re: Bridal Shower host giving me attitude

  • Sorry you have to deal with that.... I don't understand why some people think that you (we.....brides to be) have to schedule our plans around theirs.  Excuse me, I do believe this is OUR wedding!  Brian & I put a lot of thought into the aspect of picking a location where it would be financially comfortable for our guests to join us if they could.  That's one reason why we changed our location from Hawaii to the Cruise.  We knew that there was going to be close to 20 people having to fly from the MidWest (Minnesota) and to Hawaii, it would be outrageous.  While looking into it, it would cost them approximately $1800 to fly and for 6 nights of lodging.  That did not include ANY MEALS whatsoever.  This is the ONLY thing we compromised on with respect of our guests.  Other than that, we're doing what WE want, when WE want, and how WE want.  We've had a couple of people throw their two cents in, but we just kinda ignored them and they've quit their pouting now... I'd say just stick to your guns.... as long as you've got your FI and your Mom's support, that's all that should matter! 
  • You know, the thing I think I'm most mad/hurt about is that she even thinks I would pick someplace so anyone - let alone her - wouldn't go. That just proves that she's known me forever, and yet obviously doesn't know me at all.Honestly, I'm over it as of now. Thanks for your supportive words, Shelli :)
  • Oh, and I think your wedding on Catalina is going to be amazing!! What a great idea, I can't believe it never occurred to me to look into Catalina.
  • Well, Brian wanted to get married on a Beach..... so that sorta narrowed down our locations.. we had been planning a cruise for next year prior to us getting engaged, so we decided, heck, let's do a cruise wedding!  There were so many options to choose from, and I wanted to keep the length short for the first time cruisers... just in case they didn't like it as well as they thought.  I've been on this exact cruise about 8 years ago, and thought that Catalina Island would be perfect!  Except you know, their beaches aren't those georgous beaches like in the Caribbean you know?!?  Coupled with the fact that we locked in at a group rate that was a STEAL, we couldn't pass it up!  :)
  • Sarah, I am so sorry that you are going through this. It really is just one of those things you have to deal with when planning a DW. I was talking to a good friend of mine from college last night about lots of things - and I said something to the effect of "Now that the wedding is only 6 weeks away I am getting kind of sad that a lot of people won't be there, but this is the decision we made and were comfortable with it, and we look forward to the big party in October." Then he goes "It's f***ing Hawaii, did you seriously expect people to come to Hawaii?" Which totally sucked. I mean, we have four friends coming to the wedding, and we couldn't be happier about it - but its like... really? Like I am a bad friend for picking Hawaii over Mexico. (We have some other friends getting married in Mexico in November, where everyone is going because its less expensive). IDK... it totally sucks... and I am sorry. But know that WE know that you are a very loving person and would never make wedding decisions purposely to exclude people! Hang in there, hopefully in the end your bridal shower will be fabulous!!
  • Thank you ladies :)I always know I can count on the DW knotties to lift me out of a funk. When FI and I got engaged he actually told me something along the lines of "Be ready because people get crazy around weddings and start to think it's all about them." And I was like, yeah whatever - people won't be like that with us. Boy was I ever wrong, hahaha. I've really gotten over the whole, trying to please everyone thing. Now I'm to the point where it's like, ok this is it - stop whining & get on board, or don't. LadyBird - I'm sorry your friend did that last night! People really can be insensitive - not to mention the fact that he doesn't realize you already knew a lot of people wouldn't be able to go. We support you here!Shelli - I think all of your guests will have a great time because you've really taken their feelings into consideration. Plus Catalina is such a great area, the buildings and scenery are so cute.
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards