I am about to have a nervous breakdown

blacksred

I didn't even know where to post this but this board is where I feel home. We started out me and him getting married in St Thomas and having a small brunch 75 people when we returned. His mother was very offended so we moved everything to Turks and Caicos (it had a better all inclusive option). Then she was telling everyone and it went from 15 people to 60! Then my grandmom got sick so we were gonna move everything home, but of course prices skrocketed and now we are up to 180 people, and he came to me last night begging to do our St Thomas idea and just having a party when we return unfortunately w. 150 people. I just had finalized my bridal party and feel kind of stupid changing everything AGAIN for the third time. I guess I was just trying to make everybody happy but driving myself crazy at the same time. ugh thanks for letting me vent.

chosen175

We're going through the EXACT same thing, only not because of FMIL! (Went from a DW to a really unique wedding at home, and now I'm wisking we could just elope somewhere tropical without telling anyone with NO party when we get back.) I don't really have a way to calm your nerves, but I know how you feel. I've decided not to mention a single peep about any more plans to anyone besides FI until we have a definite decision that is booked and paid for. It's just so hard for me to justify spending that much $$ on a SINGLE DAY of my life when money is already tight for us. *HUG* Hopefully you will find an answer that works for both of you. Don't let anyone else's version of a perfect wedding make you give up YOUR vision of a perfect wedding. They had their shot, now you get yours.

chosen175

*wishing* Sorry, it's early. :-)

blacksred

thank you, also my name is Lisa too!

MzelleRicaine

I don't really have any advice either, just some hugs to offer if you want them!::::hugs::::::*m*

Future.Mrs.H.

I know how hard it is to say no to the important people in you life and feel like you are making them mad at you and unhappy about your decisions. But pleasing people is making you unhappy and stressed out and it is your wedding, so you should be able to have the weddings you guys want, not the wedding FMIL or anyone else wants. They already got married the way the wanted to, not it's your turn to plan the wedding you want.Go with whatever makes you guys happy; even if that means you change plans 20 times. Remember again that you and your FI get to do this once, so make sure that you are gonna be happy with every choice and never have any regrets.Plan everything without telling anyone. Ater you make a final decision explain to your family that you were not happy and they you change your plans; they will understand, and if they don't want to be happy with your plans, that's their problem, not yours, and they will eventually get over it.Good Luck! and **Hugs**

brian&shelli

I agree with previous posters! This is about YOU and YOUR day, not anyone elses! I wish there was a way we can all make you feel better, but just know that whatever you decide will, in the long run, make you happy. You don't want to look back at this event and have any regrets because you did it to please others, you want to look back on it with great memories and knowing that you did what YOU wanted and what made YOU happy!!! It is a difficult thing to try and please everyone, especially FILs, but unless everyone agrees on every single aspect of YOUR wedding, someone will be upset and in definitely shouldn't be you or your FI! Whatever you decide to do, I'm sure it will be marvelous regardless of what others may think!!! Tons of hugs for you!

AprilJT

I agree with pp's!  Do what you want to do.  My fi's family were very upset that we were going to Jamaica and acted like it was a huge inconvience to them.  We just booked it and said this is what we are doing, we would love you to be there but if you don't want to be that is fine.  His entire family is coming.  I guess what I'm trying to say is, they get over it.  They didn't want to miss our wedding and haven't complained since.  In fact now that its so close everyone is getting pretty excited about going to Jamaica.  HTH  Good luck!

blacksred

I just want to say thank you so much for all your kind words and encouragement.