Destination vs. Home (Pittsburgh)

Chopar

Here it goes -- the destination vs. home wedding question.  I have spoken to so many people and battled with the pros and cons of each option that I am about to go crazy (and drive everyone around me crazy too!). 

My fiance is from Pittsburgh and I am from Bulgaria (my parents still live there), so our original idea was to get married in Bulgaria.  However, most of my friends (and my sister) are in the US and needless to say, his too.  A lot of them are not willing to travel that far away for a wedding and we feared that we will have a very small wedding, it will feel more like we are eloping...  I do want to have my friends around me.

However, we do like the idea of the beach, the romantic location, etc.  Also, a destination wedding will allow the two families to spend more time together to get to know each other (as opposed to simply the day of the wedding).  So in hope that a closer destination will mean more people will be able to come, we considered Riviera Maya for our destination option. 

Both options sound appealing to me.  With Pittsburgh, I know what I am getting and I feel like I have control over the actual day -- how it looks, what happens, etc.  With a destination, as beautiful and magic as it might look on pictures, I am still nervous about not knowing what I am going to get on the day of...

I am soo torn between having a bigger wedding in Pittsburgh and having a somewhat smaller (but not too small) wedding in Mexico... And after talking to people around me time after time, I feel like I am the only one tormented by this question... My sister is starting to screen my calls because she knows what I am going to talk about  

Any words of advice from my fellow brides/brides to be?   

enteringparadise

Can you do an outdoor wedding in Pittsburgh on a lake to make it feel like a DW during the summer?

captainleela

Having a DW is really no different than having a wedding home, in that you can choose what you want and what you don't want. You can chose how much control you want over your wedding. Some brides just want to pick a package and show up and give all the control to the wedding planner. Others want to have more control and more choices...it's all up to you and where you decide to go. We're getting married in Key West and I was able to choose everything...decorations, menu, flowers, cake, etc. It's no different than it would be would I be getting married at home, except my wedding will be smaller and more intimate, and I will be getting married next to the ocean with my toes in the sand and the sun shining down. Sure, it involves a little bit of adventurous spirit if you've never been to the location before...but that's part of the fun of it.
Like everyone else said, only you and your FI can make the decision, but know that if you do have a DW, it is still possible to have complete control over your wedding. Also, just one last tip....don't rely too heavily on your friends' and family's opinions. You will never be able to make everyone happy, and it will drive you crazy getting everyone's differing opinions. This is about what you and your FI want and what feels right to you.

SandalGirl

I agree with previous posts!  You have to decide what is right for you!  Good luck!

Catalina Island Bound

In Response to <a href="http://destination.weddings.com/Sites/weddings/Pages/main.aspx/wedding-theme-boards_destination-weddings_destination-vs-home-pittsburgh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Theme BoardsForum:54Discussion:aa11efae-aca3-41b2-a548-0e6d01466ecbPost:4b214db5-ab3e-4084-8d03-3e02bcc22ecd">Re: Destination vs. Home (Pittsburgh)</a>:
[QUOTE]Having a DW is really no different than having a wedding home, in that you can choose what you want and what you don't want. You can chose how much control you want over your wedding. Some brides just want to pick a package and show up and give all the control to the wedding planner. Others want to have more control and more choices...it's all up to you and where you decide to go. We're getting married in Key West and I was able to choose everything...decorations, menu, flowers, cake, etc. It's no different than it would be would I be getting married at home, except my wedding will be smaller and more intimate, and I will be getting married next to the ocean with my toes in the sand and the sun shining down. Sure, it involves a little bit of adventurous spirit if you've never been to the location before...but that's part of the fun of it. Like everyone else said, only you and your FI can make the decision, but know that if you do have a DW, it is still possible to have complete control over your wedding. Also, just one last tip....don't rely too heavily on your friends' and family's opinions. You will never be able to make everyone happy, and it will drive you crazy getting everyone's differing opinions. This is about what you and your FI want and what feels right to you.
Posted by AlaskanAlison[/QUOTE]

Agreed!

dvorak1

As I read your post it sounds like an echo of exactly what is going through my head! Just got engaged in December and am torn between a destination and "real" wedding. After a month of googling and on the verge of driving my freinds and fiance crazy, we are 90% sure we will go the destination route. Her are my reasons...maybe they will help
1. I am the only one out of my group of freinds that would do a destination wedding, so I think it will be so much fun to do something different

2. We have a budget, and if we can spend the same amount in 6 hours or 6 days, well...

3. We are asking that people look at this as an opportunity for us to take a vacation together. We just happen to be getting married too! I think that this is a great excuse for people to take a vaction they have dreamed about.

Hope that helps a little - let me know what you decide

Chopar

Thanks to everyone that replied! It helps me to hear everyone else's experience and thoughts! And dvorak1, I am glad to know I am not the only one! I think we are also 90% for destination wedding, but will take a couple of days "off" wedding thinking to really be sure about what we want to do... Good luck to you too!