Curious.......about Guests

Erinkathleen84

I am wondering how many of you had people back out of your wedding. As in people that told you they were 100% going and later RSVP'd no. I am having a slight freak out moment because we have held villas for everyone that have guaranteed us they were going...and if people back out I will not get the full amount back. After looking through our budget I REALLY hope this does not happen. 

EmilyL113

Weelllll.... you know your guests better than we do.  But I will tell you that I absolutely had people back out that told us they were going, verbally.  It sounds all awesome and everyone's excited at first... then when the planning/financial part starts getting real, people do realize they can't make it.  I estimated about 110(ish) that told us 100% yes... I imagine we'll be closer to 90.  I totally don't want to freak you out, but that was my experience.

WinstonsGirl

None, yet, but most said they wanted to goa dn were trying, but most said they weren't sure if the didn't know for sure.  

jtoly

I don't have expierence in this but I'd assume some guests may think they can make it and then like Emily said, may realize when it came down to it that they just couldn't afford it. Hopefully that number won't be too many!

SunshinyLees

Oh I totally feel for you! I was sure no one was going to bail out of our wedding, especially since we tripple checked with all our guests, but in the end my WC was right when she said people always back out at the end, we had two people do this!!!
We asked for rsvp's one month before our wedding. We contacted everyone to ensure we had final numbers and sent that off to our WC/Caterer 2 weeks before the wedding. Well...2 days before we were all scheduled to leave for Maui this is when our friends told us they couldn't join us anymore.Unfortunately it was due to health reasons, but we couldn't get our money back from the caterer. Whats the cancellation policy for the villa? Can your guests secure their own accomodations rather than you putting down the deposit for everyone? That's alot of pressure on top of planning a wedding!Good luck, Lees;)

ehlerss

We did and it really upset me.  We were told by FI's father that he and his wife and there son were for sure coming and they even talked about wha activities they would do.  Then we get an RSVP in the mail, no explanation, no call just a check on the no box.  Then the next day the same thing with FI's uncle and aunt.  I am more hurt that they didn't even call FI to let him know.  So total we lost 5 people so far at least.  I am worried that FI's other uncle and 2 cousins are not comng since we have not heard from them and also his other cousin who is supposed to be a groomsman.  I am really upset about it all, but I guess there is nothing we can do.

Erinkathleen84

I was actually talking with my FI about this at dinner tonight. He is 100% sure that everyone is coming...but I am not convinced. I don't know ... it would be awesome if everyone could go but I have a feeling some people will back out. I was just curious what everyone else's experience was. 

We have held the villas because it is not really a "resort" and in order for us to hold the entire property (which we needed for all the guests that told us definitely) I had to put a 50% deposit down. The cancellation policy is that they will refund 70% if they cannot book the villas.

I just really 1 - do not want to lose $$ , 2 - do not want to lose any of the people I invited (we invited them for a reason!) and 3 - want to make sure the property is private. I love the idea of the property only being us & our friends/family for the week.

kimmykupcakes

It could happen. So far all of our guests have RSVPed yes, except for four. Of all of those who RSVPed yes, all of those but, two have their tickets. Of the four who haven't turned in their RSVPS, two have said they would absolutely be there.  However, I doubt it and really don't think they will be.  I guess we will see. I would not reserve and pay deposits for guests because someone always backs out. They should do it themselves. 

Erinkathleen84

Unfortunately we already put deposits down and held rooms So we cannot really go back on that. But the good thing is there are two seperate properties. One for friends and one for family. The one for friends can be adjusted...the owner is very flexible and willing to work with me. The one for our family is the one that is causing me stress. I really do not see any of these people backing out because my Mom is buying her of the families accomodations and my Dad & his family as well as my FI's family have already bought their airfare. 

I guess you never know though =/

Also ... we had to guarantee rooms for our AHR hotel...did anyone else have to do this? As in if they are not booked we have to pay for them !!! We made sure to do a very small amount because we can always add on (just cannot guarantee the rooms are available)

I guess I thought it was normal that the bride & groom hold rooms for people.

nicolej518

i had confirmations from people before the save the dates even went out. It is pretty much our wedding party (which was decided before we switched to a DW), and immediate family. There are a few non-immediate family members that found out about it, and they contacted me, so we just arranged from there. Are you collecting payments from your guests, are are they making payments on their own. If it isn't too late, I would definitely try getting some sort of payment structure set up so that at the last minute guests aren't telling you they can't afford it.

I actually took it upon myself to collect all monies and organize the whole financial part of it. I got numbers from my travel agent and went from there. That way I am keeping track, and I think it will be a lot easier for me to remind them, than for the travel agent. I set up monthly payments, and for the most part, people are sticking to it. Excel will make your eyes cross after looking at those numbers for too long, but I have it all broken down there, and it is soooo helpful!

Sp2012

I just posted about this on my month board. I'm in the midst of getting our rsvps back, and one couple that sent a yes have now changed to a no, no explanation.. Our RSVP due date is march 5 so it's over a week still. No big deal, I'm glad we heard now and not later. I only arranged room blocks that I would not be financially responsible for.

Erinkathleen84

nicole -

I am doing the exact same thing you are ! I have let everyone know in their info packets & website the amount the accommodation is per night and they can just send us the $$. We are including an accommodation card/envelope in the invites too. Our accommodations are pretty cheap (between $37.50-60 per night per person) so I did not do monthly payments.

With our wedding vision this was the only way we could hold accommodation. We knew we wanted some kind of property/villas and the owners are usually just locals who cannot handle a bunch of payments coming their way. Not to mention there is pretty much no reliable mail in CR. LOL

murphanzo

We invited about 40ppl and I know of 12 that won't come right off the bat.  But out of the remaining 28 (who are all super excited) I'm expecting about 10 to bail last minute.  I think with people's tax returns not being as big as they expected and financial responsibilities some will have to decline.

teatree78

You could always mention to the guests that this could happen if they back out. Not to scare them or anything, but then they know the investment that you are putting in to have them at your wedding. My FI and I are paying for everyone's accomidation in a big house. We are having everything very private as the whole property will be ours. I think knowing we took care of part of their vaction planning helped the guests know how much we care about them and want them at our wedding.

Erinkathleen84

I let everyone know at the beginning of planning that I had to know for sure in order to hold the rooms. There have been a few that have backed out ...but it has not been a big deal. I am just worried with the rising prices of fuel / airplane tickets that some people may just not be able to come. I hope that this does not happen !