I don't usually like to do this, but . . . VENT!

ktelizabeth86

So, I took my BMs dress shopping quite some time ago. Their dresses have been in for awhile. My friend lives an hour 1/2 or so away and so she just came home over the weekend to try her dress on. Turns out her dress is too tight. When we ordered the dresses she ordered a smaller size b/c she was being "optimistic" (those are her words). She's a tiny girl but has gained a little weight. I don't care that she's gained weight, but am a little worried about getting the next size up dress in time and then having it altered (she's sort of between sizes).

Anyway, that's just the back story . . . not the vent. So, today I contacted David's Bridal and figured out what she needed to do to be able to exchange the dress. I sent her a text and told her when she took it in she just needed to ask them how long it would take to get the new size in. We have to make sure we can get it in time and then have time to get any alterations needed. She sent me a text message back and it said "Okay, is there a David's Bridal in my area? And when is the wedding date again? Lol."

Maybe I'm being stupid, but I felt so offended that she had to ask me when the wedding date was. I asked her to be a BM forever ago. The wedding is in three months. I haven't asked her to do anything but get a dress, but shouldn't she know when I'm getting married? By the way, I did send her a STD back in December as well. Just made me sort of feel like crap.

FI and I are going to two weddings in August. I'm not in either wedding. I've remembered their dates since we found out we were invited.

End rant. Thanks for listening lol.

mbuckley85

I get that my wedding isn't the only priority in people's lives, but yeah, I also sent my STDs out in December.  I'd be kind of pissed if my wedding party didn't know when it was.

xxjen015

I understand completely!!!! One of my BM's asked me the exact same question! I was like, are you kidding me?! I know she's really busy, she is the director of a day camp from 9-6 M-F and got her first teaching job for next year. Her brother just got married a week or so ago, and she is in another wedding in November, but still! She couldn't find the time to go look for dresses, and she couldn't remember my wedding date. I let my girls choose their own dresses as long as they were short and chiffon, and I gave them at least a month's heads up before they needed to order. I had to order hers on the last day possible to order without a rush fee and she tried to make me feel bad about it. 

I'm at the point where I kind of regret having asked her to be a BM because I don't feel like she has time for me anymore. She manages to find time to hang out with some of her other friends, but not me. I don't want to kick her out, by any means, I'm not that kind of person, but I'm getting incredibly frustrated with her. Vent away, I didn't realize I needed to until I read yours! :P

[Deleted User]

She could have looked at the STD before texting you, but in her defense I'm terrible with dates. I was in my best friends wedding a few years back and it took me awhile to set in my mind if it was the first week of the month or the following week. I'd give her the benefit of the doubt that she at least knew the general month but didn't have the exact date set in mind. Our date stands out to us but that doesn't mean everyone else has it set in their mind. Hopefully as it gets closer it will become important enough for her to remember. Honestly though I'd probably have the same reaction as you if one of my BM asked!

ktelizabeth86

Yeah, it certainly isn't the end of the world and I know people forget things. However, I would think if you are in a wedding that would be something you'd want to remember.

And when she recently moved out of her other apartment she told me she left her STD on the fridge, so she no longer has it.

I just hope she shows up on the right day! Lol.

BMBrinson

Heck my mother in law has asked me several times when the wedding date is! i just roll my eyes and let it go....they will be there, its just still a ways away for most people.

TheSlowskys

I wouldn't care.  My friends keep forgetting the date.  I know its on their calendar and they will be there.  You're overreacting.