Thrilled but feel guilty- Guest list issue

RockstarWifey0912

So I finally got my guest list into the knot )) and after the final count came up, I posted on facebook, "Totally blew the cap we wanted for the guest list.  Oh well, it's worth it!  I'll make it work!"

An old work friend of mine (T) whom I had invited emailed me and said, "K, I know planning a wedding is stressful, especially if you're paying for it yourself out of pocket.  If you need to cut your list, M and I do not mind at all.  I appreciate your thinking of us.  Just let me know!"

Well, I'm not gonna lie, that was a huge help.  I adore T and her daughter M, but the first place I had to trim people was at the friend level.  I'm thrilled that they both are so sweet and understanding, but I feel guilty because I really did want them there!  I told T that if something changed, she would be the first to know, and she said it wasn't a big deal, whatever worked out worked out.  

Upside, my mom offered to cover the additional guests, so it's not a big deal.  Downside, yuck for that awkward conversation!

hllokttygirl

I am going through the same thing. We have to keep it at a maximum of 80 people to keep our pp rate. After that we have to move to the bigger room where the price skyrockets. People keep assuming they are invited and then I am trapped in this horrible, uncomfortable conversation. I would love to invite everyone, but it is just not possible. I am so glad that things worked out for you; wedding planning is very stressful. Good luck with the rest of it!

rustic1

I hear you there.. We are paying for the wedding ourselves. This is a second marraige for both, so I'm having trouble with the whole who needs to be there and who I want there. My first wedding was huge and this one we need to cap off at 100 guest. I know I can't invite everyone, but who do you leave out?
 My mom told me to remember that it is our day and we invite those closest to us.

RockstarWifey0912

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_thrilled-but-feel-guilty-guest-list-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:807af0c6-00b0-4023-b92f-131d211768b3Post:f486254b-c3ab-4a8d-ab2b-7c009d3a80d6">Re: Thrilled but feel guilty- Guest list issue</a>:
[QUOTE]I hear you there.. We are paying for the wedding ourselves. This is a second marraige for both, so I'm having trouble with the whole who needs to be there and who I want there. My first wedding was huge and this one we need to cap off at 100 guest. I know I can't invite everyone, but<strong> who do you leave out?</strong>  My mom told me to remember that it is our day and we invite those closest to us.
Posted by rustic1[/QUOTE]

<div>Exactly!  I felt so awful leaving people out, because truthfully the ones coming forward and saying, "We understand, really, it's not a problem..." are the ones I want there over family anyway!  I'm not a fan of about 20 people in my family but they 'have to be invited' to make my grandparents happy.  Gag me, but whatever.</div>