Wedding Cake

Wiggle Your Toes13

Hi Everyone!!

So I kinda have a dilema right now and I need some help. 

When we were deciding on cake for the wedding we wanted to save some money so we heard that FI's cousin did baking on the side and had make a couple of cakes before and that we wouldn't have to pay her very much for it. At the time we were super excited about it. 

But...

Now, I got more money back from taxes than I thought I was going to and I kinda want to go thru a prefessional bakery for the cake and cupcakes now. I have been thinking about it and I love that she would do all this for us but, I think I would feel more comforable about having a professional do it. 

Would that be mean? What are your guys thoughts on it? 

BMBrinson

I would approach it as "we are worried that you are not going to be able to enjoy the wedding festivities, we where able to find the money to pay someone to do the baking so you can relax. If you still like to bake cakes/cupcakes...maybe you wouldn't mind baking them for the shower/engagement party? 

Just be polite...I think she would understand.

irishangieb

totally agree with PP.  Explain how you want her to be able to be a guest and not have to work.
If that doesnt fly, maybe she could make the groom's cake (if you're having one...or maybe now you could add one if you had not planned on it?)
Maybe some sort of cupcake thing for the rehersal?

PattySmith101

Personally my feelings would be hurt ( i bake cakes not professionally but i have taken classes and i do it as a side business also)

also making the cake and cupcakes would all be done before the wedding so you cant tell her that that you want her to be a guest and your worried about her not enjoying the wedding, because by then her part is done already and she will be able to enjoy the wedding!

why is it you dont want her making your cake?

Wiggle Your Toes13

*PattySmith101

The reason being I don't think she has ever done a wedding before. I would love for her to do but I would feel more comfortable if I had a professional. She hasn't ever used fontant or anything. She also hasn't been getting back to me when I send her messages. 

PattySmith101

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_wedding-cake-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:e76f338f-588b-4c74-9095-7576f4e24e12Post:3405cd17-00e0-4f37-a619-346c6fabd3c8">Re: Wedding Cake</a>:
[QUOTE]*PattySmith101 The reason being I don't think she has ever done a wedding before. I would love for her to do but I would feel more comfortable if I had a professional. She hasn't ever used fondant or anything. She also hasn't been getting back to me when I send her messages. 
Posted by Wiggle Your Toes13[/QUOTE]

oh well that makes more sense now... i would feel more comfortable with a professional than too... fondant can be tricky to work with until you are used to working with it! but be prepared for her feelings to be hurt since you were very excited for her to do it and now your basically going to be telling her you have more money so her work is now not good enough! than again she may be relived because making someones wedding cake can be stressful!

Olexa1979

I agree with the ladies are saying, just let her down the easist you can...

What i found also is that my venue, does provide cake, but i have chosen to have an outside vendor make it for me, however, the cake must come from a "Certified Kitchen" or they will not serve it...I have some friends who do WONDERFUL WORK!!  but i was not able to them as their kichens are not certified., and the one friend i wanted at first, was RELIVED when I told her I was going to have bakery do it, she ended Matron of Honor, so it all worked out well!! 

music11

If she does not do this professionally, I would not have her do it.  Just be gentle.

Just think, if something went really wrong (which is entirely possible, as weddings are large events, and she is probably not used to baking on that scale), there would be resentment within your relationship afterwards.  Go with a pro.

Ali092011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2012-weddings_wedding-cake-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:56b9bcef-1e34-456e-81f5-cfaa107456b2Discussion:e76f338f-588b-4c74-9095-7576f4e24e12Post:02b560d7-fe3e-4d67-8fec-5ebaa139948b">Re: Wedding Cake</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wedding Cake : oh well that makes more sense now... i would feel more comfortable with a professional than too... fondant can be tricky to work with until you are used to working with it! but be prepared for her feelings to be hurt since you were very excited for her to do it and now <strong>your basically going to be telling her you have more money so her work is now not good enough! </strong>than again she may be relived because making someones wedding cake can be stressful!
Posted by PattySmith101[/QUOTE]

Yeah, to avoid hurt feelings, I would leave the tax refund out of it. Just say you were doing some thinking, and you think it would be best to leave it to a professional.

And it's a good point what a PP said about the possibility that your venue will not let you have a cake from a home kitchen--have you checked?

I would let her know ASAP. I know your wedding isn't until October, but make sure you don't leave her hanging for any longer than you have to. My friend waited until the day before food shopping (a week before the wedding) to tell FI, who's a chef, that he didn't need him to cater his wedding anymore. Not cool.

Good luck!

[Deleted User]

Could you ask her to make a sample one to see how she does, then she can get some practice and you might feel better once you see what she can do?

joshysgirl1220

maybe you can ask her to do a grooms cake instead?