This is soooo long, so don't read it if you don't want to (duh). Cliffs notes at the end.
I just got back from a weekend trip to Denver (my FI is from there and all of his family live there) from hell. The trip was originally for a friend's wedding where my FI was a GM and then my FMIL and FSIL had said they were planning a shower for that weekend since we would be in town.
Well about a week and a half ago we still hadn't received an invitation or heard any details about the shower, just that it would be on Friday or Saturday (wedding was Sunday). So since it was a week before said shower date and they still didn't even know what day it would be held on, my FI called them and told them not to worry about it. That apparently lit a fire under their asses and they started calling people to invite them. For Friday night.
My FI asked why it couldn't be on Saturday since more people could probably come (bad traffic for some on Friday) and apparently my FSIL who is on unemployment and bartends on Saturday nights needs to sleep in on Saturdays so she can stay up late Saturday night. Ummm....what? So the shower is Friday night.
Then it turns into a couples shower which my FI specifically requested it not be. So after a whole lot of other BS we show up Friday night and it was a BBQ with his family. No shower games or anything, no one asked us about our wedding, nothing. Then my FI's cousin who is getting married a couple weeks before us showed up. She sat next to me at a table and immediately started talking to her cousin next to me about her wedding and a wedding nightmare she had had. I asked her about her wedding and she would answer them without asking me about ours.
I know that no one cares about my wedding as much as I do but this was supposed to be a fucking WEDDING shower.
Then my FMIL brought out the gifts for us to open and only about 1/4 of the people there gave us anything. I don't need gifts, seriously I don't, but again, what was the point of this BBQ? So we awkwardly opened 5 gifts in about 5 minutes.
THEN we're inside and the cousin who was getting married showed me a picture of her dress on her phone and I pull out my phone to show her mine. My FMIL started talking about how she has a picture on her laptop and goes to get it. I told her I had it on my phone but I'm guessing she didn't hear me.
So 5 minutes later I'm sitting at a table next to my FI and she comes in with the picture full screen and flashes it at everyone. O.M.G. She realized he was sitting right there and quickly closed it and my FI claims he never saw it but I know he wouldn't tell me even if he did. I was so so mad but didn't want anyone to see that and think I was a diva so I just stayed quiet.
Everyone left shortly after. I'd much rather have no shower than that train wreck.
Part 2
My FI owns a house in Denver which he rents out to a family and pays his brother and dad (used to just be his bro but he can't drive anymore due to a brain tumor) $100/month to manage the property. Well they had mentioned a few months ago that there was water coming up from the kitchen floor but that they had fixed the leak and left box fans there to dry up the water.
Well we were planning on having the tenant sign the new lease while we were out there and when my FI called to schedule it the tenant alerted us that the leak kept coming back and they couldn't tell where from. When we got to the house the front lawn was completely dead, there were weeds everywhere, and the driveway is covered in oil.
FBIL admited he hasn't checked on the property in a while. We went inside and the entire kitchen floor was squishy due to all the water underneath. Much worse than what was represented to us. My FI looked at all the water damage in the cabinets and determined it's most likely coming from the sink or dishwasher. He pulled out the dishwasher, set it to run, and 5 minutes into the cycle saw water gushing out:
Open up the dishwasher and:
Big freaking hole inside. (the coil had been bent from over stuffing the dishwasher and burnt a hole)
So we ripped out the pergo flooring that my poor FI installed himself (thank goodness there was the original linoleum underneath).
Melted stucco/drywall from a candle...umm...what?
Shattered oven door. Fantastic.
Holes in the fence from their snot-nosed kid throwing rocks. And weeds. Lovely.
I am still so beyond mad at my FFIL and FBIL. Obviously there's an issue with the tenant but I feel like my FI's family who were being PAID should have kept a closer watch on the place. If you can't keep up on it tell us so we can hire someone who can. FI thought he was doing his brother a favor since he can't work. We have still yet to hear an apology. They're off the payroll indefinitely though.
The whole weekend just makes me so sad for my FI. He's such an amazingly giving and selfless man and I feel like his family just doesn't give a crap about him. He deserves better.
CN: my FMIL and FSIL threw me a last-minute 'shower' where no one talked about the wedding or gave gifts. Then my FMIL accidentally showed a picture of me in my wedding dress to my FI. Later we discovered that my FI's house that was supposed to be watched by my FBIL and FFIL had extensive water damage. And I cried a few times.