I have had the most overwhelming few days. It almost feels like the few days before the wedding all over again. But I feel the need to get this out here, and also explain my siggy.
We were married on 7/24/10. My grandpa lived in Florida for the longest time after my grandma died. This grandma and I had a very special relationship, and when she passed when I was 14, I was absolutely devastated. I still am - it's very hard for me not to cry even now when she's brought up. It took 10 years for me not to cry when thinking about her at all, and while it's easier now, I still often cry when I think of her. She was my best friend in my childhood. So when DH and I got engaged, I knew I had to find a way to get my grandpa to come. The problem was that he had a series of mini-strokes about 7 years ago, and doesn't like to travel.
DH and I went down to Florida to visit him in February and to see what kind of shape he was in. I hadn't visited my grandma's grave ever, and I hadn't seen him in a long time. We spent 3 days with him and realized that he really couldn't travel. It was a hit, but we knew we couldn't push it any longer.
Less than a month later, Grandpa had a "premonition" and he didn't want to be down in Florida anymore. He said he wanted to be around family and that he thought he could use more help. So the family moved him up to Yonkers where he lived in an assisted living facility. DH and I looked at each other and talked to my dad and realized that we might be able to get him to the wedding after all, now that it was a hour's car ride away. And my dad talked to him, and Grandpa agreed to come. He would come for the ceremony and the cocktail hour and then go home, but he would be there to see us get married and to walk down the aisle and I was the happiest girl in the world.
Fast forward to the wedding day. Everything was wonderful. Grandpa came, got dressed at the venue, took some pictures, walked down the aisle, had something to eat, took a few more pictures, and went home. It was amazing having him there and knowing that he experienced this. I am the oldest grandchild by 15 years, the other two are in middle school. My grandma never knew the other two, they are named for her. I feel like that by having him there, she was there too. And it means the world to me.
The next day, we went to three brunches and then left for our honeymoon, where we were oblivious to the outside world for two weeks. We got home Saturday night, and then Sunday morning my dad called, saying that he needed to come over. He did, and told DH and I that Grandpa had passed away. The night after the wedding. He went home, told everyone at the facility how amazing it was, what a great time he had, how beautiful I looked and how proud he was. He talked to my other two uncles on the phone and told them again too. He went to sleep, and when he didn't come down to breakfast the next morning, the staff went up and found him - he had passed in his sleep.
The assisted living facility staff called my family around 2:35 - DH and I had left the brunch 5 minutes earlier.
I really feel as though he hung in there for the wedding. That Grandma must have been saying, "Irving, I CAN'T be there, so YOU had BETTER be there, and then come up here and tell me all about it!" And he did.
Between Grandpa, the car accident I was in before the wedding, name changing, starting a new job, and trying to get the house together I am completely overwhelmed. But I needed to get this out here. If you're still reading, thanks so much for listening.
RIP Dr. Irving Fishman - 10/1/19-7/25/10 - thank you for holding on for me.
You made my wedding day complete.