A little dilemma

Jamy0807

I've planned an intimate wedding. Everything is taking place at my parents home. The ceremony and reception will be in the backyard. My parents have a lot of land overlooking mountains. It's really beautiful and ever since I was a little girl I've dreamed of it happening there. So here's the little problem. My fiancés parents are really religious and, while they are not demanding it, they want us to get married in their church. I'm not Catholic. They are. To me a church wedding is traditional and that's not who I am. My fiancé is not picky and doesn't really care but I don't want any tension or problems with them in the future. They are not footing the bill for anything but they did say that they would pay for the church if we had it there. My question is do I give in? It would save my parents a little money and make my future in laws (and I think my fiancé) happy. Give me some advice.

SteveandKris

This is a question only you and your FI can truly answer (maybe your parents as well, as it would save them some cash).  You are going to have to live with your ILs for a long long time, with any luck.  Is it worth having the wedding you want for some tension later?  Is it worth giving up on your dream wedding?  I have strong personal opinions against marrying in a church and I knew that I wouldn't since I was about 7... but that's my story.  Only you can write yours

Amerbutt81

I understand wanting to please the FILs, however, like pps said, this is YOUR wedding.

Perhaps you can honor their wishes by incorporating a reading or prayer of their choosing into the ceremony?

nicole8586

I think you should talk to you FI about what he wants so you know for sure.
 Maybe you can have what your originally planned for and then have your marriage blessed in the church. This is very common for destination weddings so it wouldn't be out of the ordinary!

Good luck!

neongreenbox

It is a toughy situation - I am in a similar boat however it is my mother that is starting to push the church issue. I have heard where some people will have a small church wedding the day before with just the immediate family and then do the planned civil ceremony and reception the next day (or later in the day.) As previously suggested there is the possibility of still having the marriage blessed afterwards and then your husband would still receive his sacrament of marriage.
Keep in mind that for a Catholic wedding you will need to go to pre-cana class (just a day but more $$$)

ysl1983

You can have your ceremony in you parent's backyard then have your marriage blessed by the Catholic Church...perhaps the weekend after?  This is something that the church does.