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December 2010 Weddings


I have just had it up to here with a friend. She IM'd me on FB to apologize for not sending in the RSVP yet in response to a reminder email I sent out. Told er no prob. Then she asked about the spa day I have planned for the day before the wedding. I sent her the brochure and explained pricing, etc. Then she tells me that it is way too expensive and how she doesn't understand why I would pick such an expensive place. Yes the place is expensive but I was limited on places that can handle a large group so that we are not waiting in line to take our turn and a place that offers a nice lunch. I was able to get us a 20% on all treatments as a group and arrange for a day pass and lunch for $60 in case anyone didn't want or couldn't afford a treatment. The lunch is $25 and includes appetizer, meal, dessert, and a beverage and the ammenities include saunas, hot tubs, pools, gym and deluge showers.

She proceeded to tell me that I could have found a cheaper place and that I am being unreasonable asking my friends to spend this much and that she is not interested in "hanging out". But that this should be about spending time with me.

The shower that my friends and family are planning will include an evening event as well so there is an opportunity to "hang out" but this friend moved to SoCal and can't come up for that party.

She continued to argue with me about my choice stating that it is not her idea of a good time and she doesn't want to hag out with a bunch of people she doesn't know. I snapped and explained to her that her bachelorette party at a S.F. female impersonator club was not my idea of a good time either, which cost $65 pp and provided an array of questionable appetizers and no beverages and there was only ONE person there that I knew. She also informed me of the definition of a bachelorette party and how my plan doesn't meet those requirements and that if I really wanted to spend time with her that I would have chosen a more affordable place.

I responded with, "If you really wanted to spend time with me then you would find something on the menu that you can afford and come."

This is the same "friend" that I posted about before. I really wish I could rescind my wedding invitation at this point!!!
Image and video hosting by TinyPic Happily Married Since December 18th, 2010!!


  • well, sounds like she won't be joining you at the spa day - at this point I'd be glad of that!!!

    Yikes - I would not want to attend a cheap spa the day before my wedding - you would want to know the service is top notch.  

    Try nodding and smiling, and remind her it's your day, and you'll spend it the way YOU like to.  Like you said, hanging out with ladyboys is not everyone's idea of a good time!
    December Siggy Challenge
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    Where we met - Mount Isa
    a small mining town in the Australian Outback. Neither of us are from there but we both moved there in the second last year of highschool. He was moved next to me in maths class to stop him talking. It didn't work.
  • I dunno, if I had the choice of going to the spa, or going out clubbing, I'd choose the spa. 

    Just tell her, "hey, sorry if you can't make it, i understand that in this economy not everyone can afford it, but this is where i'd like to go, and so i'll see you at the wedding, lemme know if you change your mind'. 
    Married December 18th, 2010 :)
  • iamsteph has the right idea - as much as this friend expects you to conform to her idea of a "good time",  ultimately you should do what you feel comfortable with.  She is under no obligation to attend the spa day, (or the wedding for that fact) and you should not be put on a guilt trip because she moved and can't make other parties.  One of the reasons that weddings have traditionaly been a symbolic transistion into adulthood for women is that we had to exercise our ability to choose our battles!

    Don't worry - you'll have a beautiful wedding - with or without your friend and her input.  (Enjoy the spa!!)

    No matter where I roam, I'll always be a California Girl at heart!
  • Thanks ladies, especially for reading my long rantings. It just frustrates me that of all the things that I have to deal with as a bride that this friend be the most stressing.

    But you are all right!!! And I tried to do the sorry if you can't make it but I'll catch you at the wedding thing until, idk, the 5th time she stated that she can't understand why I would choose this. 

    En fin, woooosaaaah! ha ha.....I just have to laugh at this point
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Happily Married Since December 18th, 2010!!
  • Oh my gosh misslol's ladyboys literally made me lol.

    Back to the topic... she's a b!tch. There, I said it. Good for you for trying to defend yourself though and at the very least you know that you will have a great spa day without miss "it's all about me" hanging around being a pain. It sounds like you fully intend to lay down the law and if she gives you more crap about it just say "look.. your idea of fun and my idea of fun are NOT the same thing. I like to GET something for my money, and while you don't, I totally respect that. I will see you at the wedding" and let it alone.

    Hopefully you'll be able to get through the wedding then not have to deal with her. Ugh!
    118 image
    Not caring about missing RSVPs because there aren't any rocks!
  • ahhh that freaking sucks how can "friends" be so bitchy sometimes!
  • LMAO AKG.....you said it!
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Happily Married Since December 18th, 2010!!
  • Damn that sucks!  Does she not realize its your day and you can do what YOU want! :) 

    Im kind of getting this too from my MOH.  She doesnt necessarily argue but ill ask her stuff and she'll make snude comments.  Like I let her pick out the BM dresses cause all I really cared was that they were red and long so she picks out a dress that is $230 okay whatever.  After they came in second comment out of her mouth (besides they were beautiful) was "whenever I get married I would have my BM in something that they could wear again like a black cocktail dress."  Oh okay thats great but im not you!  She also made comments about the hair salon but oh well she'll get over it.
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  • I love all the backhanded comments! UGH.....It is OUR day....they need to just get with the program :)
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Happily Married Since December 18th, 2010!!
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