Pre-Cana

berrytr

I just wanted to take this opportuntity to tell all of my Catholic Knotties how wonderful my Pre-Cana experience was today.  While I was aware of the topics to be covered (since I serve as a Catechist), it didn't guarantee it would be an enjoyable experience.  I was especially concerned b/c FI is not Catholic.  He really enjoyed the experience and while we feel we know one another quite well, we learned a lot.

ExpatPumpkin

That's awesome!  We really enjoyed it, too.  It's nothing to dread, girls

Megglez2008

We went to ours last weekend and actually had a pretty good time. We even had ballroom dancing instruction as one part of our afternoon! FI and I came away from it feeling really good about our relationship and how strong it is.

lburkey21

We just had ours this past weekend! FI and I had a wonderful time and came out of it on such a high. We feel really great about our relationship! We also are going to be involved with it next year as one of the married couples - I'm excited for the opportunity!

rlb81

My church has recently implemented a new Precana program called "For Better and Forever." Basically the couple gets a workbook and meets w/ a married couple 4 times before the wedding. We met w/ our mentor couple for the first time last week and it was a lot of fun. It's interesting to get a perspective from strangers! Our pastor has already asked us to be mentors once we are married which is a huge compliment to FI and I This program is only through our church- not the diocese, which I really enjoy because we will always be able to see our mentors during mass after we're married.

We also did a traditional Precana back in August which was just a one day event on a Saturday afternoon w/ about 130 other people. That was nice as well but seemed really impersonal as it was more of a lecture.

theredskittle

Any advice for me to give my FI who is skeptical about the whole experience?

berrytr

One of the things my FI said to me after we completed this experience was that he appreciated having opportunities to share his thoughts.  In short, he felt he got out of it what he put into it.  So, my advice would be to encourage him to participate in all of the activities, small group and large group.

samurai21

I hate to say that both FI and I, and the other couple at out table, hated our pre-cana experience. FI isn't Catholic and we were both looking forward to it, but it was a huge, boring, disappointment.

Here's to hoping our sponsor couple meeting goes well.

berrytr

@samurai21, I'm sorry to hear that.  Your experience is what I feared FI and I would go through.  I guess the personality and skills of the presenter can make a big difference, uh? 

Here's hoping your sponsor meeting goes well.

samurai21

Ours really had the potential to be ok. Honestly, I think they either need to make it longer or more topic focused. Ours was four hours and broken into 3 parts: A couple married for 20 some years with children, Natural family planning, and then a priest.

The first couple was pointless. They talked in circles and were mainly telling theirlife story. I'm sure they enjoyed hearing themselves talk about their lives, but it didn't really relate to marriage /> They mainly talked about Christmas and how we might stuggle with it and splitting time bewteen two families. Umm...about 98% of the people in the room had/have been 'dealing' with that for awhile. Weird.

The NFP people started out ok. They weren't super preachy about it and were honest about their pasts, but then they started spouting statistics that sounded a little ridiculous and they wouldn't cite their sources, so then that was a little off.

The priest was the only really great part, and he spoke the least amount. He's one of only 3 priests in the diocese where we're getting married that's been married before. He married his HS sweetheart and she later passed away from cancer. It was so touching. He had been thinking of becoming a priest before they got married and did so after she passed. I could go on and on about what he said.

But good luck with yours! Hopefully it turns out better than ours did.

berrytr

Wow.  Okay.  That DOES make a difference.  Ours was a day long session, 9am to 5pm with a break for lunch.  We had much more time to discuss issues in depth and only one couple conducted the entire presentation.

cindym87

We just did it this past weekend and it was horrible.  Friday night, from 7pm - 9pm, consisted of a couple reading excerpts to the group from "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus". Saturday from 12pm - 4:30pm consisted of  a few couples talking in circles (our response to each one was "what was the point of that?").  The most memorable was a couple with nine children promoting natural family planning by citing some, um, "questionable" facts.  For example, that condoms cause breast cancer and vasectomies cause brain cancer.  My fiance and I both felt that the general tone was condescending and patronizing. We do NOT recommend it.