Catholic Weddings

So I had my first Reconciliation

It was a very, very emotional experience. I was upset because I had been promised anonymous confession, and the way the booth is set up, when I am walking in the Father could see who I was. Once you enter, there is a small curtain with a kneeler. Anyway, the coordinator asked the Father to close his eyes so I could enter without him seeing me, so he did. I felt a little silly but it was the best I could get I guess.

It was very hard. I immediately broke down into tears and just cried from shame. I wasn't ashamed at having to confess "in front" of someone, I was ashamed of the things I'd done, especially since 99% of the time, I knew it was wrong and did it anyway.

The priest spoke to me very comfortingly, told me it was okay, that God could feel my sincerity, and not to think that I was confessing to him, but that I was confessing to Jesus and that he was just there as an intermediary,and had me take a few deep breaths. So I did and calmed down a trifle, and started confessing. My sponsor had me write down everything I wanted to say, because she said I would get flustered and forget, and she was right. Some were harder to confess than others, causing fresh tears.

After I was done, the priest talked to me some more, and counseled me on how to do better, and assured me of God's forgiveness, that all was swept away and I was starting with a clean slate. Then I said the Act of Contrition, and he gave me 1 Our Father and 2 Hail Mary's. I thanked him and left, and went to the bathroom and cried for about ten minutes. Once I was done, I went into the chapel and knelt down to say my penance, and also to profess my sincere regrets, and thankfulness for the experience.

So all in all, while it was very emotional and painful in some ways, it was also very freeing and it gave me so much grace.

Thanks everyone for your kind words of encouragement last week when I was freaking out about this.

Re: So I had my first Reconciliation

  • Jasmine&RajahJasmine&Rajah member
    Knottie Warrior 100 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    I'm so truly happy for you - and so grateful to God, who gives us such amazing blessings with this Sacrament!  Deo Gratias!

  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_first-reconciliation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:3ce6ecd1-d9bd-44f9-af16-00efb8c4c7f0Post:9764ebe9-7881-4015-96db-caf0d3ae4abd">Re: So I had my first Reconciliation</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm so truly happy for you - and so grateful to God, who gives us such amazing blessings with this Sacrament!  Deo Gratias!
    Posted by Jasmine&Rajah[/QUOTE]

    That is so true. I have teared up every time I've thought about it. God is so good.
  • edited December 2011
    I am glad you felt better in the end.

    My first time was terrifying, too. I was going through a lot at the time, H (then FI) had just moved away, and I have always had a strained relationship with my Mom. I cried, too. But afterwards I felt so much better.
  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 25 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    i was scared my first time too, and i was a little kid and didnt have any big sins to confess! 

    the good thing is the more often you go, the less likely you are to commit major sins in the first place.   also, your list of sins to write down is shorter!  dont forget, you confessed as an adult - that's a lifes worth of sins.  it should be a big list if you think about it.  it shoudl only be easier now.

    isnt the post feeling amazing?
  • edited December 2011
    I'm so glad it all went well for you in the end. I still get nervous about going to confession, but agree that the feeling when I'm done can't be beat. I'm very excited to hear how the remaining days go for you!

    *Many prayers and blessings for you*
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  • edited December 2011
    Yes, the feeling after I was done was great, but it took me a while to feel that way. I kind of walked away feeling like I didn't "deserve" to be forgiven. I feel better now though.

    Thanks for the T&P Bibiophile. :)
  • monkeysipmonkeysip member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    I'm so glad that you had a good experience!

    You know, whenever I was protestant, I prayed about my sins, but I never really "felt" forgiven.  I felt like I kept saying sorry for my sins over and over because the guilt never went away.  Now that I'm Catholic, I'm so glad that I can give my sins to God through the priest, hear those beautiful words, "I absolve you..." and walk away!  Don't have to think about those sins anymore!

    May God bless you!

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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_first-reconciliation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:3ce6ecd1-d9bd-44f9-af16-00efb8c4c7f0Post:7c2989c2-e62f-4a2f-ba75-3eaf77d2b7d2">Re: So I had my first Reconciliation</a>:
    [QUOTE]Yes, the feeling after I was done was great, but it took me a while to feel that way. I kind of walked away feeling like I didn't "deserve" to be forgiven. I feel better now though. Thanks for the T&P Bibiophile. :)
    Posted by SoHappyToBeMrsC[/QUOTE]

    I felt that way too, and in fact I talked to my priest about that at one of my confessions. It really took me a few times before I felt deserving of His forgiveness. I am so glad your experience was a positive one - I thought and prayed that it would be!!

    Yay!
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_first-reconciliation?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:3ce6ecd1-d9bd-44f9-af16-00efb8c4c7f0Post:7c2989c2-e62f-4a2f-ba75-3eaf77d2b7d2">Re: So I had my first Reconciliation</a>:
    [QUOTE]Yes, the feeling after I was done was great, but it took me a while to feel that way. I kind of walked away feeling like I didn't "deserve" to be forgiven. I feel better now though. <strong>Thanks for the T&P Bibiophile</strong>. :)
    Posted by SoHappyToBeMrsC[/QUOTE]

    You are very welcome. <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" />
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  • clearheavensclearheavens member
    Knottie Warrior 1000 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    It's so wonderful to hear that you went to confession, especially before Easter.  In the Church, asking forgiveness for our sins has been glorified to a sacrament; a sacrament that you can have over and over and over.  I am happy for you!
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  • edited December 2011
    I am so happy for you :) My fiance just made his first reconciliation about a month ago as well and I went with him (also Im his sponsor) and it is amazing what a weight is lifted from you when you leave. I was so scared my first time too, but after a few times I think you will enjoy speaking to the Preist in person once you get to know him better, and every confession after this one will get a little bit more comfortable. Thanks for sharing your story! God is definitely amazing in so many ways :)
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  • edited December 2011
    Thanks for all the kind words everyone! It was definitely a life changing experience.
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