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January 2011 Weddings

So rude!

I cannot believe how rude some people are!

I went in to a local bridal boutique to see if I could look at/try on some wedding dresses, and I didn't have an appointment, so I asked if they took walk-ins.

The lady says, "Well, what are you walking in for?"

I said, "I'd like to try on some wedding dresses, maybe look at bridesmaid dresses too."

She said, "When's you're wedding?"

I said, "Next January."

"Oh honey," she said, "You have so much time."

I nodded, smiled. You all get that often too I'm sure.

"Really," she continued, "It's too early for you to look for a dress. We'll have so many more coming out, you should really wait."

I just left.

Can you believe it? I came in to YOUR store to possibly BUY an EXPENSIVE gown, and you're just going to turn me away like that???

Besides, I'm not just early planning & crazy. I have other things on my plate besides planning a wedding! I'm graduating soon & want to get stuff done ASAP.


I get comments all the time, but this was a little out there.

Have any of you had people being excessively rude about the length of your engagement or your early planning?

Re: So rude!

  • First off - that lady is an idiot. The bride books and bridal salons that I have read have all told me to start looking around a year away.  My dress takes 6-8 months to come in PLUS I have to get it altered. 

    Secondly, YES, i absolutely hate it when people tell me I have "so much time".  Yes, I realize I had a two year engagement but I did it purposely so I would have time to research and I'm glad I did because I wouldn't have gotten the great vendors and prices that I have so far.

    That woman just lost commission on a wedding dress just because she's ignorant!
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • While I don't think the sales lady handled the situation right at all, I think she may not have meant to be rude. I think she may have just been trying to pursuade to wait a little longer because the Spring 2010 dresses probably are not in the store yet. Even if that was the case, she still should have been more willing to help you look at the dresses they do have.

    I haven't gotten too many comments yet. Long engagements aren't really the norm in either my or FI's circles, so I think no one really knows what to think. The only rude comment we've gotten was from his cousin when we told her our date. She said something along the lines of "wow, why would you pick that far way" in way way that implied that there was something wrong with us for not picking something sooner.

  • I know where you are coming from, especially when I would go to bridal shows last year and the year before...it really would push my buttons and made me not want to contact them later on for their services. They'd ask when my date was and I'd say January 2011 and they'd be like "wow that's so far off...why are you even bothering with planning?" My response..." I'm a college student. I'll be working on my masters degree when my wedding rolls around and working on a thesis. Plus the first half of the year leading up to the wedding, I'll be in my final semester of my bachelor's degree...I NEED time to plan, thus I can only really do anything on breaks...." Then they'd say something along the lines of "oh...o..k...good for you?!?!" with a puzzeled look on their faces....but I've found some great vendors that are understanding and don't think I'm crazy because I'm putting school first and then doing wedding things I can. Those who didn't have a problem and actually appluaded me conitnuing my education, I've hired.

    I even hired my photographer the end of December '08 before her prices went up, I got my DJ last May. I got my dress October '08 and Ive been doing the little things when I can. I already have the invitations designed and whatnot, just gotta print them.

    If something would happen like that again to me, I would tell them "thank you for your time, but I'm going to take my business else where to somewhere that understands their customers and put the customers first no matter when their wedding is..."

    Ok...I'm off my soap box...lol
  • Yogis, I am so with you! In the month before my wedding I'll be finishing my last semester of undergrad, trying to find a job, trying to find a place to live, and applying for grad school ON TOP OF finishing up planning the wedding.

    I'm trying to get stuff done ahead of time so I'm not freaking out when I have everything else going on.

    I figure I want to have my dress ordered by April so I have plenty of time for alterations & whatnot. So I definitely don't think now is too early! Especially since I'm not able to go out & try on dresses like every day. Only like once a month or so.

    And JCS, I'm sure she didn't MEAN to be rude. It just rubbed me the wrong way. And she kind of had an abrasive personality, which I can't deal with--it stresses me out! It just was not a fun experience & she definitely lost my potential business. Bummer for her!
  •  No one has to justify any of their wedding planning to others.

    When I was "thinking" about having a winter wedding, lots of people had comments:
    "Why can't you get married in March"
    "Oh it's going to be so cold, no one is going to come"

    Now when people hint that they are questioning my decision to have a winter wedding, I just say "IT'S WHAT I WANT"

    Seriously, I used to have 3 canned reasons why I wanted to get married in the winter.. Now I realized those reasons are really for ME and My FI to know and understand.. and no one else. 

    I didn't ask my friends why they decided to get married on the (statistically) hottest weekend of the summer.

    Same goes with Vendors.  Please ladies, remember it's YOUR wedding (and your partner).. you do what you want!!
  • That's really stupid. you would think a store dealing with wedding stuff, especially dresses, would realize having a friendlier person greet customers would be in their best interest. Hopefully the next store you go to has a nicer people.

    I didn't think of this yesterday, but maybe you could do quick google searches on stores before you go to them. I think the first results that come back that show the google map and give the address and whatnot also have reviews available.

  • I agree, what fools! As everyone has said, it is no one's decision but you're own how to plan your wedding!

    I also want to thank you ladies because I will also be finishing up my bachelors during wedding planning time and you have really helped me to not feel so crazy for planning now. If anything, you've made me realize that maybe I should get a bit more serious about this now. Especially with a full-time internship over the summer.

    On another note, I purchased my dress months ago. One thing that I really liked was that it was discontinued which not only meant a BIG discount but it also means that by the time my wedding rolls around, it will be pretty unique! Not to mention, I completely fell in love with it. There is NO WAY for that woman to have known whether or not you would have done the same on that very day! I certainly wasn't expecting to purchase when I did.
  • Oh my I get the "Why did you choose January?" question all the time!  We are getting married in MN so I understand the cold and snow factor but isn't that all apart of it? I just tend to ask "Why not?" ... Oh boy. 9 Months away!!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • LMW4588 - where in MN??  I'm so glad I'm not the only one!  We totally wanted snow, snow and more snow, so January in MN made lots of sense to us.  I was surprised at how rarely people questioned our choice - I think our friends and family just expect this kind of craziness from us!

    However, I have gotten grief from a couple of football fans for picking the day of the Rose Bowl and some other big bowl games.  My response to them (and anyone who complains that they'll be cold at the wedding) is that if one day without football is too big a price to pay, then apparently they don't care about us enough to be at our wedding.

    ps - I want to add that I LOVE football and the Rose Bowl, and if my school actually made it next year, I'd be super-sad to miss it.  So, I get where they're coming from, but it's just as insensitive as people complaining about us all wanting to get married in the winter!!
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