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February 2011 Weddings

Bridesmaid trouble

I have a bridesmaid who still has not ordered her dress! The wedding is now less than 4 months away! Just needed to rant...
Is anybody else having trouble? Bridesmaids, receptions, flowers, etc
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Re: Bridesmaid trouble

  • Mine is doing the same thing. I have one BM who has ordered hers and the other is waiting. I'm not sure why, but it does stress me out a little :o)
    Anniversary
  • I wouldn't worry about it at this point.  I still have 3 out of 6 bridesmaid that haven't ordered their dress.  Two of my bridesmaids just order their dress on Sunday from Alfred Angelo, which is where I bought my dress in September and their dresses are supposed to come in at the beginning of December, right around the same time mine is scheduled to come.   We were told that my bridesmaids should order by the first week of December and my wedding is on February 27th.
    Little one is here.
  • The problem with the dress is that it was scheduled to come in one week before the wedding. She finally ordered it this morning, and I paid to rush it. So that's all good now :)
    I tried not to bug her too much because another one of my bridesmaids is getting married 2 weeks after me, and this girl is in that wedding too. It's going to be a crazy few weeks for the 3 of us.
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  • My FI hasn't picked out what he's going to wear yet. It's because of $ and because of unknown expenses that have come up, but it stresses me out. He was going to go with a suit, and then decided he wants to go with a tux, and I still don't know what he's going to end up doing. And I'm not sure what's happening with some of his groomsmen yet because some of them were let go from their jobs, and he doesn't want to be rude and ask them if they're still going to be in the wedding after losing their job, but I'm going "YOU HAVE TO ASK!!" but we meet with the DJ on Dec 5th and the DJ needs to know who's in the wedding party, so I told him that he had until Dec 5th to figure that out. He's from a completely diff. culture where weddings are a big potluck reception, and so all of this stuff is completely new to him (and his mom and dad), so he doesn't quite understand why I freak out so much. Or why it costs so much. It bothers me because when things like this happen and he doesn't do something about it right away it makes me feel like he doesn't care, or it doesn't matter to him, which I know isn't true, it's just the cultural differences. But still -- it's nervewracking. And I have surgery upcoming on Dec. 9th and I want so much of this stuff to be done. So much so that I'm sending my invitations out earlier than I was going to because I don't want RSVP's coming in while I'm doped on narcotics. I've been doing better about not getting so stressed out but things just keep happening. My sister doesn't fit into her JrBM dress and the alterations need to be 2 inches on either side or we need a brand new dress, and I know that there needs to be more than 2 inches put in on either side, so now I'll have to find another dress for her, after buying this one *which, I didn't buy with her there - she's 10 and we got it when we went to David's Bridal for my dress, and we bought the biggest one, which still wasn't big enough* so that's stressing me out. Theres just 9 million things that I have running through my head and I'm so sure I'm going to forget something or somethings going to fall apart and its just going to be such a big mess -- and my FI works 3rd shift and so he can't really help. Not to mention that since this whole thing is new to him that he wouldn't even know where to begin TO help. And I'm a perfectionist so I'm not sure I'd even want help - I'm having a hard enough time letting my mom, sister and MOH help me.
  • I dont think hed be upset if i chose them for him, but he's trying to make them as inexpensive as possible, and he doesn't want me to pay for them. He wants to go to Mens Warehouse, which I really don't care where he goes. He doesn't have the $ right now to pay for them (he should soon), which is the hold up. (This comes from taxes from the government on his truck he wasn't expecting) Plus he's now feeling bad about the groomsmen that got laid off so he wanted to do the suit but it was starting at like $150, and the tuxes are starting at $49, and he wants to make sure that its affordable for everyone. (Personally, I feel if you agree to be in a wedding you know that theres costs associated with it, but he's from an entirely diff. culture where weddings cost like NOTHING, so I'm trying to be patient and understanding of all that-plus he's used to not having a lot of $ and is incredibly conscientious of the fact that others may not have $ either)
    I'm trying to get over my perfectionism and let other people help me, but I also feel like if I let go of some of the responsibilities, then it won't get done the way I want, if at all. I feel like some people say they're going to do something and then it doesn't get done. Or it doesn't get done in the timeframe that I want it done. Or it doesn't get done the way I want it. Maybe its because I feel like I've been the biggest tomboy all my life - and I kinda feel like this is my one chance to show that I can be the girly girl and be pretty and be beautiful and make things glittery and sparkly (not that many things in my wedding are glittery and sparkly, but hopefully you get what I'm trying to say). I know some of that is my self esteem (or lack thereof) coming out and feeling that I have to prove myself. (My cousin got married in 2005 and her dress alone cost 10 G and I can't even come close to anything that expensive, and I don't want to, but I have a ton of DIY projects that I love, but I don't want people to look down on me that it LOOKS home done and they expected something else or its not 'good' enough or it doesn't compare or ... I dont know. There is a ton that runs through my mind and now I'm just babbling because I usually keep it all bottled in my brain.)
  • My MOH is the only one that hasn't ordered her dress. I'm not stressing though. My FI still has no idea what he is wearing. I just keep telling myself everything will come together! There is still time to figure things out. I made myself a list with my MOH & FI with things still left to do. I put figure out & order the dresses & suits by the end of November. They were good with that. Finally going with MOH this Sunday to order her dress, and hopefully I can drag my FI & the Groomsmen out to go pick something out at some point.

    Everyone has their own lives to worry about. I just try to remember that our day will never be as important to anyone else as it is to us, and to just go with the flow. Been working so far! Good luck!
  • I think the checklist on this site has you plan WAY ahead, which is a good thing! I still have one bridesmaid who hasn't ordered her dress, and it is stressing me out a bit, but things have worked out for the rest of my bridesmaids who ordered way after I would have wanted them to. I am just trying to let some things go so I can relax...however, one of my girls ordered her dress and they told her it could take 12 WEEKS so I really hope that doesn't happen to my last girl since the wedding is now LESS than 3 months away :-P
    You're definitely not alone here! Glad she ordered her dress :-)
    Anniversary
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