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August 2011 Weddings

Anyone else feeling "weird" about registering?

Rationally, I know that most of our guests are gonna buy us gifts for our wedding. I know my MOH is excited to throw me a shower. I know that registering makes life easier on our guests trying to figure out what we need (or at the very least, allows them to kinda see our taste/kitchen colors), and makes life easier on us by preventing duplicates/usless crap we don't like/need. I have already had aunts say "don't buy anything else til after the wedding!" and have had family friends already ask where we've registered.

So why am I obsessed with the idea that I'm being selfish? Like people will look at our 2 registries (Amazon and Williams-Sonoma) and think we're being:
a.) presumptous by assuming they're getting us gifts.
b.) selfish by having lots of stuff on the list and more than one registry.
c.) ungrateful by telling them, not only do they HAVE to buy us stuff, but also WHAT to buy.

I'm driving myself nuts counting items on the registries going "OK, I only have 100 guests, so I can't have 104 items" and stuff like that.

Am I a total freak or do others go through this moment of weirdness? I'm not used to being the center of attention like this!

Re: Anyone else feeling "weird" about registering?

  • I can see where you are coming from. However, most people are very used to the entire concept of a couple registering for gifts and possibly having more than one registry. FI and I will likely do more than one because we have such a variety of guest and locations. Having more gifts on the registry than invited guests is perfectly acceptable. It gives the guests more to choose from. Often, the more gifts selected as "wish list items" the more control the gifter has on what they purchase. Try to span out your price ranges. Some people may be going in on something larger, but others may want to purchase one lesser expensive item by themselves. Worst case scenario, someone will give you a gift you did NOT register for. Most places also allow you to register for gift cards (which does seem weird, but practical at the same time... the gifter can choose the denomination and you can purchase something that was left on registry at a discount or something entirely different).

    You and I seem to have a lot of similarities in that we worry we are selfish! Think back to the big wedding for Mom... lol!
    I'm not sure if any of this helps ease your worries, but I hope it at least has some value! :)
  • No it definitely helped a lot!!

    I think my feelings can be traced back to 2 things: one, it's been a very stressful couple weeks here (money trouble and friend drama).

    And second, being unused to being the center of attention like this - no milestone in my life has EVER compared to my being the *Bride*. I mean, it's wonderful and it certainly all comes from love, but I feel like not only am I under the microscope for the next year, but there's all these expectations too. Like I can't do this, or I have to have that, or "what would people think!" if I didn't wear that.

    I'm feeling myself relax now! OK, I have those 2 registries. I have a big variety of stuff: yes, I did register for a rotisserie oven, a KitchenAid stand mixer, and $50 monogrammed napkins and napkin rings. BUT I also registered for smaller things like serving bowls and kitchen gadgets and utensils and cookbooks. And I know I'm not supposed to put those insert things in the invitations.

    So I think I'm OK, right?
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