Connecticut

Can we make this WTF Thursday?

Sooo FI got a text last night from his good friend/goomsman saying that he wanted to tell FI the night before when we were visiting, but he just couldn't, that he's decided not to be in the wedding, because he doesn't know if he'll still be in the US. He and his wife are from Russia, he's been here since high school, she's been here a year and 9 months. She doesn't speak the language, although he swears she understands it. They just had their second child - their oldest is 1 year, 4 days old. Their youngest is 2.5 weeks old. His wife hates it here, but what pisses me off is that she's made no effort to try and speak the language so that she can make friends. And she's the one who got pregnant as soon as she got here, then decided she wanted ANOTHER one before their oldest was even close to being out of diapers. I guess what sucks for us the most is that he was such a good friend and things have changed so much. I understand that when you get married and have kids priorities change, but you shouldn't be totally absorbed by your significant other. Me and my BFF have tried to make his wife feel welcome, but you can only do so much when you can't talk with someone. We handmade both of their kids baby blankets, bought them tons of clothes when their first daughter was born, brought them over dinner... UGH!

Anyway, FI has to decide if he's going to pick another groomsmen, and if so, who it'll be.

Re: Can we make this WTF Thursday?

  • kls114kls114 member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Hahah you go it!! I was way busy moving yesterday!

    Ugggh that really stinks about the GM! Hopefully everything works out!!
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  • edited December 2011
    that's really sucky :( it sounds like you did everything you could to try and make her feel comfortable and welcome and if she's not, there's not much else you can do. i hope that you and your FI can still have a good relationship with your friend despite this. good luck

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  • edited December 2011
    Thanks ladies. Needed to get that vent out.
  • Vikki2payVikki2pay member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    That really stinks, and don't worry if you can't find another GM, we had an uneven number and it worked out great.
  • edited December 2011
    I'm sorry that's so frustrating. At least you tried. I agree- if there's no immediate go to guy for another groomsmen, you shouldn't worry about it. You wouldn't want to have someone just for the sake of having an even number. (Mines not even at ALL lol). Also, depending on how far in advance he asked his party, it may seem like an afterthought to the new person. Good luck!
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  • Whippet8Whippet8 member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    sorry you're dealing with this, it must be so frustrating to be losing a close friend!

    I agree that its not a huge deal about picking someone else. If it's been a while since your FI picked his groomsmen, whoever you choose might feel like a replacement, and not "good enough" for the first pick.

    good luck!
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