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In sickness and in health, and what my marriage now means to me

Hi Knotties-

I had a big life scare this past week, and I wanted to share it with you if you're at the point I was; battling with my parents about what I wanted in a wedding versus what they expected to happen. We're traditional Italians, so you can imagine what I mean.

Here's a quick timeline:
Sunday- ANOTHER lengthy and emotional 'discussion' with mom and dad about wedding size (we're at 284-not my idea), budget, needs and any type of compromise.
Monday- severe pain in my chest and difficulty breathing, ended up going to the ER 10pm that night.

For the next 5 1/2 days, I was hooked up to a 24hr IV of blood thinners to counteract the substantial blood clots that have developed in both my lungs. The pain was intolerable and the doctors said I was very, very lucky.
 
My fiance did not leave my side. He was a statue of calm and love. Once I was out of immediate danger, he had the breakdown he needed. I never doubted he would be there if something ever came up, but we have been very lucky to not have any major life events until now. He showed me what our relationship was capable of handling.

This is no longer a wedding for me. It's a marriage to this person who "through sickness and health" is my partner and forever love. The planning will still be stressful at times and we've got another 18 months of decision making to get through, but at the end of the day, I'm just happy he's here and that we will have a life together.

Enjoy the planning. Enjoy that person you have chosen to love. Enjoy your life.

Re: In sickness and in health, and what my marriage now means to me

  • Carebear62584Carebear62584 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    So happy that you made it through that!  Unfortunately sometimes it takes something significant like that for someone to realize how much they take for granted on a normal day.  You've chosen a great guy it seems that will be by your side no matter what!
  • edited December 2011
    We had a similar situation occur to us.. I was having horrible headaches all of a sudden and I thought I was just getting my families curse of migraines so I made an appointment with my doctor to get some migraine medicine and she sent me to have an MRI which I thought was just a routine exam. Well it turned out to be far from it for us. It came back to show that I had a brain tumor. I immediately had to have another MRI, blood work and within 2 weeks was having brain surgery to have a tumor removed. This was especially scary because we have a 4.5 year old son. So not only did my FI have the stress and the pressure of taking care of me but our son. I was in the hospital for over 2 weeks and was in and out of the ICU and it was the hardest thing we have ever been through, but in the end I wouldn't change a thing. I know I couldn't have made it through without anyone else. He is an amazing FI and an amazing dad.
    image Anniversary Vacation
  • Melissa603Melissa603 member
    500 Comments Third Anniversary
    edited December 2011
    Glad to hear you are doing better!!

    We have definitely had our hardships through the engagement! We got engaged and less than a week later I got laid off due to my company downsizing. So there was some immediate toughness in figuring out how to do daily expenses let alone a wedding!

    On Valentine's Day I sliced my hand with a knife that required an ER trip and 4 stitches. He was amazing the entire time, the perfect hand holder and even paid my co-pay.
  • edited December 2011
    so glad you are ok! I can understand this completely (the italian family and the medical scare!) we actually got engaged after my FI spent a month in the hospital after a motorcycle accident. It's times like this that make you really sure you are making the right decision and marrying someone who will truly be there for you no matter what.
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