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October 2011 Weddings

Groom!

Hey guys!
 I had a quick question for y'all.  I am really happy that my groom wants to be involved, but he's trying to pick everything! I thought it was supposed to be my day!! What should I do?

Re: Groom!

  • HinajHinaj member
    1000 Comments
    First of all, It is not YOUR day, the day belong to both of you.  Its great that your FI wants to be involved, just talk to him and let him know that its great that he wants to be involved, but you guys have to make decision together, it can't be all about what he likes, and all about what you like.  Compromise with each other, or split up tasks like if decoration is really important to you while music played at the reception is important to him.  I am sure you guys can find some middle ground.
  • Wow...you have no idea how many brides wish they were in your shoes right now.  It's definitely not YOUR day, you really should get that out of your head now.  Ditto to what else H said.
  • I actually didn't think my FI would be interested in much except the honeymoon.  So I told my MOH (my sister) she would be stuck doing alot with me.  So I'm pleasantly surprised so far.  I saw an idea somewhere (and of course I cant remember) that suggested each of you "score" the importance of each detail of your wedding. 

    We did 0-5, and for instance honeymoon we both rated a 5.. so we have to agree.
    Napkins he scored a 1, I scored a 3.. so I win out on that.  Getaway car for him was a 5, mine was a 2.. so he won.. and so on..
    This might not work for you.... but its a suggestion and its working so far for us. 

    This is for both of us our second marriage.  His first wife was of the mindset that the day was ALL about her.. and he hated it, never had a say.  My first was very small.  He is enjoying planning our wedding and its really nice for me to watch how happy it makes him.  He's had some great ideas as well.

    Maybe he will surprise you :)  Good luck

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Hinaj-you put it so incredibly eloquently!!!  I wish that could be posted on the main page as a daily reminder to everyone. 
     

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • HinajHinaj member
    1000 Comments
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_october-2011-weddings_groom?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:650Discussion:b48bb099-8ee3-45a4-9c4a-74c41e10ccefPost:15fd7e1f-6095-4f60-85ff-b578053756e2">Re: Groom!</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hinaj-you put it so incredibly eloquently!!!  I wish that could be posted on the main page as a daily reminder to everyone.   
    Posted by Scarlet Starlet 31[/QUOTE]


    Thanks Scarlet!!! 
  • I like saorisenyl's idea of scoring, especially if it's something you can't agree on! It's a good way to get an idea of how strongly he feels about certain details, too. Who knows, maybe he has good taste, too??
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • The points system is working great so far, thanks for the suggestion!
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