DOC advice! Please help :)

therockisblinding05

So my mom is the supervisor of a woman who is a family friend of ours. She used to work at a very reputable event planning company here in O-town and offered to be my DOC for free! Awesome right? Last night my mom texts me and not asks, but TELLS me we aren't using her because the lady has been "spreading rumors and lies" about her around the office. When I asked her exactly what was said, I found out all the lady did was complain about the way my mom manages to their boss in hopes of maybe working something out, it seems. My mom was offended that the lady said the staff feels like they are being micro-managed- which just sounds like a difference in work styles to me. Nothing personal or rude was said. I want to be sensitive to my mom, but i think she is taking something that was a professional complaint waaaay too personally (as she tends to do A LOT) and in my opinion has no legit reason for "firing" her. Honestly, my mom does not take criticism really well either so I can understand why the lady didn't just talk to her. I will probably end up just finding another DOC to keep the peace, but wanted to know what everyone thought first.  I dunno if it's because I'm in a bad mood but I am just sick of dealing w/ everyone's little issues. Should my mom just suck it up or should we just find a new one and PAY for it?

SarahSmile23

I'd find a new one to pay for and avoid months of messy situations like this one. I'd always rather pay more than have other people's drama forced onto me. lol.

*Adams*Bride*

I understand your feelings, however I would probably just find someone else to do the job. Is paying $600 something worth putting up with mama drama for the next 11 months? Plus if your mom and this woman get into somewhere down the line closer to your wedding do you want this woman to back out (if she is that way). I would think you would want your wedding to be a great day for everyone and paying for a DOC might be something you have to do to ensure that. It's unfortunate that your mom is being that way so you have to miss out on a free DOC, but if you go forward you'll probably being putting out fires between the two for the next year or biting your tongue while being quietly annoyed, either situation doesn't seem like a good one. :-/ GL!

katdec

I agree with the pp in that finding someone new sounds like the best idea.  If you already know there is some tension then it will not be worth it in the end. Your mom has already said that she wants someone new so I would go with that.

therockisblinding05

Ya, you guys are right...I should just suck it up and pay someone..it's not like it's the end of the world but I just hate shelling out money because of other ppl's stupid drama!  I think it's PMS, but I really don't have the patience to deal w/ it this week!

Pretty Parula

I was going to say tell your mom to suck it up, actually. But I've just gotten started with my wedding planning and already had mama drama, so I put a stop to it right away and it felt SO good! It does depend on whether your mom is the kind of person that will sulk about your decision for a while and get over it (like my mom, apparently) or hold a grudge forever. The latter would not be good. I just don't feel it's fair of her to ask you to shell out more money because of her personal differences with the lady. Now if she were going to pay for a new coordinator, that's a different story. I just have a big problem with paying more of my own money for someone else's issue, wedding-related or not. Best of luck!

John and Charisma <3

I would definitely get a new DOC. It sounds like this situation is just going to get worse and the extra money will be worth not having drama. Also, I would be kind of pissed if someone was talking about me behind my back as well...it may be true that your mom is not good with criticism but the lady still could have come to her first.