so here's my explanation for why i've been MIA....

mfields83

Hi ladies!  I've missed you so

I'm glad I checked the board tonight I totally forgot about knottie night... can you tell i'm ready for spring break?!?!  only 3.5 more  work days til freedom.

ANYWAYS... as i was saying on the knottie night post, I have been MIA b/c one of my bridesmaids (a cousin) stole my thunder   I hope I don't sound like I total BRAT, but I have talked to 2 of my other brides (one who is also another cousin - other side of family)  and they totally agree w/ me so I don't feel too bad lol

so this is going back to my e-party in jan.  she came down from tallahassee and came to my party but could only talk about how her boyfriend was going to ask her dad if he could marry her, etc etc etc... All she could talk about was HER getting engaged and how she wanted her boyfriend to propose blah blah blah.  It sounded like she was begging him to do it.  She is 6 years younger than me (she is the youngest of the girl cousins and I'm the oldest).  She barely said ANYTHING about my fiance and I's wedding.  On top of that, she didn't bring a gift or even a card.  ::sidenote:: ALL of my other bridesmaids brought some sort of personal gift, something really sweet & meaningful.  Many guests didn't bring gifts - & was def not expected - but as a bridesmaid, I'd think she'd at least write us a nice card.
SOOO about 2 weeks ago she texts me "I'm ENGAGED"! 
I'm trying to be so happy for her, but she is constantly texting me asking what I think about plans for her wedding, not once has she asked/said anything about mine.  She is planning her bach party for the weekend we were planning my shower, AND she decided she HAS to get married before me.  So she's getting married in November while my wedding is in Feb.  I feel like she is trying to compete or something and it's just really rubbing me the wrong way.  It sucks. 

Any thoughts?!  It's hard b/c it's family and I really don't want to start family drama b/c I'm really close w/ all of my family... sooo that's why I haven't really been around/posting much.  I know it will pass, and venting all this to you girls is already helping.... I just really didn't want to think about ANYTHING wedding for the last 2 weeks. 

Thanks for always being here ladies!!  You make the wedding planning fun   I am SO looking forward to our G2G on the 20th!!!

michimich810

I'm sorry to hear this is happening. Let her have her thunder. But yours is after and you'll have a better one! Your family will remember the most recent one. Does that make sense? Anyhow, I wish I could help. My cousin got engaged 7 months after me and her wedding is 3 months after me. However, it's her second marriage and she's kinda laying low.

shoegirl00

Dude, what a total Bi^$&!!! Sorry, if others dont think so but thats not cool at all. I would be pissed. I hope you dont change any of your shower plans. Maybe your mom can talk to her mom, she needs to change her bach date. so not cool.

waterroxy17

ohhh no!!! Sorry to hear! I can imagine what you are going through. 3 of my best friends go engaged around the same time and they are all getting married before me. It's hard when you've gotten engaged before and they are getting married before you. You  just have to know how wonderful your wedding is going to be and it's about marrying your best friend. She probably wants to be the center of attention at all time...and there will always be those girls.
Don't let her jealousy ruin your planning. XOXO

mfields83

Yeah beth that's exactly it!!  She can't stand to not be the center of attention, which just makes me feel like crap!!  She is going to try and "one up" me for the next 9 months.  UGH.  So annoying. 

And  there's no way i'm changing my shower date... it was extremely rude of her to do that, so if I can't make her bach party oh well i guess it didn't matter to her much if i was there or not...

dewreb

I'm sorry to hear all this! I'm a pretty moderate bride, certainly not a bridezilla, and I think the constantly talking about herself at your e-party was out of line, and REALLY out of line is her planning her bach party for the weekend of your shower. Have you told her that it hurts you that she would plan her party for the same weekend? Hopefully you will be able to somehow work it out! GL!

mfields83

I'm a pretty moderate bride too - def. not a bridezilla - i'm super easy going.... i'm just a big time "planner" and i like doing things/planning things in advance.  so i'm a little OCD, but not bridezilla haha  I do need to talk to her I guess - I hate confrontation - ugh but i know it's going to have to be brought up or it's not going to end well!! 

WeAreGs

oof... I'd be mad too! That's totally not cool! But as pp said, don't change your bridal shower date and if she gets mad, so be it... there are a million other weekends to do it on!

And he who laughs last, laughs best  ... don't stress her wedding being before yours... hers will be planned in a rush, while yours will be beautifully thought out

anaroo87

That does suck and she is definitely in the wrong.

I definitely agree with Gianina though in the fact that she will be planning hers in a rush and yours is thought out ,... everyone will definitely be able to tell the difference. Not only this but, if she was pushing her boyfriend to propose.. this engagement may not even last until Nov.

Talk to her if you can/want to to at least let her know that you're upset about her planning the BachP the same day as your shower... but don't get defensive about as that will only fuel the fire.

Good luck and chin up

herculeschloe

Wow, that must really suck! It won't be easy, but try to put her out of your mind and focus on YOUR day. All will fall in to place and on the positive side, at least she will have a hard time trying to steal the spotlight about her wedding since you get married after her now! Her's will be over and forgotten by your wedding

lyndopo

To me, it seems like she's trying to compete.. however it's really difficult when you're planning a wedding to not think and talk about it all the time. I've had to make a mental note about trying not to steal anyone else's thunder when I was planning... she's just not being considerate. I'm sorry you're going through this! Your wedding will still be beautiful and probably sooo much better than hers, afterall you have more time to plan!!

BTW, I had to edit the part of your post about the g2g. For fear of vendor lurking, we can't have date AND place posted. Sneaky vendors have shown up to our g2gs before... no bueno!

mfields83

oh wow lynette!!  that is crazy!  that's for the edit - i can't believe (well actually i guess i can) that vendors would do that.  do they honestly think that we'd be stupid enough to hire them when they are CRASHING our g2g?!?!?  oye vey.

mfields83

YES we are going!!!  my momma is gonna come too!  she has yet to have her first bridal show experience   haha i'll  send you a PM!