Family Vent

smuslin

Sorry this is going to be long.

I was short one bridesmaid so I asked my FI's cousin to be my bridesmaid. Her 17 year old sister got super jealous and complained to my FI about it. When the older sister dropped out because she cant miss class to be at the wedding. Which by the way is a load of bull I asked her 17 year old sister to be my last bridesmaid. She has been nothing but unhelpful. It took her 3 months to order her bridesmaid gown. Everytime I have asked her to help she doesn't answer me or is to busy with sports. Completely useless and I wish I never picked her. It has been a complete nightmare. There family is so obsessed with sports that they will miss anything for sports.

So I texted both her and her mom to tell them we are having the rehearsal on Friday at 3. For two days I don't hear back from them. Finally I hear back from her mom telling me she wont be able to make it because she has softball practice. Not a game practice. Well when I got that I went off and you can just imagine. I just typed her back ok. So then later that week but FMIL asks her mom if the bridesmaid will be coming to the rehearsal dinner since she is not coming the rehearsal. The mom answered I will not let her go by herself. Well the rest of the family isn't invited. So now my FMIL is scared that there is going to be a family feud over the wedding and over the stupid dinner.

What the hell am I going to do about her not at the rehearsal. She wont know anything and wont know how to do anything during the wedding. How rude is it that sports goes before a once in a lifetime event of a wedding. It is completely rude to me and my poor FI. I want to scream.

lyndopo

Oy!!! If you have a coordinator, maybe she can tell her what she needs to do the day of so she's not completely lost. That is realllllllly stupid though!! I'm sorry you're going through that.

herculeschloe

I'm so sorry they are being so ridiculous about this! People really don't understand how important the rehearsal is (how is this 17 year old going to know what she is doing the day of?!) and don't realize the expense going into the rehearsal dinner either. Are you inviting significant others of the bridal party? If so, I would suggest that you tell her mother that she can attend as her SO. If you are not inviting SO's, maybe you could have your FMIL contact the mom and let her know she will take the 17 year old "under her wing" at the dinner since seating is limited. Good luck

FutureMrsFezz

The situation sucks, but I wouldn't worry to much.  She is 17.  She doesn't realize how things work, and certainly doesn't care.  She's a kid.  I think the problem is that you are expecting way to much of her.  Your bridal party could have been uneven.  You didn't need to ask someone to "fill in".

Have someone tell her quickly what she needs to do (which is basically pretty simple) the morning of the wedding, it's not like she has to learn a dance routine.  Don't stress about it,  it's inconsiderate and rude, but it's really not worth your time and energy this close to your wedding.

sadou02

Sorry youre dealing with this.  But if the walk in isnt complicated, dont sweat it and just let her know what to do in the morning.

pizascorpio

I agree.  For the rehersal dinner invite the mom to come with her.  For the actual rehersal, just have anohter BM fill her in on the particulars.  I'm not having an actual rehersal, but the day of coordinator tellng everyone what to do. 

smuslin

Thanks for the ideas Girls. I am going to let my FMIL know she should invite her and her mom.