Review for ettiquette on pre-wedding wedding gifts

laura_fett

I'm pretty sure that the correct ettiquette for getting a wedding gift before the wedding is to open it, make sure it isn't broken, put it aside, and write a thank you note. Correct me if I'm wrong, we got our first wedding gift from FI's SIL's parents.

FI also thinks we have to invite them to the wedding because they gave us a wedding gift. I think we'll just send a nice thank you note.

chou_chou

Correct IMO on the thank you & opening portion of your post. 
All gifts received prior to the wedding can be/should be opened and a thank you sent ASA(reasonably)P and set aside for use until after the wedding.

You do not have to invite someone just because they gave you a gift -- that was very generous, very thoughtful of SIL parents, yes -- but you do not have to invite them to your wedding.  If anyone asks about it, and you feel the need to respond, just tell them that spacial issues prevented you from inviting some people and you had to stick to the rules of the venue!  (but if no one asks about it even better)

Oh, and not that you would, but then don't put any leading statements in the thank you that would lead them to believe they were invited if they are in fact not (like for some of my shower thank yous I said something like "thank you so much for the lovely (gift) and we can't wait to see you at the wedding!" since all those ppl were invited to our wedding as well)  Just thank them for their kindness and thoughtfulness and leave it at that!

Liberty27

Yes, you should open it right away and send a thank you note so the sender knows receive it.

I am not positive but I am pretty sure you do not have to invite someone just because they send you a gift.

Muffers

You're correct on all counts!
Open the gift and set it aside and then send a prompt thank you note. And definitely no need to invite someone who sent a gift, a nice thank you note is all that is required.

the first gift is so fun

Izzygrim

Does this apply to shower gifts as well (the setting aside part)??

KittE7

I'm not sure if it applies to shower gifts...
we wrote TU's the next day & then worked on immediately finding homes for the stuff.  Our dining room was a happy mess.   Some were just stored, but we've used about half of the gifts already!  PS, I had a "stock the bar" shower, so I got a lot of wine & a margharita set, so we've actually consumed some gifts already.