Anyone else experience Wedding Faux Pas?

shan87

I have 2

I was a BM in a wedding and was never sent an Invite or given a meal option she just assumed since I was in the WP I didn't need one -- AND she picked my meal for me. The reason I was super bummed- No invite to scrap book ! haha

My Cousin's wedding - The MOH didn't even get her dressed steamed it was a wrinkly mess and I was super embarrassed as another BM. No joke it looked like ir was rolled up in a ball and she just threw it on.

SuperRNluvsChef

My stepsister just got married 10/2 and the weekend was a little hectic, I was in the BP.  There were 9 BM and 8 GM, 3 FG, 2 aisle runners and 2 RB oh and 2 ushers so it was a huge party.  At the rehersal 3 GM didn't even show up.  Which I thought was just plain rude.  Everybody was late to the rehersal and for pics the next day for the wedding.  I just thought they should have been more respectful to my sis.

And pretty much every wedding I've been invited to the invite has had the registry information on them.  Some with an insert card and others with the info printed at the bottom of the invite.  It wasn't until I discovered these boards that I realized it's a big etiquette no no 

I Want Cake

I'm still waiting on thank you cards from weddings I attended 3-4 years ago.  Even if you didn't ask for gifts, please acknowledge the cash you get!

I'm definitely going to send invitations (and STD to MOH) to the WP people.  Yeah, they're guaranteed to be there, but they are bringing dates/spouses who might like to actually be invited.

I guess this isn't necessarily a faux pas, but FI and I went to a wedding in Kansas City.  The bride was wandering around outside with the guests waiting for the church to be opened.  Seriously?  I don't think anyone wants to see the bride schlep on her wedding day.  At the reception, there was no music or dancing or drinking allowed.  Granted, this was at a church banquet hall, so I understand the no drinking, but would it have killed them to have some music?  Anything's better than silence.

shan87

I want Cake - I'm also sending the WP invites mostly because I would like to know what they want for food LoL.

tpender13

I was in a friend's wedding right after we graduated high school, so most of the planning was done during our senior year. At the time, she lived way in the boonies and her phone service wasn't really reliable, so I couldn't call her. The bride went to school a few towns away, but her MOH went to my school.

I hardly got any info about anything WR. Like one Thursday I'd gotten a call from my friend asking if I was going to be at the dress fitting that Saturday. "Um, no, I haven't heard anything about it, and I'm going to be out of town anyway." Then a few months later, I got a call from the MOH all snotty, saying "Um, I'm at the rehearsal for the wedding we're in this weekend, where are you?" Nobody had said a word to me about this. That was in the middle of the week, and I didn't hear from the bride the next couple days before the wedding, so I said "Eff it!" and decided I wasn't going to show up.

I'd stayed at a friend's house the night before the wedding, and got home that day at about 10 AM. My mom told me that the friend had been calling the house since 7 for me. So, I had to rush around to pick up my dress and get my hair done, and barely made it to the ceremony in time. After the ceremony when I finally got a chance to talk to the bride, she started bawling, saying that she was so scared that I wasn't going to show up, that the MOH was supposed to have passed along all the information.

Yeah, the whole thing was kind of a cluster f*ck...

graysquirrel

A friend of mine who got married this spring included, very prominently in her invitation, all of her registry information. I hate this! I wish that people would learn to use wedpages. 

I don't think that this is technically bad etiquette, but my cousin got married for a second time this spring. They'd lived together for years and had a house, cars, grown kids, etc. They had a dollar dance at their wedding with the same old "help this young couple out" crap. So tacky. 

kristigiles

We received one invite with not only registry info but a message that asked guests to please include a gift receipt.  Really?  So rude.

We also attended a wedding right after our own that must not have paid much attention to their RSVPs or something because the room was set for WAY more people than what was actually there.  There were so many empty tables.  At the same wedding...after dinner the wedding party literally disappeared (to take pictures) and it was really awkward as a guest.  The dance hadn't started yet, but the dinner and cake and all that had been over for awhile...  Lots of people just started to leave because it was an awkward break.

graysquirrel

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_anyone-else-experience-wedding-faux-pas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:81Discussion:4d2ea800-2072-41b7-aa4f-218a49b442f7Post:8e408186-bf27-4d0e-8bd3-70b64b6c24cb">Re: Anyone else experience Wedding Faux Pas?</a>:
[QUOTE]We received one invite with not only registry info but <strong>a message that asked guests to please include a gift receipt.</strong>  Really?  So rude. We also attended a wedding right after our own that must not have paid much attention to their RSVPs or something because the room was set for WAY more people than what was actually there.  There were so many empty tables.  At the same wedding...after dinner the wedding party literally disappeared (to take pictures) and it was really awkward as a guest.  The dance hadn't started yet, but the dinner and cake and all that had been over for awhile...  Lots of people just started to leave because it was an awkward break.
Posted by kristigiles[/QUOTE]

<div>Unbelievable! </div>

kristigiles

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_anyone-else-experience-wedding-faux-pas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:81Discussion:4d2ea800-2072-41b7-aa4f-218a49b442f7Post:c276a7f5-2288-45c1-899e-ba19b879edbe">Re: Anyone else experience Wedding Faux Pas?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Anyone else experience Wedding Faux Pas? : Unbelievable! 
Posted by graysquirrel[/QUOTE]

<div>I know!  I absolutely couldn't believe it!</div>

leggwilliams

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_anyone-else-experience-wedding-faux-pas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:81Discussion:4d2ea800-2072-41b7-aa4f-218a49b442f7Post:8e408186-bf27-4d0e-8bd3-70b64b6c24cb">Re: Anyone else experience Wedding Faux Pas?</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>We received one invite with not only registry info but a message that asked guests to please include a gift receipt.</strong>  Really?  So rude. We also attended a wedding right after our own that must not have paid much attention to their RSVPs or something because the room was set for WAY more people than what was actually there.  There were so many empty tables.  At the same wedding...after dinner the wedding party literally disappeared (to take pictures) and it was really awkward as a guest.  The dance hadn't started yet, but the dinner and cake and all that had been over for awhile...  Lots of people just started to leave because it was an awkward break.
Posted by kristigiles[/QUOTE]

That is seriously the ultimate in tacky. "Please bring us a gift, but include a receipt because it probably won't be good enough so we'd like to return it for something we want."

kristigiles

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_anyone-else-experience-wedding-faux-pas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:81Discussion:4d2ea800-2072-41b7-aa4f-218a49b442f7Post:c72b3123-e3ae-45a1-a755-499fe28e3805">Re: Anyone else experience Wedding Faux Pas?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Anyone else experience Wedding Faux Pas? : That is seriously the ultimate in tacky. "Please bring us a gift, but include a receipt because it probably won't be good enough so we'd like to return it for something we want."
Posted by leggwilliams[/QUOTE]

<div>I know!  Not only were they telling us where they were registered and what to buy, they wanted a receipt for it as well.  Ohh thank you TK for teaching me the proper ways... <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-smile.gif" border="0" alt="Smile" title="Smile" /></div>

debbieupper

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_anyone-else-experience-wedding-faux-pas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:81Discussion:4d2ea800-2072-41b7-aa4f-218a49b442f7Post:3207e65e-02e7-4228-960c-4e47536b1ad7">Re: Anyone else experience Wedding Faux Pas?</a>:
[QUOTE]I was in a friend's wedding right after we graduated high school, so most of the planning was done during our senior year. At the time, she lived way in the boonies and her phone service wasn't really reliable, so I couldn't call her. The bride went to school a few towns away, but her MOH went to my school. I hardly got any info about anything WR. Like one Thursday I'd gotten a call from my friend asking if I was going to be at the dress fitting that Saturday. "Um, no, I haven't heard anything about it, and I'm going to be out of town anyway." Then a few months later, I got a call from the MOH all snotty, saying "Um, I'm at the rehearsal for the wedding we're in this weekend, where are you?" Nobody had said a word to me about this. That was in the middle of the week, and I didn't hear from the bride the next couple days before the wedding, so I said "Eff it!" and decided I wasn't going to show up. I'd stayed at a friend's house the night before the wedding, and got home that day at about 10 AM. My mom told me that the friend had been calling the house since 7 for me. So, I had to rush around to pick up my dress and get my hair done, and barely made it to the ceremony in time. After the ceremony when I finally got a chance to talk to the bride, she started bawling, saying that she was so scared that I wasn't going to show up, that the MOH was supposed to have passed along all the information. Yeah, the whole thing was kind of a cluster f*ck...
Posted by tpender13[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>... reason #999 no one should be planning their wedding in HIGH SCHOOL.</div>

SSaltzman87

I experienced many with just one wedding :-P

I was a BM (well almost, she kicked me out 2 months prior to her wedding because I had politely expressed that I didn't agree with the hairstyle she wanted us to wear) in a former friend's wedding and she totally got sucked into what wedding mags, tv shows etc say you should do.

She and her now husband switched up who was in the wedding party several times for a lot of superficial reasons. Her mom was a major 'zilla who actually threw a fit over the BM dress that was chosen. She had the balls to ask all of the BMs to help clean her house the day before the wedding (ceremony was in her backyard). She also had the girl who was supposed to be her Personal Attendant take my place in the BP.

kristigiles

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_anyone-else-experience-wedding-faux-pas?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:81Discussion:4d2ea800-2072-41b7-aa4f-218a49b442f7Post:a294eb84-c1ab-4adb-ae24-895ae264c0b2">Re: Anyone else experience Wedding Faux Pas?</a>:
[QUOTE]I experienced many with just one wedding :-P I was a BM (well almost, she kicked me out 2 months prior to her wedding because I had politely expressed that I didn't agree with the hairstyle she wanted us to wear) in a former friend's wedding and she totally got sucked into what wedding mags, tv shows etc say you should do. She and her now husband switched up who was in the wedding party several times for a lot of superficial reasons. Her mom was a major 'zilla who actually threw a fit over the BM dress that was chosen. She had the balls to ask all of the BMs to help clean her house the day before the wedding (ceremony was in her backyard). She also had the girl who was supposed to be her Personal Attendant take my place in the BP.
Posted by SSaltzman87[/QUOTE]

<div>WOW.  It sounds like an episode of "Bridezillas"!</div>

SSaltzman87

I know right! Being on the boards has confirmed that was I felt at that time was right and that she really did commit A LOT of faux pas!

dcprep

DH was just a groomsman in his friend's wedding. In their wedding invitation, they had an insert that essentially said, "Please don't buy us any items for gifts -- instead, please give us money so we can buy things for ourselves and our house."  #1 you shouldn't even be ASKING for gifts, and #2 you don't get to decide what people give you for gifts, if they even give you a gift at all.

shan87

dcprep- super tacky!!

Although I have heard ppl being invited via text and facebook.

FI wanted to do online invites and it took me a while to talk him out of it. I really don't see his 80 yr old grandma getting an email and then being able to respond.

Cascasbaby53

Maybe I'm just old fashion in my thinking, but I HATE when girls wear white dresses to weddings. I'm sorry, it doesn't not work unless you are under the age of 7, otherwise I think it's rude.

I know a lot of dresses have white background with prints on it and actually I think that is even cutting it close, but I've seen a lot of girls lately wear all white dresses to weddings. Honestly, at the last wedding I was at, there were 8 girls wearing mainly white or all white dresses. Sorry, deary, it is not your day!

GRRRR. Rant over.

hnovacek

Me and a bunch of friends were once invited to a wedding shower but not the ceremony or reception.  It makes for a really awkward time when they start talking about RSVPs and all the details and you realize that you aren't actually invited!  "Give me gifts please but don't actually come and celebrate with me!"

I also think that facebook invites to the wedding in place of paper invites get tacky too.  Save the dates are fine electronically, or a facebook invite in addition to the one in the mail are okay.  Facebook is just so impersonal!