Santa, tooth fairy, easter bunny

graysquirrel

I saw a thread on another board regarding telling kids about Santa; I thought that it would make an interesting conversation starter. Do you plan to have your children believe in Santa and other fictional characters? Why or why not? Is this different from the way your family raised you?

SuperRNluvsChef

Interesting post!

I'm embarassed to admit I believed in Santa for a loooong time (we're talking 10-11 years).  What can I say, my mom is good.  My lil brother is 9 and my mom still has him going, I think it helps when I also tell him Santa is still real hahaha.  I've heard ppl say "don't lie to your kids like that" and blah blah blah.  But I honestly don't even remember the moment she finally admitted he's not real, she'd admitted long before the Easter bunny and toothfairy aren't real.  I don't think it really affects kids, I think I turned out fine hahaha.  FI and I plan on letting our kids believe in Santa and the like, I loved watching my brother write his lists to Santa.  It's not as much when once you know all that great stuff just comes from your parents ;0)

MilitaryBride2Be

I don't see anything wrong with it. If they get above 7ish and are questioning it and you lie to them then i think thats a little weird. Some of my friend have done that to their kids so when they actually find out that santa isn't real i think they're going to be pretty upset.

Steph0871

I didn't believe in Santa very long (4?5?), but I was a curious little child so there's that. I said I believed in Santa far longer though, for my siblings sake.  

I think we'll let them believe as long as they want.  But never actually lie if they ask, like MB2B said.  Once they start genuinely questioning whether or not he's real, I'll be honest. That's what my parents did.  But they also made me promise not to spoil it for any of my friends who still believed.

saintpaulJess

My son just turned 7 this year.  From the time he was a toddler, I explained that Santa is a story that some parents choose to tell their children.  I did this for two reasons.

1)  Not all children get toys from Santa.
2)  I didn't think it was a good idea for him to start out life with the sense of entitlement that I think the commercial enterprise of Christmas contributes to.

I also explained that mommy would get him a few gifts each holiday season, but that it was mommy buying them, they didn't magically appear from "Santa".

As he entered kindergarten and then first grade this year, I reminded him that some children believe in Santa and that there was no need for him to tell them the truth.  He was cool with that.

I like the way it has worked out.  Christmas is still fun and exciting with a few gifts.  And I feel like I'm more in-line with the world-views I strive (or at least make strong attempts) to raise him with.

SSaltzman87

I didn't believe in Santa for very long as a kid. My sister, cousins and myself caught on INCREDIBLY quickly (when I was about 5 or 6) that it was one of my 8 uncles dressed up as Santa. My mom and other relatives failed to keep the jig up for long :-P

musicalsunlight

I see nothing wrong with telling the kids about santa/tooth fairy/easter bunny. I have fond memories as a child, waiting in exciting anticipation for Santa or the Easter bunny, being super antsy in my sleep. I miss that feeling on Christmas/Easter eve! :P I believed until I was about 8 or 9 probably. I still remember it because there is a room in our basement that has a lot of storage, and I went in there one day to try to find something, and saw way tucked back in the corner, a grouping of wrapping paper. I was horrified when I realized it was the "Santa" wrapping paper that had been used the previous Christmas. (My mom always wrapped Santa gifts in different paper, so we wouldn't be suspicious) It was disappointing for about a day, and then I got over it. I think kids can handle the truth when they reach that age when they get curious about it. I kept the charade up for both brothers because they were much younger than me, so my family didn't have a "santa free" house until I was around 17. But being that I celebrate Christmas/Easter for their original intent, I will also be sure to tell my children that the holidays are not just about the gift getting....When I grew up I was very aware of this as we went to church on both days as well. I think it is all personal preference, I see nothing wrong with doing it or not doing it, I don't think kids suffer either way.

hkiesling

Wait....what are you ladies talking about?  Santa still brings my presents to my parents' house every year.  Sounds like some of you are just sore about getting coal in your stockings.  :P

jesscmpls

I was always afraid of these fictional characters. Something about people sneaking into my room in the middle of the night scared me as a chid. I found out pretty quickly that these "people" weren't real. When we were kids we got most of our presents from parents and grandparents and one or two from santa, that is something that I want to continue with my kids. I want them to believe in santa, but i want them to understand the real meaning of christmas.

BooTheKitty

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_santa-tooth-fairy-easter-bunny?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:81Discussion:dc876289-f528-432e-aebd-e36399959954Post:cff82cac-317e-4945-a036-6e13184fed7e">Re: Santa, tooth fairy, easter bunny</a>:
[QUOTE]My son just turned 7 this year.  From the time he was a toddler, I explained that Santa is a story that some parents choose to tell their children.  I did this for two reasons. 1)  Not all children get toys from Santa. 2)  I didn't think it was a good idea for him to start out life with the sense of entitlement that I think the commercial enterprise of Christmas contributes to. I also explained that mommy would get him a few gifts each holiday season, but that it was mommy buying them, they didn't magically appear from "Santa". As he entered kindergarten and then first grade this year, I reminded him that some children believe in Santa and that there was no need for him to tell them the truth.  He was cool with that. I like the way it has worked out.  Christmas is still fun and exciting with a few gifts.  And I feel like I'm more in-line with the world-views I strive (or at least make strong attempts) to raise him with.
Posted by saintpaulJess[/QUOTE]

This exactly!  My parents told me straight up when I was little and I'm glad that they did.

graysquirrel

I agree with Jess completely. 

I don't get the difference between "letting" kids believe in something and telling them that something is real. If presents show up with Santa on them, then kids are being told that something is true.

I don't want to lie to my kids. I know that it is a white lie, but I still don't like the idea. I want to instill a feeling of gratitude within them and for them to remember why we give gifts at different times. It kinda sticks in my craw when the brattiest kids get presents because they were "good" all year and then some poor kids hardly get any. I wish Santa was real-- coal for some kids would be awesome, haha. 

acw016

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_santa-tooth-fairy-easter-bunny?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:81Discussion:dc876289-f528-432e-aebd-e36399959954Post:cff82cac-317e-4945-a036-6e13184fed7e">Re: Santa, tooth fairy, easter bunny</a>:
[QUOTE]My son just turned 7 this year.  From the time he was a toddler, I explained that Santa is a story that some parents choose to tell their children.  I did this for two reasons. 1)  Not all children get toys from Santa. 2)  I didn't think it was a good idea for him to start out life with the sense of entitlement that I think the commercial enterprise of Christmas contributes to. I also explained that mommy would get him a few gifts each holiday season, but that it was mommy buying them, they didn't magically appear from "Santa". As he entered kindergarten and then first grade this year, I reminded him that some children believe in Santa and that there was no need for him to tell them the truth.  He was cool with that. I like the way it has worked out.  Christmas is still fun and exciting with a few gifts.  And I feel like I'm more in-line with the world-views I strive (or at least make strong attempts) to raise him with.
Posted by saintpaulJess[/QUOTE]

I like that! That's probably what I'll do if I have kids.. Maybe I was just a cynical child but when I found out Santa, Easter Bunny etc. were all white lies I assumed Jesus, Moses etc. were too.

drdifabio

I actually love the idea of Santa although I was a pretty inquisitive kid and figured it out fairly quickly. I still got stuff from Santa up to college though I think. You know it is from mom and dad but I still thought it was fun. I really dont think that it was my parents lieing to me at all - more of playing along with a child's imagination. There is nothing wrong with make believe and that is all it was for us.

debbieupper

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_santa-tooth-fairy-easter-bunny?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:81Discussion:dc876289-f528-432e-aebd-e36399959954Post:f3898ab3-507a-4e94-b855-bffbc385ef5a">Re: Santa, tooth fairy, easter bunny</a>:
[QUOTE]I actually love the idea of Santa although I was a pretty inquisitive kid and figured it out fairly quickly. I still got stuff from Santa up to college though I think. You know it is from mom and dad but I still thought it was fun. I really dont think that it was my parents lieing to me at all - more of playing along with a child's imagination. There is nothing wrong with make believe and that is all it was for us.
Posted by drdifabio[/QUOTE]

<div>I second that. </div><div>
</div><div>I believed in Santa, the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, etc until I was maybe 7, when I caught my mom slipping change under my pillow after I lost a tooth. I actually pretended to stay asleep and then confronted her about it later that morning, haha. She owned up to it all and I felt pretty proud of myself for figuring it out!</div><div>
</div><div>BUT, I do think parents should tell their kids before they get too old. One of my friends still believed in Santa until 4th grade, and at that point I felt bad for her because I thought she was so naive (you know, 4th graders being so mature and all ...).</div><div>
</div><div>ACW016 -- that is hilarious! And makes complete sense.</div>

tpender13

I'm sure we'll let our kids believe in Santa. But yes, if they start asking, I'll probably do what Jess did and explain that Santa is a nice story.

I don't think I ever had a big revelation that Santa wasn't real; I think I just gradually figured it out. Or maybe I always knew? There was one time I was out shopping w/my mom - I have no idea how old I was - and my mom saw some stuff and said "Oh, these would be great stocking stuffers!" and started throwing them in the cart. She just stopped, looked at me, and said "You know Santa's not real, right?" That would've been a sucky way to find out he wasn't real if I still believed in him!

I Want Cake

As far as my mom knows, I still believe in Santa.   My nephew, who lives with my parents (long story), still believes very much in Santa/Easter Bunny/Tooth Fairy at nearly 8 years old.  Last year in 1st grade, his class read The Polar Express, with the whole thing about the magic bell.  Well, my mom, having plenty of spare time and money on her hands, sewed Polar Express bells for his entire class, but gave them anonymously, so the kids would think they just appeared.  The day they read the book in class, the teacher gave out the bells, and my mom picked up my nephew and he said "I really believe, Grandma!"  Granted, this is the same child who said, at the end of a midnight Catholic mass on Xmas eve, "is Santa going to pop out of the tree?!"  At least he was only 4 when he said that, but it made everyone around us giggle.

We'll let our kids believe for as long as they reasonably want to.  Now that I can see how magical this is for my nephew, I want to let it go on for as long as it reasonably can with my kids.  We'll give a quarter for every tooth lost, but I'm not sure about the Easter Bunny.  Having grown up Catholic and knowing what a solemn event Easter is, and the sacrifice involved with Lent (I still practice even though I'm atheist), I feel like it belittles the point of the holiday to make it about candy.  The same could be said how Xmas isn't about presents, but the birth of Jesus, but at least it's acknowledged and kids know the point going into it.

LCW2LCO

We will for SURE be letting our children believe in Santa, Easter Bunny & Tooth Fairy. The wonderment and amazement that exists within kids during the holidays is so magiacal and I have such fond memories as a child of Santa Claus and the like... I could never not give that to my children. My FI and I will for sure be doing our best to give our children that imaginitive fun until probably around 7 or so. Truth is, most times - like "other things" kids find out what things are at school from other kids. I just hope those kids that do know the truth don't spoil it for those that Believe.

To also reiterate what IwantCake was saying, our children will also understand WHAT Christmas/Easter are really about though... rather than candy/gifts. It will be taught to them at a young age.

jeepbaby54

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_santa-tooth-fairy-easter-bunny?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:81Discussion:dc876289-f528-432e-aebd-e36399959954Post:3135d6f1-84b1-4639-92db-2b0bff305d24">Re: Santa, tooth fairy, easter bunny</a>:
[QUOTE]Wait....what are you ladies talking about?  <strong>Santa still brings my presents to my parents' house every yea</strong>r.  Sounds like some of you are just sore about getting coal in your stockings.  :P
Posted by hkiesling[/QUOTE]

This!! :)

I also think that it's fun to have the illusion of characters for the younger kids growing up. Especially in households where there are children finding out at different ages. I'm not for lying to children, but I think explaining to them what Santa and such characters represent is important.

debbieupper

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_minnesota-minneapolis-st-paul_santa-tooth-fairy-easter-bunny?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:81Discussion:dc876289-f528-432e-aebd-e36399959954Post:331f6906-d11b-420c-8dc4-f3a9f020b046">Re: Santa, tooth fairy, easter bunny</a>:
[QUOTE] Having grown up Catholic and knowing what a solemn event Easter is, and the sacrifice involved with Lent (I still practice even though I'm atheist), I feel like it belittles the point of the holiday to make it about candy.  The same could be said how Xmas isn't about presents, but the birth of Jesus, but at least it's acknowledged and kids know the point going into it.
Posted by I Want Cake[/QUOTE]

<div>This is me, too! Exactly!</div>