Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards!

bethie0022

I was skimming through the most recent posts on the wedding boards (not on here, April 2013) and was appalled to see how vicious some people are on theknot! Is there not moderators for this stuff? There should be some kind of ban for multiple postings like I have read. Ugh!!!

I love this board - everyone is so nice here!

[Deleted User]

I agree.  I don't even read the others anymore :-P

nay1984

bullying is not just for kids...this is a perfect example that adults are doing the same thing and then we want our kids to be different..so sad  like get a hobby meanies!!

bethie0022

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:7ed3795c-a05e-491b-af37-829488b9b3e7">Re:Wow I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]You know it's funny no matter how many times those witches are called out for being ignorant they continue to act that way and justify it by telling eachother it's okay. All the kind people leave because they cant stand it, therefore making the rude ones the majority. These people all got married long ago and seem to regard themselves as wedding gurus who are perfect and know everything. A lot of them come on here to hide behind a computer screen knowing full well they would NEVER speak to us that way in person. They claim they come on here cause they love weddings but really I think they like being the cool kids of the forum, the biiitchy girls who no one likes but they bully others to make up for something they're lacking in real life. If they really want to give advice and help brides, they can become wedding planners. Otherwise, if you have nothing nice to say...
Posted by allychase[/QUOTE]

Well said! I could not agree with you more!!! Just to amuse you, I stated a similar sentiment on a thread or two that was getting out of hand, and you couldn't be more right - they all went on the defensive! And they got married over a year ago! Seriously? You have to keep posting on wedding threads and you've been married for well over a year?!?!? I find that hilarious - sounds like someone may need to get a hobby! And stay off here thank you very much!

bethie0022

I may be biased, but I think our board ROCKS - we are much nicer!

ChiGirl2013

Sadly, on some of those boards, the moderators are the ones who are part of the problem - so of course they're not going to delete any posts or put a stop to the nastiness.  I super puffy heart our board. 

Cryssteen

Ha! I literally posted the same thing here a couple of weeks ago!  Some of these chicks are insane! Not gonna lie, I read them just to laugh at crazy people.  Here and DIY have normal, helpful people who aren't going to tell you your guests/wedding party/parents/FI are going to hate you because your wedding ISN'T ABOUT YOU.  ugh... ca-razy. 

GinaV0822

I totally agree.  When I first joined I was one that called them all bullies.  I was simply amazed and asked if they would want their kids treated that way!  They all seem to say that we get upset if we don't hear what we want.  That is simply not true.  There is a way to disagree with someone, but to say it politely.  

I do read and feel sorry for many people.  There are some crazy questions out there, but no one deserves to be talked to so meanly!  

bethie0022

Agree - even if someone is totally off the mark, just ignore the question or politely respond. LOVE the kick your puppy comment above! I did stir the pot on one of their bullying comments - boy did they get pissed - it was AWESOME!!! LOL

So I could care less at how miserable these women are and that they have been married for several years now and still hang out on wedding boards, which I find hilarious, but if the moderators are part of the problem, isn't there someone higher up to bring this to their attention? I'm sure they would want to know what could potentially hurt their reputation. Just a thought - I really don't want to waste my energy on women like this, but at the same time, I love being an advocate when something is just not right.

cncoombs

Omg so glad to hear you guys feel the same way!!! They are so mean sometimes!!!

ChiGirl2013

Back when I first got engaged and joined under another name, people would actually follow you from board to board and leave nasty comments on EVERY thread you wrote on.  And that was a moderator! 

As it turns out, the moderator started a spinoff group of her minions.  Someone sent me a screen shot where they were talking crap about me (even though I never said a single kind word to them - I was just friendly with someone they didn't like.)  I emailed the screen shot to Knot Annie and the mod was removed.  Didn't win me any friends, that's for sure.  That's why, when we made our new (and FINAL) date, I made a new account.  Good riddance to my "old" posts and the memories of them making my life a living h-e-double hockey sticks.

[Deleted User]

Good LORD!!! That's just absurd...

wrigleyville

1) Some of the "old hags" became friends when they were new, and those friendships continued. They stuck around to chat with each other and help new brides.

2) Without some of those "old hags", most people would be clueless when it comes to etiquette, ceremony ideas, reception ideas, budgeting, etc. Look at how many questions get answered by brides who have been-there-done-that with contracts, timelines, gowns, and so on. Without their experience, there are many things I would have been confused about. The Vegas board, for example, saved me countless hours of planning time because they all had the answers and a spreadsheet for reference.

3) Suck it up. Sometimes you need honesty. Honest is not the same as rude. Just because someone tells you goldfish centerpieces are cruel to the fish and gross because of floating fish poop doesn't mean they're being mean. Your family will say, "Oh, how cute!" while thinking the exact same thing. Wouldn't you rather have a stranger give you the heads-up so you could save face with your family and friends? If you didn't want honest advice, why would you post on a wedding board? If you don't want people telling you that you're rude for doing something that's rude, then don't post about it. Just let your family and friends think you're rude for not inviting someone's boyfriend or having a four-hour gap or serving cheese and crackers instead of dinner and be on your merry way.

wrigleyville

Oh, and Ally? I told you your photo was annoyingly tilted and poorly Photoshopped because I was trying to save you from a bad photographer. Since I'm a stranger, I did it on an internet board.

If I knew you in person, yes, I WOULD say it to your face because I believe in letting someone know when they're getting ripped off. I'm sorry if that was too "honest" for you. Enjoy your crappy pics.

cwaggoner07

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:f968f163-bde0-4671-a7f2-b7e39acf3b06">Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE] I love being an advocate when something is just not right.
Posted by bethie0022[/QUOTE]


Um, that's what the OMH's are trying to do.

brittany634

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:c010b75b-3ec8-4b0a-8d71-c1fc8a3941ae">Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]1) Some of the "old hags" became friends when they were new, and those friendships continued. They stuck around to chat with each other and help new brides. 2) Without some of those "old hags", most people would be clueless when it comes to etiquette, ceremony ideas, reception ideas, budgeting, etc. Look at how many questions get answered by brides who have been-there-done-that with contracts, timelines, gowns, and so on. Without their experience, there are many things I would have been confused about. The Vegas board, for example, saved me countless hours of planning time because they all had the answers and a spreadsheet for reference. 3) Suck it up. Sometimes you need honesty. Honest is not the same as rude. Just because someone tells you goldfish centerpieces are cruel to the fish and gross because of floating fish poop doesn't mean they're being mean. Your family will say, "Oh, how cute!" while thinking the exact same thing. Wouldn't you rather have a stranger give you the heads-up so you could save face with your family and friends? If you didn't want honest advice, why would you post on a wedding board? If you don't want people telling you that you're rude for doing something that's rude, then don't post about it. Just let your family and friends think you're rude for not inviting someone's boyfriend or having a four-hour gap or serving cheese and crackers instead of dinner and be on your merry way.
Posted by wrigleyville[/QUOTE]


You are awesome! How dare you tell the truth to someone who asks for advice!

allychase

Yaaaaawwnn.

erbear84

Starting posts like this is like saying Beetlejuice x 3.  Yes, people are brutally blunt on other parts of the board; I've experienced it, too.  If you don't want to see it, just stay out of the drama, you know?  

allychase

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:c010b75b-3ec8-4b0a-8d71-c1fc8a3941ae">Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]1) Some of the "old hags" became friends when they were new, and those friendships continued. They stuck around to chat with each other and help new brides. 2) Without some of those "old hags", most people would be clueless when it comes to etiquette, ceremony ideas, reception ideas, budgeting, etc. Look at how many questions get answered by brides who have been-there-done-that with contracts, timelines, gowns, and so on. Without their experience, there are many things I would have been confused about. The Vegas board, for example, saved me countless hours of planning time because they all had the answers and a spreadsheet for reference. 3) Suck it up. Sometimes you need honesty. Honest is not the same as rude. Just because someone tells you goldfish centerpieces are cruel to the fish and gross because of floating fish poop doesn't mean they're being mean. Your family will say, "Oh, how cute!" while thinking the exact same thing. Wouldn't you rather have a stranger give you the heads-up so you could save face with your family and friends? If you didn't want honest advice, why would you post on a wedding board? If you don't want people telling you that you're rude for doing something that's rude, then don't post about it. Just let your family and friends think you're rude for not inviting someone's boyfriend or having a four-hour gap or serving cheese and crackers instead of dinner and be on your merry way.
Posted by wrigleyville[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Wrigley none of us have these terrible ideas... We're all simply saying how rude a ton of the posters, including you, are. To me you were rude at least. Also, why is "old hag" in quotes? No one said that in the OP or responses...</div><div>
</div><div>If you can't handle being called out for being snarky, rude, biiitchy, whatever you want to call it, then don't come over here. This is, after all, the April 2013 board... idk why any of you would even be here? 

</div>

vk2204

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:a3361669-4c36-4556-ac9b-2b4b32ada662">Re:Wow I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]Starting posts like this is like saying Beetlejuice x 3.  Yes, people are brutally blunt on other parts of the board; I've experienced it, too.  If you don't want to see it, just stay out of the drama, you know?  
Posted by erbear84[/QUOTE]

Thank you.

samantha24p

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:b4df0963-3333-4682-af89-71193ab2f60b">Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards! : Wrigley none of us have these terrible ideas... We're all simply saying how rude a ton of the posters, including you, are. To me you were rude at least. Also, why is "old hag" in quotes? No one said that in the OP or responses... If you can't handle being called out for being snarky, rude, biiitchy, whatever you want to call it, then don't come over here. This is, after all, the April 2013 board... idk why any of you would even be here? 
Posted by allychase[/QUOTE]



If you can call these girls out then expect for them to call you out!

vk2204

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:0520b68e-e08d-48f1-97a5-c8d022719650">Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards! : If you can call these girls out then expect for them to call you out!
Posted by samantha24p[/QUOTE]

Dude, go away. I am so glad you have balls to stick up for 'these girls'. I am sure kissing their asses will make you fit right in.

allychase

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:e7b6ddc6-4b0f-4a6e-84b3-71bd1e225b4b">Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards! : Dude, go away. I am so glad you have balls to stick up for 'these girls'. I am sure kissing their asses will make you fit right in.
Posted by vk2204[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>*Like*

</div>

vk2204

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:37cab8f3-9b48-4713-938f-a42e8544ee23">Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards! : You know what doesn't make us leave any faster?  When you come to our regular board and stir up more crap.  Now you can blame yourself as much as Bethie.
Posted by LingerLonger1[/QUOTE]

I don't have a problem with you coming here and defending yourself or whatever it is that you are doing. To be completely honest, I agree with you most of the time. I just think some people try too hard to fit in.

And what I did on your board was ask a question to people who seem to have a problem with what goes on here. That is why I asked what their deal was.  Just f*cking say what's on your mind, that's all I ask. People won't learn otherwise.

allychase

Vk, I thought you asked a valid question. I'm also interested as to what "vomitworthy" advice we give... Considering MOST of the posts on here aren't even looking for advice.. more like, "so excited! Only __ months left til the wedding!" or "I just got this done, what have you guys been doing?"

Yes, sometimes, we'll ask if any of us are doing something similar to what we're thinking. But overall this is a place where we're all pretty much just REALLY excited for our weddings and wedding planning. I guess someone could call that "puppy farts and glitter schit"... like sorry we offended you by all being genuinely happy and excited about this awesome time in our lives.

The best part is... I agree with the advice being given 95% of the time!! I don't agree with dollar dances, gaps between ceremony and reception, honorary BMs, registry info in the invitation, designating assignments to BP, etc etc etc but I've said a million times the way this advice is given is RUDE as fluuuck.

bethie0022

Yeah...I invited you over because I just LOVE bringing your BS to this board. Jesus - you aren't even getting married in April and you still post over here? LOL Wow....

wrigleyville

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_april-2013-weddings_wow-i-am-shocked-at-the-posts-on-these-boards?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:820178d7-4f43-4671-bcab-c5c2c01eef1eDiscussion:2aa47e3f-3681-403c-837a-31a7ad39a8ddPost:b4df0963-3333-4682-af89-71193ab2f60b">Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Wow - I am shocked at the posts on these boards! : Wrigley none of us have these terrible ideas... We're all simply saying how rude a ton of the posters, including you, are. To me you were rude at least. Also, why is "old hag" in quotes? No one said that in the OP or responses... <strong>If you can't handle being called out for being snarky, rude, biiitchy, whatever you want to call it, then don't come over here.</strong> This is, after all, the April 2013 board... idk why any of you would even be here? 
Posted by allychase[/QUOTE]

I can handle anything, dear. Dish out whatever you want. 

I just find it amusing that everyone seems to think this board is private when anyone can read it. That's why I'm here, to stick up for the "mean people" who are actually trying to help the idiots with bad ideas. Someone linked the thread, I read it, and I responded. Easy as that. I didn't realize my wedding has to occur in April in order to post here. I didn't see any kind of password field or application form.

"Old hags" is a common phrase used by newbs who are too busy playing with puffy hearts and glitter paint to know the difference between "constructive criticism" and "being mean". That's why I used that term, because the OP is not as unique as she thinks she is. This has been hashed and re-hashed every time a crop of newbs get engaged, start asking dumb questions, and then get called out for their BS.

No matter how constructive our advice is, any time someone asks a question and doesn't get the answer they want, they cry, take their ball, and run back to their month board to start a thread just like this. I'm sick and tired of it. I'm sorry your generation was given a trophy just for participating and that everyone's mommy scheduled play dates so everyone would have friends and get along and feel special; that's not how the real world works. Just because you're about to wear a puffy white gown doesn't make you Princess Special. If someone is being rude to their guests or stupid in general, they're going to get called out by those of us who understand how Life works instead of getting a pat on the back and a, "Sure! Go ahead and have crackers instead of serving dinner! It's YOUR DAY!" I would expect the same in return if I was doing something stupid and rude.

I didn't say anyone in here was dumb/rude, but by creating a thread like this, you have to realize people will have a problem with it. If I created a thread saying all newbs are stupid, you bet your tilted Photoshopped behind the newbs would be posting as much as the regs have in this thread.

If someone asks for an opinion and can't handle the truth, then they have no business being on the internet. None.

Welcome to The Knot. If you look like this -

<a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/2/14/324b12df-da47-4295-8e47-f96e1fe0437e.large.jpg" title="Click to view a larger photo" class="PhotoLink"><img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/2/14/324b12df-da47-4295-8e47-f96e1fe0437e.medium.jpg" alt="" /></a>

- perhaps it's time to join Wedding Bee, where everyone fluffs each other and exchanges puffy hearts and glitter pens while planning their SUPER SPESHUL DAY.

nay1984

did you really waste 7 minutes of your life writing that?

signed - I like puffy hearts! lol

Shlby81

Shlby81

Bout time some1 put them in ther place. They r meen.

allychase

Oh dear god I couldn't even get through that whole thing. Someone's taking the knot a little too seriously.